Poor Bastards of Cinema: Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (1973)

 A guy who doesn't even get his name mentioned on the Wiki Page!

In Don't Be Afraid of the Dark, a young couple move into a new House.

The Wife is showing off what needs work done to her Interior Decorator friend.

He vanishes from the Movie after this Scene.

He returns in Act 3 as he's visiting the Wife again about work to be done.

Like before, they go downstairs.

...only for the creatures to set out a rope line and trip him!

He falls (off camera) and is shown to be dead at the bottom of the stairs.
(This Film was shot in a week- no time for Stunts!)

Yeah...that's it for him.

This guy didn't even really know about ANY of the danger.  He wasn't a threat to the creatures.

He was collateral damage, as they meant to trip her instead!

The moral- don't be a Designer in a '70s Movie.  You either end up dead (him) or as a Vampire...and then dead (Blacula).

It's not worth the risk. 

Rare Flix: Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (1973)

 Is it possible to scare lots of people with a simple TV Movie?

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark was, you guessed it, a TV Movie from 1973.  It was made as part of a TV Movie Series for ABC.

Back before VHS, DVD and later Streaming, Movies of the Week were a big deal.  Think of them like Netflix Originals, but for the bunny ears on TVs Generation.

The Plot involves a young Couple who move into a House and the Wife is drawn to a bricked up fireplace.  This didn't end well for the Amityville bunch, but will it here?

She eventually learns that something was living down there and now its free.  As a liberated '70s woman, however, everyone thinks that she's just nuts!

Can she solve the mystery and save, well, herself?

To find out, read on...

A young couple settle on an old House to live in while the Husband works towards a promotion.

Something about this locked room with a bricked off fireplace draws the Wife to it.

The Handyman tells her to leave things alone and that it is impossible to mess with it.

These two facts seem contradictory.

He also doesn't just explain things, so the Movie can happen.

The Movie happens, naturally, and she does open the fireplace.

After she leaves, we see a green glow and strange voices talking.

Weird stuff happens around the House, but only around her.

Her Husband thinks that she's just stressed and imagining things.

'70s Husbands were the worst!

As it turns out, she was right.

There are weird little...whatever they are that escaped.

They want her.  But why?!?

They plan to go after her while the Husband is away meeting with a client.

It also seems that the creatures change sizes as they were last seen the size of a switchblade.  The next time, they are as tall as trash cans.

The Wife and her Friend are at the House while he's still away.

They take the power out and put some sleeping pills (given to her by a Doctor) in the lady's coffee.

The friend gets locked outside- these guys are fast as hell!- while the Husband leaves to get the information from the Handyman.

The House was built in the 19th Century and the Man who owned it was dragged down the fireplace hole, hence it being boarded up.

Can they get there in time to save the Wife as she's being dragged away by the creatures?

Nope- it's the '70s.
People were really bleak then.

Sorry- I hope you have better luck in the Remake.

A strong, tightly focused tale of terror (with a few silly details).

It should be noted that this one was fast-tracked into Production on account of a looming Writer's Strike.  It was done in just two weeks.

With that in mind, the final product is still pretty darn good.
The Plot works, making you empathize with this poor woman that nobody believes.

The main issue- the creatures.

They look odd and creepy- no question.
The look of them aside, they change in scale, their mouths don't move and we don't really know why they are doing what they are doing.

If you can accept how strange and kind of silly the creatures are, you can have a good, frightful time!

Next up, I check out a Horror Comedy that I've been putting off for ages.  If you like Wolves, you're in luck, right?  Stay tuned...

Bail Bond: The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)

 After a long(ish) gap, Bond is back!

The Spy Who Loved Me is the 1977 entry into the Series and yet another Roger Moore Film.  I'm pumped!

With a three-year gap between Films, did much change?
Well, we have a new Director- although he did do You Only Live Twice with Connery- and 2 new Writers.  Supposedly Tom Mankiewicz did an uncredited rewrite.

In short, this is NOT based on the Book whatsoever and was compiled from a composite of various Screenplays and tweaked when rights weren't available.

We wouldn't get SPECTRE again until, well, Spectre with Daniel Craig.
This would turn out to be the final Film by French Cinematographer Claude Renoir (not the painter) as well.

The Plot involves a crazy rich guy (in both senses of the phrase) and a Plot that manages to unite Britain and Russia.  It also introduces one of- if not the- the most famous Bond Villain Henchmen ever in Jaws.

This Film has a few Jaws connections, it seems, from this Character to using a shark and even...Albert R. Broccoli turning Steven Spielberg down when he offered to Direct?!?
That's real (according to Wikipedia)!

Will this Bond Film return things to glory?  To find out, read on...

We get a big Intro that does a number of notable things.

There's a parallel Scene with Bond leaving his lady and Barbara Bach leaving her man.
Said man is the lead person pursuing Bond down the slopes and gets killed.

Bond parachutes into the Film's Title Sequence (both parodied by American Dad later)

This is Karl Stromberg.  
No, he's not Werner Herzog.

He's a crazy rich guy who is leveraging a tech for tracking submarines as part of his evil plan.

To check off an Austin Powers box, he drops a lady in a shark tank to kill her.

He has two main Henchmen- Jaws and the burly guy from Dr. Phibes Rises Again (the 2nd greatest Film of all time).

Anyone who has seen the blueprints to the device must die!

Moore and Bach are also separately sent to find just that, meeting up with a source in Egypt.

They aren't combative, but they aren't working together...until Jaws tries to kill them both.

They get away and keep pursuing the tech while slowly falling in love.
Like the Title!

Jaws, of course, shows up to kill him on the train a la Live and Let Die.
I guess he's early for his Show Up at the Finale to kill Bond, since he misses it.

This is a Bond Film and we need implausible, but amazing technology.

In this case, Bond and Bach are pursued by the bad guys on the road by a bike, some cars and a helicopter (flown by Caroline Munro!)!

Bond drives into the Ocean and the car turns into a submarine...kind of.

They end up on a Submarine together when the Brits and Russia agree to join forces.

Things get complicated when she learns that Bond killed her man (who was played by the guy who nearly took Moore's job).

On the bad guy's ship, a shootout/fight breaks out.

Bond uses science (he does?!?) to ride a bomb to take out the blast shield to stop the evil plan.

Jaws and Bond have one last face-off (pre-finale) and he uses a big-ass magnet to drag Jaws into the water.  He fights the shark, so Jaws vs. Jaws?

This is after Bond took out Stromberg.

Bond and Bach escape Stromberg's Base (Atlantis) before the Navy destroys it.

They get away in an escape pod (naturally) and their vehicle is brought in by both sides.
Bond makes a sex pun and the Film ends.

A big improvement over the last Film- sorry, Scaramanga.

This one feels like a fully formed Script and it all flows together tonally.  There are silly moments- like how Jaws can rip doors off of cars and can't die- and it doesn't fight against the Film's tone.

The Plot is pretty silly, but treated seriously.  So, when the bizarre stuff happens, you accept it.
After Bond's 27th death quip, you're in it to win it.

Moore said that this was his favorite Bond and, yeah, I can see that.  It doesn't have That Boat Chase, but it is damn good.

This one feels like a big, grand Bond Adventure.

Thankfully, this one brought Bond back to the big time and we got lots more of these Films.  It's crazy to think what life would be like without it.

Speaking of things that life would be different without, is this a rip-off of the Jaws Intro?

Next up, a little diversion to a Parody Film which is topical again.  Has this one aged as well fine wine or Surge Cola?  Stay tuned...

Bail Bond: The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)

 How was this nearly the end of the Franchise?!?

Today's Film is The Man with the Golden Gun, the 1974 Sequel to Moore's first Bond entry.

This is based on the last of Ian Fleming's Novels and there's even some dispute about whether he finished it or not.  Was this his Silmarillion?  

Regardless, Bond is back and a new threat is after him.  He's got the most OP Weapon in Goldeneye too.  Good thing Oddjob is already dead or he'd be unstoppable!

There's also a Plot involving a scientific MacGuffin too.

The Film was made at a weird impasse as recent Series Writer Tom Manciewicz is only the Co-Writer and Producers were pushing for some changes to Bond.
Throw in them trying to cash in on the latest cinematic trend and you have an interesting Film.

To see how interesting, read on...

In a Cold Open, a man pays some money to try and kill Scaramanga (Christopher Lee), as he's the World's Top Assassin.

He fails, of course, but only after we see the man's obstacle course/Disney Attraction that will show up in Act 3.

A bullet with Bond's name on it is sent to MI6 and he's now aware of the threat.

There's also the matter of how unique the bullet is- one made for just a single, special gun.

Thankfully, it is so special that you can just track down the maker.

Bond follows the trail- as the maker is sending more bullets to Scaramanga- and it leads to this lady.

Moore's Bond actually threatens her for information, which was a change that Producers wanted.
Moore didn't like it and...yeah, this doesn't feel earned.

Nobody knows what Scaramanga actually looks like.  
At the same time, they know that he has a third nipple.

How?  Shut up- that's how!

Bond uses this to try and trick the man who hired him and...yeah, you can see the hole in this plan already, can't you?

Bond is caught, but they won't kill him at the house of the man- a billionaire- for some good reasons.

Instead, they transport Bond to a Karate School and make him watch some fighters before making him also fight.

He makes an escape, but then needs back up.  It soon comes in the Nieces of his fellow Agent (who is Korean, but has a Thai and Chinese Niece?) who kick major butt.

And yes, before you Google it, that is the Landlady from 'Kung Fu Hustle' on the right.

Due to the Director liking the Character, Sheriff Pepper just happens to be on vacation where Bond is on the mission and gets roped into helping Bond.

Sure- why not?

They do an amazing car spin stunt- which they failed to recreate on Top Gear- but Scaramanga escapes by strapping wings and an engine to his car to fly away.

The MacGuffin really comes into play here as the good guys and bad guys fight over it.

Bond gets it from the bad guys and it ends up in not-so-good Agent Goodnight's hands...and she's taken by the bad guys.

Bond goes to Scaramanga's Island- now legit called James Bond Island- and is forced to duel him.

On his home turf and with his henchman Nick Nack, Scaramanga can't lose.

He does, of course, as Bond switches outfits with the Bond Statue- introduced in Act 1- and kills the surprised villain.

In the aftermath, they must escape from his base and recover the MacGuffin before- and say it with me- the place explodes.

Naturally, Nick Nack snuck onto the boat and a final fight ensues!

Bond manages to lock him in a suitcase- he's small, you see- and...well, he just takes him off-screen.
Did he throw him overboard?  Maybe.

Oh well, the End.

A Film that I enjoyed...but I can definitely see the issues.

The Film has some odd issues with its Tone, to say the least.

It is funny at times, with the Sheriff reappearing, the slide whistle used during the car stunt and just how dumb they made Britt Ekland's Goodnight.

In contrast, Bond is somewhat abusive to Maud Adams' Character and her sad arc feels reminiscent of the one we'd see with Severine in Skyfall a few Decades later.
We also get some rough and tumble fighting early on, with Bond even bleeding.

The Film can be fun, but is never quite sure what it wants to be.

So much of it is silly- like having Nick Nack so prevalent- and it eventually goes full cliche. 
Why does Scaramanga need an Island Base and a big-ass laser gun?

I definitely had fun with this one, but I can see why Critics- and Audiences- had some issues with it.  I really like everyone involved here, but...yeah, it's a bit silly and confusing.

Instead of moving forward, we're directly lifting stuff from Diamonds are Forever...

A Dumb Helper in a Bikini for Act 3?  Where'd they come up with this idea?

Next up, a quick Bond break to check out a Film Trilogy.  I finally got my hands on all 3 of the Dragon Tattoo Films, so let's check them out...

Fiction vs. Fiction: Black Sunday (1977)

 Let's celebrate the Big Game (TM?) with a look at possible peril!

I already watched and reviewed Black Sunday years ago, but didn't get the Book until later.

Well, now let's see how the two match up!

This is...

***VS***

What's the Same?

As the Film is based on the Book, the Plot doesn't change.

It is still about a crazy guy being manipulated into attempting to blow up a blimp during the Superbowl.

What's Different?

For starters, the Film was released 2 years after the Book, so the Setting has to change.  The Book is set when the 1975 Game happened and the Film is set when the 1977 Game happened.

In addition, the Book gives you way more backstory on everyone involved, from the villains to the heroes.  The former gets a whole Chapter to set up why he's so crazy and driven.

Curiously, the biggest difference here is just who survives the Story and who doesn't.

The 3 Writers for the Film mixed things up for one reason or another.  So...

Kabakov (Robert Shaw) dies in the Book, but lives in the Film.
Moshevsky (his Partner) lives int the Book but dies in the Film.

(A random Cop is killed in the partner's place in the Book)

Fasil (the planner) survives to be tried in the Book but dies in the Film.

Muzi (the importer of the explosives) is tortured for information in the Film, but this happens to Fasil in the Book.

In addition, Muzi dies in an explosion set by the villains in the Book, but now he's a Japanese Captain in the Film.

The last big change is in the branding involved.

The Book uses the fill-in TV Station name of NBS, but the Film uses CBS and real Broadcasters.
They also got Goodyear to let them use their blimp, but conditions were attached to this.

They had to say that Landers (the Pilot) was not an official Employee and they couldn't blow up the blimp with 'Goodyear' facing the camera.
No, really.

Final Thoughts

Both versions are good- no question.

One is a tense Book Thriller that really explores the Characters.
One is a tense Film Thriller that delivers on all of the big moments.

To be fair, the finale of the Book is rushed.  They only launch the Blimp in the last EIGHT PAGES (of a 318-page book).

There's really no bad option.

What is Better?

A hard choice, but I give the slight edge in execution to...

The Film

I'm glad that I got around to reading the Book and rewatching the Film.  Give them both a look, honestly.

Bail Bond: Live and Let Die (1973)

Is this still my favorite Bond Film in 2026?

Today's Film is Live and Let Die, a 1973 Film that marks the return of James Bond to Theaters.

After Connery turned down a massive payday (something akin to about $30 million today), a new Bond had to be found...again.
The Producers yet again went to Roger Moore and this time he was free (having been busy doing two different Shows when asked in the past).  He was actually OLDER at this point than Connery was when Diamonds Forever came out but didn't look or feel it.

The Plot is a big swing, going from tales about billionaires wanting world domination to being about a drug kingpin.  It is also heavily a Blaxploitation Film in all of the best (and sometimes worst) ways.

Yaphet Kotto really shines here, also giving us our first Bond Villain of Color.  We also get our first Bond Girl of Color in Gloria Hendry, but I'll get to my issues with that later.

Start humming that Oscar nominated Bond Theme as I dive right into...

In the Cold Open, a trio of Agents are killed while spying on Mr. Big (a drug kingpin) and Kananga (Kotto).

One via sound blast (I think?), one via stabbing and one via snake/voodoo ritual.

Moore got his buddy cast as Agent Dead Meat #2

Bond- after a wacky bit of hiding the lady he just slept with- is off to New York to meet up with Felix (David Hedison) and find out what Mr. Big is up to.

Kananga is also in the City too, which is certainly not a coincidence.

People often refer to Blazing Saddles- released a year later- but I think other Films are more applicable.

Thanks, Tom Mankiewicz.

Bond fails at the Secret part of the Secret Agent role and falls into Mr. Big and later Kananga's clutches, followed the whole time.

He meets Solitaire (Jane Seymour) who is the Fortune Teller/Tarot Card Reader for the latter.

After escaping, he follows the trail to Jamaica, where he meets up with a new CIA contact in Rosie Carver (Hendry).

Her role consists of being scared, being incompetent, having her ass grabbed by Bond...and then being revealed as work for Kananga (not of her own free will).

She dies after running away.

* A sort of progress, no? *

Bond sneaks into Kananga's Base there and meets up with Solitaire.

He tricks her with her cards into sleeping with him, which he doesn't realize will make her 'lose her powers.'

To be fair, she did clearly want to sleep with him, but he did cheat with the cards.

As we end Act 2, Bond meets up with Mr. Big again and then the truth comes out.

Mr. Big is Kananga.

He's planning to flood the US with Drugs and then exploit the addicts.
Don't worry- Trump will pardon you.

In New Orleans, we get two of the Film's iconic Scenes.

A Captured Bond must first find a way to escape crocodiles (and not alligators?) surrounding him.

Later, he takes a speedboat and takes part in a massive, amazing Chase Scene.

*****

A climactic series of Action Scenes ensues.

Bond kills Baron Samedi, he blows up the drug supply and then fights Kananga by some sharks.
Yes, this Film has Crocodiles AND Sharks.

He uses a very recent Chekhov's Gun to blow up the bad guy.

Of course, the Henchman wasn't actually killed and is here for One Last Hurrah.

Bond kills him on the train, in spite of him being a full-on cyborg that looks like Tony Todd.

The End.

A Film that is very dated and very fun.

This Bond Film feels like a breath of fresh air.  After so many Films with Connery (and one with Lazenby), it was needed.

The villain sells drugs.  Bond goes to Harlem.  Voodoo.

Moore is a really great Bond, since he feels so different from Connery.  That's not a dig on him, but you don't want a repeat after a Decade, no?

Kotto and company really shine here as well, chewing the scenery just the right amount.  His plain is crazy.  His demeanor is unbalanced.  He's so good.

The Action Scenes and Atmosphere really seal the deal.  It's so good.  It's so bonkers.
Even better, it is the start of a new Series...

Next up, an Action Film with both Ice T and Cube in it.  That's a good pick for Black History Month, right?  Stay tuned...