Lost In Translation: Halloween- The Curse of Michael Meyers

 As long we have Movies, we will have Halloween Movies.

In spite of the Franchise being 'killed' at least 3-4 times, it keeps sitting up and coming back for more.

To celebrate the undying spirit, here's the Italian Poster for the Film that killed the Franchise the 2nd time...

…um, what?!?

Where to begin here?!?

Michael is blue.  
He has a lady stuck in her face?!?
Why is she naked?

What is with that font?!?

So you don't ask, I did add that red bit to blur out the boobs on this Poster- sorry if that's an issue for you.
They are there on the real thing if you *really* need to see them.

For comparison, here is the original (also censored)…

The Poster- taken from the highest quality scan I could find- is mostly washed out from age.  Also those creases- ugh.

New Streaming: Creepshow- 'All Hallow's Eve'

 As it may seem obvious by now, I saved one Episode for the right time.  Let's take one last look (from Season 1) at a story from the Creepshow.

This is...

A group of young people are getting ready to go out Trick or Treating on Halloween.

There's some tension about why they are 'still doing it.'  Why?

One of them has to bring their little Brother along as well.

What's up with the kid and him not talking?

Why do the Adults in Town seem far less than happy to see these kids again?

I mean, I don't like getting up every three minutes to give out candy, but I'm not that morose.

Why do the Parents freak out so much when the teens arrive?

To find out, stream the Show.

An interesting tale that plays out in a fairly-unique way.  I like the way they play coy about what is going on for so long.  They play up the teens 'being tired of it,' which could just be them growing up and out of Halloween.  Of course, if you know the story, you know what they are *actually* tired of.  No SPOILERS here.  All of the mysteries are set up nicely and pay off just as nicely.  Seeing the sad Parents is confusing at first, but is explained.  Likewise, seeing the angry, defensive Parents (like above) is also explained.  When you finally know the whole Story, it all makes sense.  The Acting is good here, being dramatic when necessary and fun when necessary.  There's a nice biting wit to the whole tale.  It's also not exactly a *happy* tale (from most points of view).  It's not the most unique tale.  It is not the scariest tale.  It is, however, a good Horror Tale for this Season and I have no regrets about saving it for now.  If you are actually holding a Halloween Party in this crazy time (and please do it safely), I recommend this as an easy watch.  Oh and delaying this Review also means that this Teaser is closer to fruition now...

Here's to Season 2!

Top 10 Bizarre Halloween Episodes of Shows (That You Wouldn't Think Had Them)

 As Halloween comes again in this crazy Year, let's look at some less-celebrated Specials.

Sorry, Charlie Brown and Tim Curry, you're not on this list...

Honorary Mentions: Lois & Clark, MacGyver, Galactica 1980, The Greatest American Hero, Thirtysomething,  Davey and Goliath, Quantum Leap, The Smurfs and Lassie

10. Dracula Meets...The Flintstones?!?: Considering everyone that they met, I guess this shouldn't be a surprise.

In between the original run and its revival in many forms (like The Flinstones Kids), this 1979 TV Special introduced two classic Monsters- Count Rockula and Frankenstone('s Monster).  Rock puns!  To add to the Halloween spirit, Ted Cassidy (Lurch from The Addams Family TV Show) voiced the latter creature.

9. Dinosaurs practice Samhain?!?: Not the...logical choice.

A Halloween Episode of ABC's Dinosaurs.  Do I *really* need to say more?

8. How do you Trick or Treat with those Stilt Houses?: Is it the future or the past?

The Jetsons also had a Halloween Episode and it came in the Revival time.  See- we wouldn't have this without #10.

7. A Small Haunting: I love this Show, despite of (or because of) how silly it is.

While there are many to highlight (and I will one day), this one features Vickie moving stuff around the House at night, so they think that there's a ghost.  Why not?

6. Halloween Gets a ReBoot: Digital gh-gh-ghosts?!?

This classic CGI-Animated Show from my youth also did a Horror Episode.  It featured parodies of Ash from The Evil Dead, Thriller (not A Cruel Picture), Zombie Films and Elvira.  

Groovy!

5. Where in the World is...Halloween?!?: Well, they had a Christmas Episode, so...sure.

In this Halloween-themed Episode, they chase Carmen Sandiego, learn about Halloween and get tricked.  

They also mispronounce Samhain!  It is not pronounced phonetically!  You're the Show that is supposed to be teaching kids!

4. The Ultimate in obscure Crossovers: Spider-Man sure loved to interact with other Characters!

As part of the Ultimate Spider-Man run, the Show had a crossover with Jesse, a Disney Channel Show that was, well, live-action.  Ignoring that, you get magic, a dragon and a Character Arc for...Jesse.

3. Extreme Dinosaurs vs. Pumpkins and...Kindness?!?: If you have so many Episodes, it had to happen.

In this odd Episode, the Raptors plan to release a 'kindness' gas through the use of Jack-O-Lanterns.  Our Heroes get it first and now won't fight.  So, the lesson, you see, is that you need to be angry and pissed off to save the day.

And yes, TWO Shows about Dinosaurs made the list.

2. To Boldly Go...Haunting?: No actual Halloween, but it was released on the day of (in 1967).

This Episode of the original Star Trek features all sorts of Horror Cliches like a Castle, a cat and more.  As a bonus, it was Written by Psycho Author Robert Bloch.

Said Episode was delayed (and released as Episode 7) to air on the Holiday, even though Chekhov's first appearance is supposed to be here.

1. Superboy vs. Lots of Monsters: I couldn't narrow it down to just one.

Superboy was a Syndicated Show that ran for 4 Seasons.  Aside from adapting classic villains like Metallo and Bizarro, they featured supernatural threats on four occasions.  Two of them feature Vampires, while another features a Werewolf.  The last one features Ghosts!

And you thought Smallville was weird for featuring Witches and Vampires.
I mean, it was...but you get the idea.

So those are some Halloween Episodes/Specials that might surprise you by existing.

Got more that I missed?  Leave a comment.

4,300th Post Celebration!: Fiction vs. Fiction- World War Z

 As I've hit another number milestone, I might as well put together another Banner!

For this anniversary, we return to a Series that I should do more of- Fiction vs. Fiction!

This time, I finally get around to comparing a Book I've meant to talk about for a while.
With this being October, it seems as good a time as any.

One is a popular Book.
The other is a Film that...well, exists and may get a Sequel...maybe...who knows.

Let's flip some Pages/DVD Menus and see what we've got!

***VS***

What's the Same?

Zombies.
They attack everywhere.
People fight them.

That's about it!

What's the Different?

Where to begin?

The Film tells the focused tale of a man- Brad Pitt- who goes around the World trying to find out why Zombies be attacking yo.

Since it is a Film, he always goes right when something bad is about to happen.

Brad Pitt is not in the Book.
In fact, the way the Story is told is not even close to the Book.

In it, we hear from dozens of people who fought/escaped the Zombie Uprising, War and Resettlement.

Yep, it all happened in the past and is retold by Survivors.
Slight difference!

There's also nothing like *most* of the big Set Pieces in the Film either.

The Book does have many Action Scenes in it and you get some great scares as well.
It is just told in the *Past Tense,* that's all.

Across the Stories, we get to hear about single people surviving alone, big military battles and everything in-between.

Final Thoughts:

The Book is really nothing like the Film, other than the fact that they both involve a world-wide Zombie Apocalypse.

In fact, there's a running Theme throughout it that the 'Heroes' of the War aren't really what they are cracked up to be OR their stories are fake.

The Film is all about one Hero solving everything.
It would almost help if the Film was like one of the fictional Films made about the War that are mentioned in the Book a few times.

It's not.

If you like the Film, that's cool.  It's not World War Z though.
Same for the Game (that suddenly appeared 6 years later).

The Book would make a GREAT TV Show for HBO Max or Hulu or (if they're desperate) Apple TV.
Make the Show already!

I should also note that this Book spun off from another one, but that didn't get a Film (yet).

They aren't alike.  Like one or the other- big whoop.

As for me, I pick the Book.

'00s Trash: Spiders (2000)

 What is scarier than Spiders?  Okay, sure, Vampires are.  Werewolves- yes, also scarier.  Mummies- granted.  Look- this is just an intro- stop giving suggestions!  This is Spiders, a Sci-Fi Horror Film from 2000.  Ah, good times.  Man, remember when Donald Trump was just that asshole who appeared in Home Alone 2: Lost in New York?  Of course, I was also still in High School, so things weren't perfect.  This is when we started to get lots of Direct-to-Video Films about Monsters and the like.  A Film about Spiders should have been expected.  The people in charge of making Films took a break from giant snakes to do one about this kind of creature.  So I guess there's no mystery what a Film about Spiders is about, huh?  Notable names in the Credits include a name I didn't expect to see again- Boaz Davidson.  Firstly, Boaz?  Your Parents couldn't go with something less obscure like Methuselah?   Secondly, he is notable for writing the last Film released by Canon Films- American Cyborg: Steel Warrior.  He also wrote a ton of Films like this, from Mansquito to  SharkMan to, well, Snakeman.  Boaz was all about the animal-human hybrids!  He's an old hand at Canon, even writing Lemon Popsicle, the Film they remade as The Last American Virgin (minus all that stuff about Tel Aviv).  Its Director apparently has it out for me, as he has Directed a number of bad Films I've covered- Boogeyman 3, Ballistica, Axe Giant: The Legend of Paul Bunyan and Planet Raptor.  I haven't seen some of these Films in almost 10 years, so retroactive DAMN YOU!!!! to Mr. Gary Jones.  Let's just stop recycling IMDB facts and web up this mess...

A young Reporter wants to cover the big stories...like Aliens.  If only there had been a Show for people like her back in 2000.

She gets her story as a Shuttle crashes right by where she's at- so convenient!

She breaks into the Base with her two friends, which is remarkably-easy.

It turns out that they were doing experiments on the ship when they were hit by a solar flare.

The people at the Base cover up the incident by saying that the Shuttle burned up.

The ship is blown up- Cool Guys Don't Look at Explosions Cliche- and the bodies are taken in.

The one survivor has some, well, gross changes take place...

The newly-hatched Spider (finally!) attacks some Guards and unfortunately takes out our Heroine's friends in the process.

Meanwhile, the evil Boss and his Sidekick try to keep things going, but it gets harder.

The Spider- wait, there are supposed to be more than one, right?- attacks the Boss, seemingly-killing him, and the Sidekick takes a turn to the good side.

He helps our Heroine escape the Base and they drive back to the College...

...where the Boss confronts them.

He seems to still be normal, but eventually transforms...

...into a fairly-unconvincing CGI creation.

Aw, you looked alright when you were a Practical Effect!

It all sets up a fun, but silly climax.

Lots of people get attacked by the sometimes-CGI/sometimes-practical f/x creature.

It ends at night with our Heroine blowing up the monster from a Helicopter.

Remember when she was just a College Reporter 80 minutes ago?  The End.

A pretty forgettable, but sometimes good Film.  Let's be honest- this Film is Direct-to-Video.  This Film is cheap.  This Film is called Spiders.  There's a certain bar to grade Films like this on.  Do you compare it to Big-Budget Hollywood fare?  No.  Is the Film fun?  Often, yes.  They give you a pretty simple Plot- sci-fi stuff makes a giant Spider- and delivers.  It doesn't take long to get started and the whole thing builds nicely.  We get a bigger-than-normal-but-not-giant Spider and it grows to be a big guy.  There's a nice bit of misdirection as the pair escape...only to be attacked by a new Spider.  The idea that she goes from Reporter who will do anything to chase a lead to firing an RPG from a Helicopter is pretty damn ridiculous.  She turns into Jean McClane!  I can actually believe the guy with the Military Background flying the Helicopter, but her being an Action Heroine- not so much.  The Special Effects are actually quite decent here.  Of course, Greg (or Gregory) Nicotero was on board for this, so I guess that explains it.  If you are looking for kind-of-silly, low-budget Creature Feature fun, you can do worse and better than Spiders.  What do you think, Not Quite Willem Dafoe?

Next up, the first Sequel that hopes to up the ante.  Will we actually get multiple Spiders in this one?  Stay tuned...

New Streaming: 'The Boys'- 'We Gotta Go Now'

 As we work our way to the Season 2 Finale later than many, let's see what fresh insanity we'll get on...

In the wake of recent events, Butcher wants nothing more than to disappear.

What better place than the Suburbs?

Homelander would probably like to disappear too after a video emerges of him killing a Supe Terrrorist...and the innocent man behind him.

He doesn't care about the loss of life- he cares about being 9 points down in Polling!

Close to disappearing is Black Noir, who is hiding after tracking Butcher.

He's not going to make things easy...

Will the events of the Episode break Homelander...or make him stronger than ever?

To find out the answer to that and many other questions, watch the Episode.

A bit of violence and depravity for the whole family.  Well, maybe not the kids...or squeamish Adults.  I'm not sure that any Episode doesn't feature a violent death so far and this one is no exception.  There are many big moments here and I obviously don't want to SPOIL them.  I will just say that ending is...active and violent in a different kind of way.  The Show always does a great job of parallel structure for events.  So, for instance, you see the danger of Homelander's eye beams in the 'viral video' and you later see a different reaction at the end.  They manage to keep so many moving parts in motion too, which is what a good Showrunner can do.  As I've mentioned before, some Shows can do this, but at the cost of plot momentum.  They nail a good balance here- kudos.  You always get a crazy moment or two, lots of Plot Points and a new revelation to keep things exciting.  I'm impressed that they can keep this up in the home stretch.  Hopefully, they can stick the landing, unlike the Snyder/Whedon Justice League Film that they keep referencing...

Next time, a power couple, a secret mission and lots of backstory.  Also lots of death.  See you then...

'70s Trash: Bog (1979)

I guess the term 'bog standard' isn't a compliment based on this Film.  This is Bog, a 1979 Horror Film that was one of the many Creature Features of this time.  Thanks for reviving the Subgenre, Jaws!   Yes, after that all-time Classic, we got alot of Films about giant Monsters, the likes of which hadn't been so popular since the 1950s.  It is fitting then that this Film feels like a throwback to those Films in all but the positive ways.  There's a charm to those Movies.  They talk about nonsense like it means something.  There's always exactly ONE Lady Scientist, who usually ends up more in peril than in control.  There's a big showdown with the creature.  The creature almost undoubtedly looks silly- unless Ray Harryhausen was involved- and it is vanquished...or is it?  You get most of that with this Movie.  Why does it feel so old for its time, but also outdated in 2020?  With all of the '50s trappings, the Film feels very '70s.  You have macho men with mustaches, big-ass cars and lots of drunk hillbillies/rednecks.  Bog comes to us from Don Keeslar- who just died in August at age 90- and it is about the only thing he did in Hollywood it seems.  His only other Directing Credit comes from a 1982 TV Movie featuring Grizzly Adams- i'll probably skip that one.  If you want Star Power, you get...Aldo Ray.  Woo-hoo?  All jokes aside, this could be trashy fun?  Is it?  Let's see...

In a Cold Open, a guy fishing with Dynamite is killed by a creature.  No...stop...don't.

After that, a pair of guys drag their wives down to watch them fish.
Said creature attacks again and kills...one of the wives?

Huh?

I thought for sure the guy would get it.

Now the other Wife gets it, in a shot that implies the creature is some sort of giant.
It's not.

The Sheriff- Ray- is tasked with stopping the deaths, but he's wary of this monster business.

Naturally, in Film Cliche #27, the Town is all-in from the get-go.

The Husbands are met by a local weirdo who tells them who to speak to- the old crone in the Forest.  Naturally!

She is undisturbed by the creature, who suddenly shows up, but the weirdo runs outside immediately to die.  Dumbass.

Now the Husbands know that the creature is dangerous and that they can stop it.

Yeah, they both die not long after that.

You thought the people we built up in Act 1 were the Heroes?  Ha!

Carl Kitt only wrote 2 Movies, so this might be one of the reasons why.

No, the actual Heroes are this Doctor- left- and this Scientist- right- who have to solve the mystery.  They are about as exciting as the pair in The Giant Spider Invasion.

Unlike that Film, we get precious Screen Time wasted on their love story, complete with Theme Song.

After enough people get killed, they call in two Divers.  In the vein of Bermuda Triangle, we get people we don't want to see in wetsuits get squeezed into wetsuits.

They find...a bunch of bottles melted together?

Oh, it is supposed to be an egg cluster.

They eventually figure out how to subdue the creature with some sort of foam.  Way to make it look dirty, Film.

In a curious decision, they first kill off Ray during this bit.  Weird.

Secondly, the creature escapes and we learn that it used a female as a Host to help it lay eggs.  That was the crone, but she's dead.

They save the lady Scientist- see what I said earlier- and the day is saved.  Or is it?!?

It's been 41 years, so I'm leaning towards 'yes.'

--------

It is a fun Film...to make fun of.  Is it good?  Not really.  It tries at times.  They clearly spent some time thinking up some theoretically-interesting ideas for the creature.  'What if it had a needle for its hand?'  That does lead to my favorite line- 'This may sound crazy, but could we have a Dracula out there?'  Someone wrote that, folks!  I should note that one of the Actors- Leo Gordon- has 34 Writing Credits, as opposed to Carl Kitt's 2.  He wrote The Wasp Woman, Attack of the Giant Leeches and The Terror.  I'm not sure why he wrote so many Public Domain Films.  The whole thing looks and feels pretty cheap.  You don't see the Monster outside of POV until the big moment where they hose it down like a dirty car.  In their defense, the Monster looks ridiculous, so they made the right call.  Stuck with a bad Suit- don't show it.  You could try to make it look better, but...nah.  I do love the part where the Deputy stops people from trying to catch the Monster.  I'm glad we get that Scene at least 3x.  Bog is not a good Film.  It can be fun to watch as a 'So Bad It's Good' Movie if one was so inclined.  I'll leave you with the double whammy of the '?' Ending and the Disney Font...

Next up, I dig into a trio of Creature Features.  What has 8 legs and 2 Sequels?  Stay tuned...

'90s Class: The Witches (1990)

 What's old is remade again.  This is The Witches, a 1990 Film that was designed for kids, but scared too many.  It is important to remember that its Director- Nicolas Roeg- actually CUT Scenes that he found to be too scary.  Considering what stayed in, you have to wonder!  The big names related to the Film- Jim Henson and Roald Dahl- also share an eerie connection- they both died in 1990, the year of this Film's release.  Coincidence?  Yes.  Still strange?  Yes.  Considering that the Film is about Witches and their magic curses, you can see why the random whims of fate seem like something more.  Moving away from that, the Film is notable for its freaky effects and for Anjelica Huston.  At the time of shooting, she was dating Jack Nicholson, who himself was in a Film about Witches just a few years prior.  Obviously this is getting more attention now due to the Remake (which was dumped onto HBO Max due to the Pandemic).  Is it as freaky as you may remember?  To find out, read on...

The Film begins with a Grandma telling tales of Witches to her Grandson, who is visiting on Vacation.

While I never got to meet either of my Grandmothers, I'd like to think that they wouldn't freak me out like this!

Forgotten amongst all of the later Story is the Tale told about the little Girl who went missing and then seemingly reappeared in the family's painting.

Rather than keep remaking Films, why not cover stuff like this?  Seriously, a full-length version of this Story would be great!

The boy's parents die- off-screen- and he stays with Grandma.

Her stories prove to be apt warnings as he avoids a Witch one day...

After Grandma gets sick, they go to an English Resort on Vacation.

Unfortunately, the place is full up with ladies that have a big secret...

They are all Witches!

Dun dun...I mean, the Title is a clue, no.
Even so, take nothing away from that Jim Henson Creature/Make-Up work!

The Grand Witch- Huston- reveals her big plan- to turn all of England's children into mice and to get their Parents to kill them.  Children's Film!

They catch our young Hero and use the stuff on him!

The poor kid must join forces with another kid-turned-mouse to find out how to stop the Witches and reverse the curse.

Taking him to his Parents sure doesn't help!

In a bit of Mission: Impossible-style sneaking, the kid puts the formula in the Witches' soup and they all transform.  The Grand Witch turns especially-ugly!

The Hotel Staff kill them and the kid escapes...but he's still a mouse.

In the Book, the kid can't be saved and knows that he will likely die within 9 years.  So will Grandma though, so he's fine with that.

In the Film's ending, the Grand Witch's Assistant turns good and reverses the curse.  Sorry, Dahl- this is better.  The End.

A fun Film that is *probably* not for the whole family.  The idea here is good.  The execution here is good.  Someone put alot of work into this Film- no question.  You get freaky make-up for the Witches, as well as subtle digital effects like their purple-tinted eyes.  When the kid is transformed, they use a good mix of real mice and animatronic ones.  The transition is more obvious to adult me than it was kid me.  It is good work, but it doesn't *quite* get realistic enough.  I know that I'm nitpicking 30 year old effects- it's just how this works.  The overall Story isn't the best we get from Dahl, who is viewed pretty high by most Critics.  Just don't look to close into his personal beliefs or his interviews!  The Acting is good and the tone is overall fun.  It is interesting to see the weird tonal shifts throughout.  For instance, the bit with the first Witch trying to trick our Hero feels very creepy.  As the Film ends, it can't even keep it straight.  We are happy to see the good people rewarded...but then a bitter sweet shift as the kid is stuck as a mouse...and then back again to happy as the good Witch saves him.  I still like this ending, but it doesn't help the Film's confusing tone.  It feels like someone made a Kid's Film for Adults.  If that works for you (like it did me on this rewatch), then good.  Here's hoping the Remake lives up to this...

Next up, we go back the '70s with a Monster Movie.  With little Budget and little imagination, what do we get?  Stay tuned...