Mondo Bizarro's 2024 Year End Awards!

I really debated internally about making a Best of 2024 List.
Simply put, I still haven't seen MANY that make most of these Lists.

As such, why not do it a bit different and have some fun?

Instead of just 'Here's the Best Films,' I want to give Special Awards to each one that makes the cut.

Enjoy!

1) 'Thank You For NOT Being in The Dark Universe' Award

Winner- Abigail

This one is bizarre, violent and fun.  It's clearly a riff on Dracula's Daughter (a vastly underrated Universal Film).  It has been spared any of the world-building that would have come with being part of the Dark Universe.

No Russell Crowe Cameo?  Yes, please!

2) 'You've Still Got It!' Award

Winner- Furiosa

A great Film by a great Director.  Notably, a Director who's been working longer and more prolifically than his colleagues.

I don't know how many more like this Miller has in him, but I welcome them all!

3) 'This One Is Fun and I Make No Apologies' Award

Winner- Godzilla x Kong- The New Empire

Godzilla Minus One is great.  This one is also quite good.

This one is a pure Summer Blockbuster with big moments, good Writing, fun visuals and some neat ideas.  It can also exist in the same year as a Japanese Classic.

4) 'Striking the Right Balance Between Reverence and Fun' Award

Winner- Ghostbusters- Frozen Empire

I'm a big fan of all of the Ghostbusters Films.  Yes, all of them.
Afterlife was a very good Film too and really built up reverence towards the 2 Films.

This one is a nice balancing act between that and making a quirky Film that connects both generations of Characters.

5) 'Back in the Funky '70s' Award

Winner- Late Night with the Devil

On its own merits as a pseudo-Found Footage Film with a paranormal theme, it is quite good.

It gets extra points for fully committing to its 'Era' and all of that, making it feel extra real.

6) 'They Really Committed to the Premise' Award

Winner- In a Violent Nature

This one is a fascinating Film to study as it takes a singular premise- you only ever follow the killer- and commits to it.  No cheating really.

Said commitment will definitely turn off some people, as will the random spurts of horrific violence.

7) 'I Love Everything, But...That Choice' Award

Winner- Alien Romulus

Fede Alvarez and company delivered a really great Alien Film.  It fits into the timeline, does its own thing and still works in that sweet, sweet nostalgia.

As noted, I'm really put off by one choice...but the rest is really great.

8) 'All I Wanted and More!' Award

Winner- Deadpool and Wolverine

This Film is fun, violent, ridiculous, full of Cameos, introduces new Characters and sort of slots into the MCU.

On top of that, it also features a surprisingly deep performance from Hugh Jackman (not that Ryan Reynolds is a slouch).

9) 'The Most Burton Film of the Year' Award

Winner- Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

Tim Burton is a Director I tend to really like.  His early stuff- from Batman to Sleepy Hollow- is what I love.  Some of his choices later- like Planet of the Apes- less so.

With him stepping away from safe, Disney Films here, I'm excited again.

10) 'Do I Not Hate These Anymore?!?' Award

Winner- V/H/S Beyond

My general disdain for Found Footage Films should be obvious to anyone who's read a few of my Reviews- especially ones by the older, saltier version of me.

That said, I tend to find more that I like than don't in the recent V/H/S Films and this is no exception!

Let me close with an Honorable Mention for Madame Web.

It's not a Top 10 Film for any metric, but it's also not terrible and has more going on than Morbius did!

I do plan to catch up on many of the big or notable Films from 2024, but they won't be added here.

Tubi Thursday: Ape vs. Mecha Ape (2023)

 The Asylum is still going at it, no matter what we say to try and stop them.

Their Godzilla vs. Kong rip-off got a Sequel?  Well, the first one is not on Tubi, so hopefully I don't get lost with...

The Film wastes no time in revealing the titular Mecha Ape in its Cold Open.

Why it was covered in fur to be shot off for the reveal (in the actual Story) is anyone's guess.

It smashes some folks with zero context.

In Ape vs. Monster, a Chimp was mutated by Space Radiation and Alien DNA to grow huge.

Thankfully, that happened in time to fight Not Godzilla (who was a Space Alien...so Not Space Godzilla) in that one.

A few years later and now he's a Gorilla.

Sure- that happens.

Some vague foreign people want revenge on America for their dead son (so we're ripping off Godzilla: King of the Monsters now?).

Their plan involves stealing an old Nuke that is about to be decommissioned.

They take control of Mecha Ape via Computers (do you really care how it happens) and steal the nuke!

Will Tom Arnold shooting all of his Scenes in this one Office (presumably in the same day) help at all?!?

It all comes down to this- the giant Chimp-rilla vs. the Mecha Ape.

Chicago is in danger!
Will Berwyn be spared?!?

To find out, stream the Film now.

It is very forgettable.  I legit just watched it, but I'm struggling to tell you the Characters' names.  I remember Tom Arnold never leaving his Office Set (shades of Alan Hale Jr in The Giant Spider Invasion).  I remember the lady who talks like Natasha from Rocky & Bullwinkle.

I also remember the CGI.  It's a real mixed bag, let me tell you.  Specifically, it is a bag with one actual nut in it and a bunch of rusty screws.

The CGI for the Mecha Ape is actually good.  It's not great, but it is good.  The CGI for the Gori-mpanzee was not.  It was terrible.  I mean...you have eyes, right?  Look back at that thing.

The Plot is both busy and shallow.  There are so many moving parts, but they also don't do that much.  It is a weird critique, I know.  Can I just stick with King Kong Escapes instead?

The Film can be fun in bursts, but the actual battle between the titular Creatures is- unlike Godzilla vs. Kong- way too short and unmemorable.  Stay out of Downers Grove too, you big metal jerk!

Seriously, if Svengoolie's Studio was damaged in the melee, you'll be getting a nice one of these, fictional robot ape!

A barely passable Film that doesn't quite make as fun of a Bad Movie experience as you'd hope.  The Editing and Pacing just make it a drag, even with the titular battle.

Compare/Contrast: 'King Kong vs. Godzilla'- US Version to Japanese Version

 Awhile back, I re-watched the classic Toho Film that pit King Kong against Godzilla.
Of course, that was the US Version.

Let's compare and contrast...

and

Like the original Godzilla, there was a bit of a delay between the 2 Films coming out.  It's not like today where they just make a Subbed or Dubbed Version quickly- it was a Year.

Instead, a US Company 'made' a Version of the Film that became the predominant copy around the World.

Ishiro Honda was apparently not great about preserving the original copy, supposedly Editing from the Negative!

In 2019, the Criterion Collection Version featured a good copy of the Japanese Version.  Here's what's different...

The Japanese Version has this guy appear in the beginning (and never again) to start pushing the idea of picking sides in the fight.

In the US Version, this guy at the UN appears to brief us on Godzilla (figuring that we'd all forgotten about the last 2 Films released in the US just a few years earlier) and King Kong (who was last seen in a US re-release in 1952).

In a weird addition, they will sometimes mention and show an 'International Space Station' (that has no bearing on the Plot).

It is Stock Footage from The Mysterians, a different Toho Film.  Weird.

Oh and this guys pops up WAY TOO MANY TIMES.

Him and another guy (some sort of Science Expert) pop up between big Scenes to explain what is happening, since I guess they think the American Kids are too dumb.

They even show up at the Finale to tell us about Kong swimming away...which is on-screen.

There's also one Scene which is played straight- in which one of the Characters is nervous about catching Kong- that is then re-dubbed comedically to have him 'complain about the corns on his feet.'
Huh?

The Soundtrack was also replaced with lots of good (but stock) Music from Universal Films like The Creature from the Black Lagoon and others.  Necessary?

They also cut Scenes of people betting on the fight.  Why?

Lastly, for the finale, they didn't think that there was enough going on, so they inserted disaster footage from, again, The Mysterians to heighten things.

Lastly, the final shot has Kong swimming away, while Godzilla is absent.  
In the Japanese Version, we hear both roars to end the Film.
In the American Version, we only hear Kong's.  I guess 'our guy' won more?

***

The American Version- the predominant version even in 2021- sure is different, huh?

Were these changes necessary?  No.
Were they all bad?  I guess not.
Should you check out the Japanese Version?  Yes.

Immediate Response: Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

 Well, I went to a Theater for the first time in, what, a year?  Dang.

The secret- go on a Wednesday afternoon.  You'll have plenty of space for Social Distancing.

The Good

* The Film delivers big action on all fronts, with Godzilla blasting and Kong smashing!

* The human element is underplayed here, giving more focus to the titular

* The Plot manages to have some nice surprises that *aren't* SPOILED in the Trailers and the execution is solid.

* The Film focuses on the creatures and, as such, shows us little people in comparison to them any time that both are on-screen.

The Bad

* The balance of the two Plots- one focusing on Kong and one on Godzilla/Apex- is sometimes uneven.  It's never really bad, but not quite right.

* For the 'leading man,' Godzilla vanishes for a bit in the middle of the Film.

* A few human characters- like Lance Reddick's and Kyle Chandler's- get bugger all to do.  Oh well.

As a whole, the Film delivered a good Plot, big Action and a focus where it should be.
If you're a fan of these kinds of Films, see it how you choose to.

For me, my home TV was just not the right medium and I found a safe venue.

Forgotten Sequels: King Kong Lives (1986)

 After 10 years, is there any reason to go back to the Ape?  This is King Kong Lives, a 1986 Sequel to the infamous Dino De Laurentis Remake.  Why did it take so long?  I don't know.  The idea of doing a second King Kong Film has always been a tricky one.  We got one with Son of Kong in the same year as the classic original Film and it's...odd.  The poor little guy shows up way too late, acts goofy and then dies.  The next time we got one, it was King Kong Escapes, the follow-up to King Kong vs. Godzilla by Toho.  It features a Doctor Who- a mad Scientist- and a robot Kong!  What do we get this time?  Kong has survived the bullet wounds and massive fall.  10 years later, he's back when a lady Kong- not called Queen Kong due to that already being taken.  If you want returning Leads, well, screw you!  Instead, we get Linda Hamilton between Terminator Films and recurring TV Actor Brian Kerwin.  We get the Director of such Classics as Shaft in Africa, Sheena (Queen of the Jungle) and...the last King Kong Film.  This time, they didn't heavily-promote a giant, 'life-sized' Kong robot that didn't work.  Nope- it's just a bloke in a suit.  To find out why you may not care to remember this, read on...

So I lied a bit earlier.

The original Film's Cast does appear...in reused footage from the 1976 Film to recap it.
I bet they didn't pay them for this...

10 years later, Kong is alive...somehow.  It's important to note what won't kill him at this point for later.

For some reason, they were keeping him alive for all of this time.  I guess Science.

In Borneo, a man finds another Kong, only it is a Lady Kong.  He captures it with relative ease.

As for why it is not Skull Island, there's a throwaway line about them being 'adjacent' or something.

In America, the Scientists pay him for the Lady Kong, since they need a blood transfusion to do the operation.

Fun Fact: the Actor in the middle got a residual check of, no joke, 13 cents for this Film.  He stuck it to his copy of the Poster on the wall.

They do the transplant with minimal drama and now have to decide how to handle 2 Kongs.

They keep one in a Facility a mile away until a full habitat is built.  So, I guess Wyoming?

Naturally, King Kong escapes after some vague amount of time, attacks the Facility and rescues his Lady (Kong).

'It sure was easier carrying the last girl,' Kong must think!

Linda Hamilton and the Hunter team up to try and keep the Kongs safe from the Military.

While there, they hook up.

Unfortunately, the Military finds them all, gasses Lady Kong and takes her.  Said gas is strong enough to knock out a 50-foot Ape but, as people point out, it seems to not affect the Soldiers!

Kong escapes via a river and regains his strength- stopping to kill some rednecks along the way.

He somehow surprise-attacks the Base and rescues Lady Kong, but at what cost?

Lady Kong gives birth in a Barn during the final battle and a baby is born.

Kong dies, but his family lives on...to thankfully not make another Sequel.  The End.

A pretty silly and faux-serious Film.  The Film seems to have high ambitions.  It wants you to feel for the Kongs.  It wants you to hope for them to succeed.  Oddly, it wants you to hate the Military, at least in this Story's context.  I guess I'm just too used to Michael Bay's Recruitment/Transformer Films.  One can make some parallels between this Film's bad guy General and the one played by Samuel L. Jackson in Skull Island.  Jackson is better and feels more 'unwound' in that one, but it is still a comparison all the same.  The big problem here is the Effects.  While the Kong suits look fine, they never make you believe that you're watching anything other than 2 people in Suits.  Hell, the top-billed Actors in the Credits are the people in said Suits!  It should be noted that Lady Kong's facial work is a bit...iffy at times (see above).  Carlo Rambaldi is back doing the Suit Work here and it's not bad...but also not great.  All of the shots that are supposed to imply scale rarely work.  I'm never 'drawn in' by the Effects.  There are also some silly ones, like the bit I'm highlighting below.  In it, Kong is shown eating Alligators, but the one time we see one properly in his hand, it is clearly a baby Alligator.  Oy vey!  If the Effects work, this could be a decent Film.  As it is, it is a Film that is treated 100% seriously and tries...but fails.  It was nominated for Worst Effects in the Razzies, but only in that Category.  That kind of says it all- bad Effects sink this one.

Next time, another '80s Film with a weird combination of Genres in play.  Will an older Space Mummy Film be more fulfilling?  Stay tuned...

Lost In Translation?: King Kong (1976)

Dino's infamous Remake speaks for itself.

He promised a fully-realized Kong via life-sized robot.

It didn't happen.

Regardless, people didn't know this in other Countries when they were trying to promote the upcoming Film.

See what the lovely folks over in Asia got...

That's...one awkward Poster to look at now.

Yes, he does climb the World Trade Center in the Film.
Yes, it was about 20 years before the first attack on said Building.

That awkwardness aside, it is an odd point to pick for the Poster.  Why not him on top?

It seems odd to get him like halfway up, especially since this isn't a shot from the Film that they used.  They actively chose to pick this moment and make a detailed drawing/painting for it.

Odd.

Here's the original...

Not bad, but it needed a little bit of love.  I got ya, Kong!

Lost in Translation?: Kong- Skull Island

As we get hyped for what the next Godzilla Film will bring and think about what the Crossover Film will bring in 2020, let's look back at what started the real push.

Kong's first solo Film in over a Decade was a big hit.

Let's see how Asia decided to market it...

Damn!  That is one bad-ass Poster!

I mean...damn.

As always, here's the original...

I added a splash of color on the front and some sharpening to add some depth.  It doesn't look 3-D enough if it is all flat, after all.

Quick Reviews: Kong- Skull Island

After all the seeming backfire to Universal's launch of The Dark Universe, let's look at a slightly-better attempt from Warner Bros....

A mysterious group named Monarch (Shared Universe Trope #4) piggybacks on a mission to Skull Island.

Along for the ride are Scientists, Soldiers, a lady Photographer and...Almost Ryan Gosling.

They show up and drop some bombs- in the name of Science!

This pisses off Kong, as it would.  Chaos ensues.

Sam Jackson gets recapped on the real point of the mission.  Isn't that usually what HE does?

They meet the guy from the beginning bit and he's somewhere between Robin Williams in Jumanji and Tom Hanks in Cast Away.

Why does this Film retrofit Plot Points from Savage Beach?

The titular Island is chock full of all sorts of crazy monsters and big-ass creatures.  Fun!

Can our Heroes survive to tell their tales?  Will Kong live to fight Godzilla in a few years?

To find out, watch the Film.

A good Kong- it has been awhile.  While many are torn on whether or not to like Jackson's Kong- I love it and own it-, there should be less division here.  For starters, this is not a straight, albeit expanded, Remake.  This acts the first Film in a Series without just being the same tale.  That's possible apparently!  I shouldn't have to say this like it is some big deal...but it kind of is.  The Story is a pretty simple one, but they do give it a few wrinkles.  You could argue that there are maybe too many Characters, but they do need someone to die at the hands of giant CG Monsters.  Without SPOILERS, I will say that the way they handle Kong is pretty interesting.  It seems more villainous at first, but you see other sides of it by the end.  That said, it does have the ability to somehow sneak up on people.  It also must have really tiny or non-existent genitals, as there is no way that they shouldn't be visible- not that I really *want* that.  He's still better than Ken Doll Doomsday though.  All in all, Kong: Skull Island is a good, somewhat deep Adventure Film.  You could always do worse kick-starting your Shared Universe.  Speaking of shared, how about this homage to King Kong vs. Godzilla?

Much less disappointing than 2014's Godzilla, this one worked for me.  The question is how the whole Franchise thing will work.

Lost in Translation: King Kong

After picking on Japan so much lately, I decided to turn my attention to Spain for a week.  This is their attempt at marketing one of the most iconic films of the 1930s- King Kong...

Well, it's certainly unique.  It retains all the racism of the film, while also giving you no background to the picture or any clue that it's about an ape.  That's...sure to sell tickets.  Seriously though, that's an odd use of perspective.

Next up, I return to picking on Poland with a pair of updates relating to a certain shark franchise.  It's going to bite!  Stay tuned...