Friday, December 16, 2016

Top Ten Disappointing Films of 2016

Alright, I might as well start doing these.  To note...

These are Films from 2016 that I reviewed.  I'll do a separate one on Films reviewed in 2016 that were from different times- be they 2015 or 1983.

These are ONLY ones that I've reviewed in some way, so some bad stuff may avoid being here by me avoiding a Review.  I'm looking at you Sniper: Special Ops.

To see any Reviews separately, just use the '2016' Tag.

10. Mark of the Witch: Interesting start, but then it just devolves into a Music Video thing for the next 20 minutes.  After that, there is no salvaging this Rob Zombie wannabe-Film.

9. Jeruzalem: While I don't like Found Footage Films per se, I always hope that they turn out to be good.  This one has a unique Setting and feel, but is just a big pile of cliche.  Switch out the Google Glass for the Camera and nothing changes.
8. She Kills: Bad Horror Comedy.  Just dumb.

7. Arrowhead: I almost picked Cyborg X, but that at least had some interesting Action.  This one just feels like someone's dense, unsold Sci-Fi Book turned into a Film.

6. Suicide Squad: To note- I expected Sinister Squad to suck, so no disappointment.  In this case, the Film made a ton of money, but is just a bizarre mish-mash of Stories, Tone and Action.
5. Space Cop: This is the antithesis of Kung Fury in pretty much every way.  Some of that is intentional- the Cop is fat and bad at his job-, but some of it isn't- it looks cheap, it isn't funny.  Such a letdown!

4. Phantasm- Ravager: After nearly 2 Decades, it had to be at least complete, right?  No, this one continues to leave things odd and open, despite no chance of a follow-up in the wake of Scrimm's death.  What a long-delayed mess.
3. Yoga Hosers: Sorry, Kevin.  I know what he was going for here and maybe it worked more for others.  As a long-time fan, it just felt dumb for dumb's sake and didn't do anything for me in the long run.

2. Swiss Army Man: I didn't get in on the hype.  First, it was talked about as some terrible mess.  Later, it became a Film that 'the cool people' liked.  For me, it was a Short Film that didn't work at 90 minutes.

1.Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice: Is it terrible?  No.  Is it unredeemable?  Not quite.  Should it have been 2 Films that were expanded on their own?  Yes.  Was it a disappointment after 50 years of build-up?  Hell yes.
I look forward to any blowback...although I doubt it will be from Arrowhead fans.  All 4 of you probably don't read the Site.

See you next List.

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