New Streaming: The Book of Boba Fett- Episodes 1-4

 With a new Star Wars Show coming, we might as well look at the last one.

Why am I not just doing the last 3 Episodes?  
If you don't know, you'll know.

The Show takes place after Season 2 of The Mandalorian, which re-introduced Fett into the Continuity.  Now that he's back, he wants to run a City.

Will it be that simple?
Let's Skip Intro and find out...

Fett and his Second-in-Command- another former Bounty Hunter named Fennec Shand- have ousted the person that took over after Jabba The Hutt's death.

Yep, we're deep in that 'between the Originals and the New Films' Timeline.  No reason to complain about TLJ here!

During the Episodes, we are treated- some people feel like I used the wrong word- to extensive flashbacks.

The idea is to show how Fett survived, lost his armor and got put back in place to show up in the other Show.

It goes deep into, for lack of a better word, humanizing the Sand People.  No, really.

Drama arises on all sides, of course.

Can they deal with the local Politician?
How about the Business Tycoons?
Outside threats?

It all seems to come to a head as a big time Cartel that deal drugs wants Fett gone.

Can he unite the other Criminal Warlords...or will someone else need to join in.

To find out, stream the Episodes now.

A good Show, even if people will continue to argue about the Pacing.  I'm not here to necessarily say that they're wrong...but I didn't mind.  There's a whole 'Prestige TV' thing where you can usually take a Story that fills 2 Episodes and realistically squeeze them into one.

For better or worse, Boba Fett has a deliberate way of telling its Story.  I didn't find the Flashbacks too bad, which I know is a real bone of contention with some people.  They told you a Story that needed to be told.  To be fair, the same people usually talk about how they don't like the changes to Fett...which are setup in the Flashbacks.

These early Episodes do make sure to mine nostalgia, but it's not too overt...so far.  Give them time.

The Show, as stated, might seem a bit slow and deliberate, but I think its worth the time to see how they can flesh out Fett.  Let's be honest- he was a cool outfit and mystery, but that was it.  Let's see if Disney can dig their way out of their recent messes with the Franchise.

Next time, the rest of the Season.  See how one new (not) face can change everything.  Is it for the better?  Stay tuned...

Tubi Thursday: Body Melt (1993)

 Sometimes a Title just calls out to you.  In this case, it said 'Hey, watch me.'

That was like 5 months ago.  I'm finally doing it.

Let's see how Splatter Horror was done in the Land Down Under...

In a weird Opening, we see a man injected with a drug post coitus.

The woman with him narrates about him 'losing his nerve,' so she injects him with a drug that will kill him.

He tries to make it to the future victims...but things don't work out for him.

It all relates to a company pumping people in a cul-de-sac full of strange chemicals and pills.

What's the harm?

Read the Title, silly!!!

A B-Plot involves two young men from said place stopping at a Rest Stop, which turns out to be occupied by a crazy man and his inbred children.

This goes on for A LONG TIME and only becomes relevant to the Plot right before the end.

The main Plot- which shows up about 45 minutes in- involves more of the Test Subjects going to the main Facility.

As you can see, it is well-guarded.

Once we get to closer to the Hour mark, the crazy stuff finally starts to happen quite frequently.

As the Title implies, you will see bodies melt, bodies mutate and body parts explode.

I...can't even tell you what is in this guy's mouth.
Trust me.

Will the people behind this get away with everything?
Will the Cops (who are always a Scene behind) solve the case?
Will anyone be left to celebrate?

To find out, stream the weird-ass Film.

It's like someone saw Society and Brain Dead, but thought there wasn't enough splatter.  Did they actually make a good Film in which to contain all of their splatter ideas?  Well...no.

The Film was made by first-time (officially) Director Phillip Brophy, who was part of a Punk Band (who did the Soundtrack).  The Film, in turn, is weird, random and very unfocused.  It doesn't quite know what the real Story should be...so it just focuses on every random thing.

If you watch these Films for the crazy Practical Effects and Splatter, it won't disappoint...with a caveat.  As noted, you'll have to wait a bit for the big, crazy moments and dark humor.  They are...something, that's for sure.

If you like weird, random Splatter mixed with lots of dark humor, it's worth a look.  If seeing a person's face explode isn't for you, then this Film isn't either.

A weird Film that isn't a technical masterpiece.  What it is, however, is a strange bit of Splatter fun for those into that kind of thing.

'90s Class?: Snow White- A Tale of Terror (1997)

 A Story most known for its Disney adaptation gets a darker take here.  This 1997 Film was made to be released in Theaters, but ended up on Showtime.  Showtime- We're Not HBO.  

In the time since this one came out, we've had a few more Films covering this Story.  At one point, we had Mirror Mirror coming out around the same time as Snow White and The Huntsman (which somehow got a Snow White-less Sequel).  

Can this match up to the original Grimm Fairy Tale though?  I'll put some comparisons in as we go.

The Cast includes Sam Neill and Sigourney Weaver, who supposedly took the role since it gave a more nuanced part for the Evil Queen.  She wanted to know why a Good King would marry her.

Does the Film live up to 20 years of hype (for me)?  Is it a forgotten gem?  Let's find out...

In the Cold Open- it is quite snowy out there- the Good King and his Wife get in a carriage crash and she's wounded.

She tells him to save the baby, which means (implied but not shown) cutting her open.

NOW the Film starts properly.

Years later, Snow White is a precocious young girl who loves her Dad.

Nothing can come between them...

...except his new Wife (Weaver).

In the original Story, she marries the Good King when Snow White is only a year old and learns that her beauty will be surpassed by White when she's seven.

Um...ew, I think?

Things turn for the Queen when she has a still-birth and is apparently rendered infertile.  Mind you, I think they still used leeches, so...maybe don't trust the Science here.

This was aggravated- at least in her mind- by Snow White wearing a white dress (rejecting the one she was given by the Queen) and everyone is distracted for her (dubbed) singing.

Time to consult the Magic Mirror.

Instead of the Huntsman, she uses her long-time companion (a Mute Master of Sleight of Hand) to try and kill White (who's about 18- hopefully).

He, of course, fails and kills a pig instead.  Did...you just rip-off an American Story for your German Folk Tale Adaptation?

She ends up with...well, not the Seven Dwarfs.  It sure beats using CGI for the effect like one Film did.

When the Queen learns that she's still alive, she, of course, kills her lying Assistant.

After that, she uses her magic to try and kill her, which leads to some of the not-Dwarves to die via crushing Earth and falling trees.

The Leader is not a fan of this.

The Evil Queen finally resorts to transformation and deceit to poison Snow White.

In the Story, she tries this three times.

First, it's a crushing corset.  Then it was a poison comb.  Lastly, it was the apple.

After all of this work, Snow White is fake dead for....five minutes of Screen Time.  No, really.

Alongside her former Fiancé (a character so unimportant that I didn't mention him until now), the trio try to stop the Queen and save the King.

They go full Horror Movie here, with crazy people, killer dog and more. 

The Fiance dies (oh no?) and we get a big showdown between Snow White and the Queen.

 Of course, good wins and the Magic Mirror shatters, wounding her before the fire kills her.

All of our (living) heroes reunite as the Cabinet that held the Mirror closes.  The End.

A good, if oddly-paced Story.  I like the Setup.  I like the finale.  In the middle, we find some problems with too much focus on some things and not enough on others.  Problems with the middle is definitely an American problem.

The Production Values here are quite good.  It looks like a Period Film, even if it is an imaginary Period.  They shot it in Czechoslovakia, which aids the Film to look as realistic as possible.  I'm sure they have stories.

Weaver shines as the Queen, who feels like a real person who manages to be driven crazy by her own imaginary problems and slights.  Yes, White isn't nice to her.  She is the second Wife, after all, who's there to 'replace' her Mom.  Did the King tell her how she was born, by the way, or did he gloss over that?

Snow White: A Tale of Terror is good, but flawed.  It is chock full of style and atmosphere...but a bit slow in the middle before it nails the ending.  It also features a 'knock-off' Wizard of Oz Character...

Next up, we stick around the '90s for a little bit longer.  Do I go with Psychological or Medical?  Stay tuned...

'90s Class: Sphere (1998)

 Jurassic Park was a hit, so they all must be, right?  Right?

This is 1998's Sphere, one of many Michael Crichton Film Adaptations from the 1990s.  To be fair, the track record is pretty good.  Besides JP, there's Disclosure, Rising Sun, Congo and...The 13th Warrior.  Again- a 'pretty good' track record.

This one, oddly, comes to us from Director Barry Levinson, who is not the person you think of when you think 'Let's give $80 million to make this Sci-Fi Film,' is it?  No knock on the guy- it's just not his niche.

With many Stars- Dustin Hoffman, Sharon Stone and Samuel L. Jackson-, Character Actors- Peter Coyote, Liev Schreiber- and two different Musicians/Performers on board, this couldn't have lost money, right?  Right?

To find out how, read on...

A quartet of Experts- Hoffman, Stone, Jackson and Schrieber- are sent to make first contact- oops, someone took that Title first!- with an alien ship.

The problem- the plan is based on a paper written by Hoffman...who was just kind of just winging it.

Whoops.

They go to the Wreck, which apparently has been there for hundreds of years.

Of course, this 2 hour plus Film makes you wait until about 20 minutes in to get there...

They find strange stuff- like logs mentioning people being there IN THE FUTURE- and eventually come across the titular object.

It's apparently silver in the Book, but when they did it for the Film it looked off.

I honestly like this change.

The group are trapped by an unseen storm- I guess there was no room in the Budget for wind- and things change when one of them goes into the Sphere.

Given that its the title object, it probably might be big.

While he's asleep, strange stuff starts to happen and the ancillary Characters start to die.

The Film works to fill out a Mad Lib that you never expected- STAR killed by CREATURE.

Did you pick- Queen Latifah killed by Jellyfish?  

You win!

They begin to communicate with some sort of spirit/being that exists in the computers/sphere.

It starts out friendly...until it decidedly does not.

The rest of the ancillary Cast dies off (which includes Liev Schrieber at this point in 1998) and the remaining Cast must figure out the mystery.

As it turns out, the Sphere- which they all entered at some point- brought their thoughts/fears to life and played them against each other.

As a final test, they must agree to let the Sphere wipe their memory of everything.

So, yeah, the whole Film is, say it with me, entirely pointless.

Now in an arty way.  The End.

A pretty good Film, if a bit slow and dense at times.  They sure take their time setting things up.  This works...to a point.

The actual Sci-Fi element of this is pretty interesting.  The Setting looks nice.  Even if $80 million was too much to spend on this, you see the money on screen.  FYI the Budget for Jurassic Park was $63 million.  Which was a better investment?

Weirdly, the Film acts vague with so many aspects and never quite shows some things.  Shouldn't we have seen one Squid?  We see lots of baby ones and all of those jellyfish, but I'd like to see more.  Was it a Budget thing?  Again- $80 million.  Did they make it and it was crap, so they cut it?

Sphere is a Sci-Fi Film with a good premise, but it kind of botches the execution.  At least it has this Huey Lewis Cameo.

Next time, a '90s Horror Film that I've remembered being a thing for a couple of Decades.  Was it finally worth the watch?  Stay tuned...

Tubi Thursday: Primal Scream (1987)

 No connection to Wes Craven...or that 1981 Film of the same name.  

If you want to see Sci-Fi on a TIGHT Budget (that took 4 years to make), this is...

The Film begins with the Ending, just like Sunset Boulevard.

Unlike that Film, everything else.

Seriously though, we get this Detective who exposits about how someone mined a substance called 'Hellfire' from Space in 1993, but there were protests.

He gets dragged into the Story that involves uncovering the secret of Hellfire.

The secret- it kills you.

Thanks, we already knew that.

That's about it.

People sometimes die in halfway-decent Practical Effects.
They show spaceships that only 'fly' when someone is holding the back (they don't show the back while it 'flies.')

This Poster...is a bit of a lie.

On the plus side, this was called a more accurate Title...overseas.

Does anyone make a Primal Scream once?
Nope.

Do I have anything else to say?
Nope.

Primal Scream isn't much to write about.  It tries to be Noir.  It tries to be Sci-Fi.  It tries to be a big Conspiracy Film.

It's...just not interesting.  It's not terrible...but it sure doesn't do much to impress.  The Acting is alright, but not great.  The Music is about what you'd get if you left a keyboard out in one of those Rooms full of Cats that people watch on YouTube.

It is still better than Rollergator though.

A few decent bits of people dying via the Hell Fire and turning into 'cigarette butts' (as one Character puts it) elevate this a bit.  That said, there are enough really bad and/or intentionally-vague Special Effects shots too.

The Director never made another Film after this...except for a Documentary in 2018 about how he made this one.  Sounds about right.

A

Buy The DVD: 'Sphere' Explains What Science-Fiction Is.

 Have you ever wondered what Science Fiction is?
Have you ever thought 'Is this Movie considered to be Sci-Fi or something else?'

Well, if you have, there's a solution:

Use Wikipedia.

If that's out, buy the DVD of Michael Crichton's Sphere to see how in the most random Special Feature I've seen yet.

First, you click on 'Special Features' to get you to THIS Menu.

Clicking on the first link is obvious.
Clicking on the last link gives you the SFs specific to THIS Film (like a limited Commentary Track).

That vague-sounding middle link brings you to this Screen...

A simple explanation.

Great.

There's more, however when you click Continue.

…and more still.

This goes on for THIRTY-ONE Pages (as it were) going from the beginning to modern Films (as of 1997, that is).

It's informative.

That said, why is someone's Thesis Paper on the History and Definition of Science-Fiction on here?!?

Thanks...I guess.

'90s Class: The Saint (1997)

 As we just saw the most recent return of Batman and will soon see the return of Top Gun, why not look at a guy who was in both?  Was anyone else a Batman and in Top Gun?  I think not.

After Batman Forever, Val Kilmer was more interested in a long-stewing adaptation of the classic TV Show.  It was just old enough to be retro at this point (as opposed to mostly-forgotten in 2022).  While this Film wasn't exactly a blockbuster hit, it sure feels like a good call to avoid Batman & Robin, no?  Ironically, his infamous replacement- George Clooney- once turned down this same role.

In The Saint, Kilmer is a master thief.  He can disguise himself as anyone (who looks alot like Val Kilmer).  He is sneaky.  He is smart.

The Plot is oddly-topical as it involves a Russian Oligarch (specifically in Oil and Gas) who seeks to unify the Soviet Union.  Sure glad no psycho is trying to do that today, right?  Right?!?

Is this better than you remember?  If you were too young, is it worth looking up?  Let's find out...

Kilmer grew up in an Orphanage (see Title Card above) that was so rough that he learned to idolize heroes, like the Knights Templar (I guess they didn't turn into eyeless Zombies in this Universe) and sneaking around.

If you think this background stuff will pay off in a big way (like him meeting someone from his youth), you'd be wrong.  Oh well.

He uses one disguise to break into a Russian Building...to sneak out of it and get back in on the roof.

By chance, he's found by the Son of the Oligarch as he's stealing a microchip, whereupon he tries to bribe the guy.

Said rich guy doesn't go for it, so The Saint escapes.

He proceeds to sell the chip on the Black Market and, say it with me, he plans to retire after one last job.

To be fair, I'd retire if I had $42 million, as opposed to needing another $10,000,000 myself.

He's hired, ironically enough, by the same Oligarch to steal a Cold Fusion Formula.  He's surprised to see that it's not an old lady (who are famously Scientists?!?), but a young one- Elisabeth Shue.

She was right off of her Oscar hype for Leaving Las Vegas, so a get for them.

He pretends to be a Poet/Artist to romance her and take the formula.

He's '90s Val Kilmer...so of course this works.

He actually falls for her- again, making me think that she'd end up being the girl from the beginning- and wants to back off on the mission.

However, the Oligarch- who seems to know that he was also the Robber from before- pressures him to steal her research.

How much did Nokia pay for this?

Shue tracks our Hero down, since he always uses the names of Saints for his pseudonyms.

She's mad at him, but also in love with him.  Again- it is '90s Val Kilmer.

They are then targeted by the Oligarch for obvious reasons.

It all comes to a head when the Oligarch unleashes a complex plan to take over as President.

Since the Cold Fusion Formula doesn't work, he gives it to the President.
He then leaks the idea that the President bought the formula (but not saying from whom).

He pulls the President and the Saint to reveal that the device doesn't work...but The Saint got it working via Shue's notes.

Shue gives Cold Fusion to the World and has, of course, fallen madly in love with The Saint.

He drives off wearing the pin she gave him (aka the Show's Logo) to set up future Films...that never got made.  The End.

A fun and exciting Film...to a point.  The Plot is a solid one, giving us an origin story of sorts for the character.  I guess they felt that we needed this.

Mind you, James Bond started out as James Bond in 1965 and didn't get an Origin Story Film until the mid-2000s.  To be fair, The Saint- despite the Bond connection- is not equivalent.  He's popped up numerous times, but this is the most famous example since the Show ended in 1969.  

That said, I like his origin stuff post-flashback.  Him being a thief who learns to do good is a nice journey.  They also improved things from the original Script, which had Shue die and a big Action Set-Piece to close the Film.  Him defeating the bad guy through subterfuge and hoisting him on his own petard is much better.

The Film is kind of long and could have probably been a tighter experience.  At just under 2 hours, it could have been trimmed to a tighter 90 minutes without losing much.  Speaking of lost, let me point out the fun voice cameo from the late Sir Roger Moore...as well as someone credited as 'Japanese Video Girlfriend.'  Who?

Next time, I stick with the '90s for another Michael Crichton adaptation.  As big and great as Jurassic Park was, there was at least one other flop from this Decade.  Stay tuned...