In Soviet Russia...: Black Lightning

He flies through the air with the greatest of flimsy pretenses!  Today's film comes from 2009 and is pretty much only marketed around the man who made it- Timbur Bekmambetov.  You know, the guy who made Wanted and whose name really pisses off Blogger's Spell Checker.  Although, that's not really the truth.  This film is marketed as by 'The Director of Wanted.'  In reality, it's a film by Dmitriy Kiselev.  This is not a total lie, mind you, as the man did do Second-Unit Direction on the film.  I say all this to get rid of the biggest lie surrounding the film itself which is...actually pretty good.  The plot is simple- it's Spider-Man.  The overall plot structure, course of events and even story turns are right out of Sam Raimi's film- with a dash of Spider-Man 2 and Iron Man in for spice.  Aside from being Russian, the film has another twist- it's also Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.  No, really.  The plot revolves around a teenager- ha!- finding a car that has the ability to fly.  Everything plays out in the course of events as Spider-Man though, complete with Mary Jane and Uncle Ben.  That said, I like Raimi's film and this one has some good moments to it as well.  To find out how this whole thing works, you'll just have to read on...

In 2004, a rich man is trying to get richer by mining for diamonds, but he needs a new power source for his drill.  They search for a device called the Nanocatalyst that will do this, but it was actually hidden in...

...a car, which is given to our Peter Parker substitute by his dad- not uncle.  With the Nanocatalyst, this car can...

...fly!  Needless to say, Dmitry (nice touch naming the lead after yourself, Director) is a bit shocked.  Jumping right to Spider-Man 2, our hero decides to use this miracle device to...do his job quicker.  You're so un-creative, kid!

Since this is Spider-Man, Uncle/Father Ben/Russian Name has to die!  The execution and pay-off of this is a bit different, but I won't SPOIL that.

Since this is still Spider-Man 2 as well, he saves a kid from a burning building.  Cue the 'Man on the Street Interviews' from Spider-Man, but sadly it lacks Lucy Lawless.  You can't have it all, I guess.

All the while, our hero pines for Mary-Jane/Nastya, who falls in and out and in and out of love with him throughout.  Will they end up together?  Is the sky blue?

With the evil villain seeking his Nanocatalyst and willing to kill for it, will our hero survive?  Will good triumph?  How exactly do they rip off Iron Man?  To find out...watch the movie.  It's on Streaming now, so you have no excuse.  The End.

Человек спайдера!  The plot of this movie is, as I said before, Spider-Man.  There is not a lot more to say about that.  There are some minor changes to the origin story and pacing throughout.  You can't ever get past the feeling of 'I saw this movie in 2002' though.  Aside from that, the acting is good, the Special Effects are fantastic and the overall feel is fun.  I would have liked to see more originality in the film itself, but I just think of this like how Turkey used to be in the '70s and '80s.  With a small market, their best bet was to rip-off American/European films that were already hits.  While Russia in 2009 is no Turkey, the same general idea applies.  I doubt that it's just a case of laziness.  With a sequel coming sometime in Russia and a reported U.S. remake by, ironically enough, Timbur Bekmambetov in the future, we'll see if this becomes a franchise that gets rebooted within ten years too.  Take us away, Russian Santa Film cameo...

Up next, I bow to the inadvertent whim of one reader and do a week of Killer Clown movies.  First up, a film with a great concept, but no idea how to actually be good.  Stay tuned...