Best and Weirdest of my Shudder Year: 2025

 Do I need to keep paying for Shudder?
Yes- I get plenty of joy from it.

Not every Film is great, but which ones stood out to me this Year?

Honorable Mentions: Urban Legend, Sputnik, Urban Legends: Final Cut, Mosquito, V/H/S Halloween, Good Boy, Wolfkin.

1) The Primevals: This one was not completed when it is was supposed to be released in 1993.

Thankfully, it got a release in 2023 and ended up here.

A fun, throwback Film in many ways that I'm glad has gotten its due.

2) Frankie Freako: A fun and silly Film inspired by '80s trash.

The Director of Psycho Goreman walks that line between homage and remake in a Film that it subjectively great.

3. Monster Island: Don't let the generic Title fool you- there's more going on here.

A simple tale- two disparate people stuck on an Island with a creature- has surprising depth and pathos.  Plus, the Monster rocks.

4. Dangerous Animals: A nice surprise, with a well-known Character Actor standing out.

A pretty simple tale, but one that works when you see how dangerous the villain looks.

5. Night of the Reaper: A fun Film that plays with conventions and cliches.

What sounds like a Film you've seen 100 times takes a few clever twists and turns.

6. The Vourdalak: A crazy French Film with a weird gimmick to boot.

This freaky Vampire Film features a very unique creature and a weird story.

7. Azrael: A grim, wordless tale that definitely stands out.

This Horror Film focuses on a single woman, has no dialog and its Plot is super vague.
It shouldn't work, but it mostly does.

8. Clown in a Cornfield: Another Slasher Film the wisely plays with conventions.

We've come around again to where we have new Scream Films and new Films have to subvert THOSE tropes.  This is a great example.

There you go- 8 recommendations for Films to watch, a reminder for you if you forget when I first posted this or, you know, don't watch them.

I won't know either way, so...go nuts.

Shudder Day: Wolfkin (2022)

 Busy weekends have left no time for Shudder.

Let's make up for lost time with a freaky French Film...again.

This one is lupine.

In a Cold Open (in more ways than one), a lady is dumped by her boyfriend when he can tell that she's pregnant.

She apparently never sees him again and is now going to have to raise that kid...

As a Chef, whose life is even less glamorous than The Bear makes it out to be.

He Son is starting to act strange, apparently scratching one kid and then biting another.

What can she do?

How about her supportive Boyfriend?  Can he help.

This is a Horror Film- a French one at that!- so you know that won't work.

No SPOILER, but you know that something bad will happen to this poor guy at some point, don't you?

Desperate, she tracks down the bebe papa's Parents for help.

The Dad- who looks like French David Lynch- and Mom haven't seen her former lover either, but will help her with the kid.

Of course, there's lots of strange goings on at the House in short order.

The kid acts up.
The kid is put back down in strange ways.

The kid is told that he can't hunt with Grandpa.
The kid sneaks out with him anyhow.

The kid seems to be changed by the experience.

Is it the people?
Is it the place?
Is it something he ate?

Can she save her Son from himself?

Will the actual Title- Communion- factor into the Plot?

To find out, stream it now.

A good Film, even if it is really dreary and bleak.  Don't watch a Film like this after a long, hard day unless you're in the mood for even less pleasantness!

That said, the Film is well done.
I can appreciate a Film, even if it isn't my usual taste.

The Film presents a solid Heroine, a tough situation and even tougher solutions.  How far could you go for your kid?
How do you know which solution is right?
What if being nice and good won't fix things?

This is one of those Film that demands you pay attention to spot little details, from a look by the Maid to a throwaway line in the first 20 minutes that really factors into the 3rd Act.

I won't SPOIL things (more than the Poster sort of does), but you do eventually get some of that action you're looking for.  The Plot always comes first.

Wolfkin is a treat for people who like the darker, more complex Horror Films that don't pull their punches.  If that's your thing, France is your Country!

A Film that is bleak, sometimes tough to watch and damn good.  I'm in no rush to watch it and feel a bit depressed again anytime soon, but I don't regret picking it.

Shudder Day: The Vourdalak (2024)

I didn't get around to seeing Nosferatu yet.

In lieu of that, here's a freaky French Vampire Film.  Mon dieu!

Long ago, a man who's an Emissary for the King of France runs into trouble.

Off-camera, he's robbed and left alone in a foreign land.

A strange man tells him to go to a House down the road into the Forest.

He runs across a strange woman and follows her to her House.

He tries to woo her while the rest of the Family waits for the Patriarch of the Family to arrive.

Can he get into her pantaloons?

The Father arrives and...he's something.

I won't SPOIL what's up with him other than the fact that he's a form of Vampire.

To find out how the rest of his stay goes, stream the Film now.

A very strange Film- no question.

To be fair, it is a Period Piece Horror Film from France about a Vampire.

That's plenty of odd things together.

The best way I could describe this one is that it feels similar to a Jean Rollin Film.
That will probably tell you whether you're going to like it or not.

It is a tonally strange Film, alternating from Drama to Absurdist Comedy to Horror and then back again.

I won't SPOIL the effects used for the Vampire other than to tell you two things- it is freaky and I love it.

Will this one be for everyone?
Absolutely not.

Do I regret giving it a watch?
Absolument pas.

A strange, very French Film about another fringe kind of Vampire.  It's just not going to be for everyone- just like escargot.  

Tubi Thursday: Dracula Reborn (2015)

 I almost want to apologize to last week's Movie.  It could have been worse.

Let's see what this Film with the same name does worse.

A random, hooded man attacks a woman under a bridge.  He drains her blood.  Slowly.

What is going on?

Well, in classic Tell, Don't Show, we learn that Dracula (usually spelled as 'Drakula' in the Subtitles and Captions) is a) Real, b) a Cult Leader and c) behind a series of murders.

Despite how serious and grounded the Film tries to be, this is Dracula/Drakula.

The Film is basically these sections mixed up and drawn out...

Our Heroes sit around and discuss the secret codes/cyphers

A random Vampire lunges at, bites and drains someone for about 5 minutes.

Random shots of Paris.

People talking about nothing.

At least they use CG and real (fake) blood effects.

As a bonus, our Cast appears to speak English as their 2nd language- at best- so the Dialog sounds even less lifelike than it should.

Granted- I'd sound terrible acting in French...so I wouldn't do it (either thing)

Not David Duchovny agrees to take out Heroes to Transylvania for $10,000 to find Drac/Drak.

When they go to his home territory, will things go well?

I mean, he's been killing them in Paris, so...no.

Oy vey!  This one is slow.  This one is dull.

I think they wanted it to seem 'gritty and realistic.'  It is just plain dull.

Again- the Acting and Dialog aren't great.  I don't 100% blame the Actors.  The Writer is not helping here either.

I don't like to be the 'f**k this Movie' guy- honestly.
That said, this one is so boring, so drawn out and just plain pointless.

Plus, this is the Title...so yeah, 'f**k this Movie.'

A Film by a man with a very prolific Filmography.  That said, it was as an Assistant Cameraman and not a Director...which shows.

Tubi Thursday: The Night Eats the World (2018)

 After dissecting the hell out of its many Posters, I should check out the Film.

That was a bad idea...but it was MY bad idea...dammit.

A man goes to see his newly-ex-girlfriend at their old Apartment to get his stuff.

He keeps bugging her during a party until he locks himself in a room and falls asleep.

He wakes up in the morning to hear some weird noises and see the place empty...save for lots of blood.

Oh shit- Zombies!

Don't get too scared- he now has to spend the rest of the Film just kind of hanging out and trying not to go crazy.

He's even got his own Swiss Army Man (or is he Ed?).

So we get to watch him do some smart things- like try to make companionship-, some familiar things- buckets on the roof of the building to collect rainwater- and some really stupid things- like shoot first and ask questions never.

To find out how this Film ends, stream the Film now.

Not a meal, but a night snack.  Oh right- it's French.

If you want to see an Amuse Bouche in Film form, this is it.  Now just imagine that someone served this as your Entree and expected you to like it.

There's a good idea here- to an extent.

The idea that this guy has to adapt to life trapped in this Building- fine. 
The fact that he does this alone (save for one bit)- less fine. 
The fact that nothing really happens in 90 minutes- not good.

I guess this kind of thing is a European idea, as I watched a German Film in 2011 that is quite similar.  That one sucked too.

This could have worked.  Instead, I found myself yearning for something more interesting...

A slow, ponderous Film that feels like you took the first 20-30 minutes of a Film and made it the whole thing.  There's so little progression that it is just hard to care.

Five (Sometimes Obscure) Films to be Thankful For

 Thanksgiving is all about giving thanks.
That and Turkey.
And...Stuffing.
And that weird canned Cranberry Sauce.

How about we give Thanks for Movies that don't get enough praise for what they did?
Let's do that now...

1) Blood and Black Lace (1964)- Creating Slasher Films

Mario Bava's 1964 Classic a Murder Mystery involving Fashion Models being killed by a masked man.  You get stylish stabbing and a general vibe that would inspire a number of Giallo Films.
Those, in turn, would inspire Films like Halloween and...well, you get the rest.

2) The Shadow Strikes (1937)- The First Superhero Film

Marvel and DC are fighting over who can make the most money.  Well, they owe it all to this Film.

Okay, that's probably not true, but it was the first Film in the Genre, so...you're welcome.

3) Nosferatu (1922)- The First Vampire Film

This isn't exactly the most obscure one, but its historical importance is key.
It is the first Vampire Film, beating Vampyr in 1923 and the official adaptation in 1931.

It is also the first 'Mockbuster,' inspiring such Asylum Classics as Atlantic Rim and Snakes on a Train.

4) Westworld (1973)- The first full CGI Shots

While people will usually go right to Young Sherlock Holmes for this, as it features the first fully CGI Character.

That said, you have to learn to walk before you can run and the fully-CGI shots of Brenner's perspective in the Film are very important.

5) The House of the Devil (1896)- The First Horror Film

Melies was a groundbreaker in many ways and Edison stole his glory (and profits)..

Before your Grandparents (or possibly even Great Grandparents) were born, however, he was making this (short) Horror Film before Cinema was truly an Art Form.

There are many, many more Films to highlight and be thankful for.  

Watch yours today.

'60s Class: Barbarella (1968)

 Come for the curiosity, stay for the execution.  This is Barbarella, the 1968 Cult Classic featuring Jane Fonda in the Lead.  For starters, every release now seems to call it Barbarella: Queen of the Galaxy, which isn't remotely accurate.  The reason- a 1977 Re-release called it that...and cut the minor amount of nudity to capitalize on Star Wars.

Just a thought: Barbarella: Queen of the Stars would have been better, right?  Plus, it won't make people think of that softcore Emmanuelle stuff from the '90s.

The Film is based on a French Comic and Directed by a French man, so it has that certain je ne sais quoi.  It's also really weird.

The Plot involves the titular character being sent to recover a Scientist.  She's not ready for the danger, but she is ready to change costumes throughout the Film.

To see if she succeeds, read on...

Our Heroine begins the Film by stripping.  If only The Seventh Seal had been so daring!

She's sent by the President of Earth to retrieve Durand Durand, a Scientist who created a dangerous weapon.  Good luck!

To be fair to the Film, Barbarella has apparently only known peace, so she's not exactly equipped for a dangerous mission skillset-wise.

That said, she immediately crashes her ship, meets some children and is captured.  Yikes.

She's saved from some killer dolls- think Feisty Pets- by a guy who's job it is to capture the loose children.

He wants a simple reward- to have sex with her.  At least he's not forward!

She does so- on Earth, they do that fake psychic sex from Demolition Man- and goes to the Planet's lower levels...and she's immediately knocked out.

This does still pass the Bechdel Test, shockingly enough.

She's not captured this time, since it's Pygar, the Blind Angel (Space Mutiny's John Phillip Law).  She needs his help to get to the City, but he's lost the will to fly.

She has sex with him and that does it.  Yep.

They don't *immediately* get captured.  It takes a few minutes after their arrival for that to happen.

She's captured by the Black Queen and her Concierge.

Her punishment- having friendly-looking birds fly around her, which somehow shreds her outfit.

She's saved- again- by Dildano, the Leader of the Resistance.  He's David Hemmings (who I know from Deep Red) and he actually replaced the original Actor- Antonio Sabato Sr.- when he was 'too serious.'

She goes back...and is immediately-captured again.  Yep.

This leads to the infamous Scene where a pipe organ designed to make her um, enjoy herself to death is too weak to kill her.

In case you didn't guess, the Concierge is actually Durand Durand.  She's shocked by this, despite the being she was shown being 25 years old.  

He's not Paul Rudd- he's going to age in that time!

For some reason, she agrees to work with him...and is immediately-betrayed and left to die.

The whole Planet has a dark liquid call the Mathmos running underneath it, so Barbarella and the Queen free it to stop Durand Durand.

They float to the surface and are rescued by Pygar...before the Film just kind of stops.  Okay.  The End.

It's...weird.  It's very weird.  When your Director was supposedly drunk by Noon every day (according to Fonda), that might be a factor.  That or all of the just general drug usage in 1968.

The concept- Female Agent goes to crazy Planet on Mission- is fine.  I just wish they could agree on whether or not she's competent.  In one Scene, she trips over her own feet.  In another, she's doing precise laser shots to hit flying ships.  Pick one.

She's also inconsistent on what she knows.  She's shocked by the guy on the Alien Planet doesn't use the pills for Psychic Sex, but then tells another guy that 'it's only done by Earthlings.'  Did she learn or just forget?

The big draw of the Film is that it's definitely a great Time Capsule for the Period.  The lush colors, the strange vibe, all of the Rear Projection Effects and the barely-lucid Story are all of the time.  For better or worse (I choose better), it's of its time.

If you want to know why the Film looked so good (and weird), look to the Credits to see the Grandson of Auguste-Renoir- Claude- as the Cinematographer.

Next time, I jump from the height of artistic weirdness to something just plain dumb.  Killer Mushrooms are on the Menu!  See you then...

Lost in Translation: The Night Eats the World (2018)

 When we last 'met,' I talked about a 2018 Zombie Film made in France.

It *might* have ripped off a different Film that was just *set* in France.

So, I'm sure you're wondering the obvious...

What does the French Poster look like?

Red background- check.
Falling man- check.

Eiffel Tower- no check?!?

Yep, there's a French Poster for a French Film...and they apparently removed the Eiffel Tower!

Is there a Story here that I don't know?
The Film is set in Paris.

What.
The.
Hell?!?

As a bonus, I found a German Poster (which didn't bother to translate the Title) that's different still...

No red background.
No falling man.
No Eiffel Tower.

Was ist die Geschichte hier?

Oddly-Familiar Cover Art: The Night Eats the World

 Some time during the Holiday Haze, I was looking up Horror Films on various Streaming Sites and found a Poster that seemed...familiar.

See if you can tell what the 'inspiration' might be...

Paris- check.
Upside down World- check.
Red Background- check.

Figure it out?

Well, we go back to 2014 for...

So...yeah.

Granted- there are slight differences in the scope and scale of it.
Yes, they added the Zombie Hands Graphic (which feels like it was copied from some other Poster).

Given the year of this one (2018), am I wrong to think that they might have cribbed the 'falling upwards' visual from Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse?  
Is that a stretch?

Even so...come on.

Right?

Incidentally, there are other Versions of this Poster, but that's for a different Post.