Saturday, March 28, 2015

Bob's Birthday Bash: Animen- The Galactic Battle

Not Anime, but a vague representation of it.  Leave it to China to copy Japan, since they are both fighting over the right to make all of our Electronics.  Today's Film is Animen: The Galactic Battle, a Film picked out by Bob.  It is apparently his Birthday or something, so I have to/get to watch this thing.  Right off the bat, there's an issue: this is the 2nd Film in a Series.  The first is a 2010 Film called Animen: Triton Force...which I haven't seen.  That one sounds like it sets everything up, so...crap.  Here's the gist of it: Humans evolved into two different Races.  One of them are Frogmen, who are, well, guess.  The other are basically Cockroaches, so they are evil.  Can the Bug Aliens be good for once?  Yeah, they are gross...but they are a part of our Eco-System and all.  So with that set-up out of the way, we now get...basically one long Battle Scene.  There's really not much to talk about here, so I may cheat a little.  Who's gonna tattle?  Not you, right?  To find out more about this odd bit of Chinese Animation, read on...
These are the Animen.  They are...

oh right, these are the Marvel Characters.  My bad.
No, this is what an Animen looks like.  They are kind of ugly, right?

These are the good guys and they are fighting to get a hold of some hu'Chips.  They are...something important.
As you can see, they are quite well-regarded.  These guys are part of Triton Force, a group of Frog Mech-controlling Soldiers who battle the evil Bugs.  Yes, Frog Mechs.
This Starcraft reject is the main bad guy.  He tries to kill their General and take the Chips.  He wants them as part of his plan to destroy everyone.

What- you thought he'd have a different goal?  Any guy with neck pincers on his face can't be up to any good, right?
After all the Character Set-up, we get some Star Trek: The Motion Picture-style 'Ship Porn' (long, sweeping shots of the Mechs) and then one long battle scene.

It looks nice enough, but it is just loud noises and techno-babble by the end.  The weird part: they make their Comic Relief Character (voiced by Keith David!) into the big hero by the End.  Other than that, no SPOILERS.  The End.
It is decent enough when the Action starts, but nothing special.  The Characters are either really Stock or just not that interesting.  We get Fat Comic Relief Guy, I'm The Leader Guy and Obviously Going to Die Heroically-Sacrificing Himself Guy.  At least we have a few good Voice Actors here like David, Bruce Boxleitner and Steven Blum.  The best performance goes to Veteran Voice Actor Jim Cummings, who really hams it up as the Villain.  He plays it up like he's Dracula or something.  Fun stuff.  I should note that one of the main Voice Actors does an Australian Accent (or just is Australian) which stands out in a Film with no other Accents.  I guess he's an Animen that is just generations removed from Australia...or something.  It isn't a big deal, but when the Film is this stands out more than it should.  Once you get past the 'Should I know this stuff' part of the Story, you pretty much just get Action.  It is not bad Action, but it isn't really great action.  That part is definitely Animated better, I will give them that.  With the lack of a great Story, all that Action just disconnects you all the more.  If you don't mind and just want to watch a George Lucas-style spectacle of CG Lasers and Explosions, this will work.  As for me, I can just hope that I don't get this next year on this day...
Not terrible, but it could have used more hair-sniffing Werewolf Cops or Tindalos Dogs.

1 comment:

  1. To be fair, Nyarko-san could have used more Tindalos hounds too. Or Lovecraft stuff in general. O_O