After a 30 year hiatus from films to run an advertisement company, H. G. Lewis returned to film. What would be the project to bring him back? How about a sequel to one of his most famous and iconic films? He decided to do another Blood Feast film, a movie that, admittedly, has almost no plot. Guy goes crazy, kills woman and gets caught- Kurosawa it is not! The issue is going to be whether or not he is too rusty. In addition, have times changed too much for him to be relevant anymore? Let's find out in my review of...
The film begins with some really bad music. I know that the whole 'surf rock revival' thing was big at the time, but this just hurts. Oh yeah, the movie. The grandson of the killer from Blood Feast moves into the same town, buys the same catering company building and decides to set up shop in the exact same way. He seems oddly surprised when this town of 30 people (at best) thinks that he is up to no good. He does everything save for wearing a shirt that says 'I love murder!' By the way, he gets possessed by an evil statue of Ishtar that is kept in the back of the building. Creepy statues are not the kind of things that the police confiscate from insane murderers? Alright then. This is set-up in the beginning by two hobos that kill each other in the statue's light. Of course, the rest of the time, the statue wants human sacrifices, but whatever. The movie gives us a couple of kills- including a naked lady with a drill through her head- but starts to lean towards comedy. I'm worried now.
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Despite the non-budget and brutal killings, the movie insists that it is a 'wacky' comedy. Think that I am exaggerating? Check out the names of our two Detectives: Loomis and Meyers. Ha ha ha- uncreative! The women in the film are given pun names like Bambi Deere and Brandi Alexander. Can't you at least do what Joe Dante did in The Howling and name the characters after directors of other werewolf movies? As the killings escalate, so do the conveniences of plot. Our villain is hired to do the catering for a wedding in town, which happens to be between the young cop and our female lead. The victims are all of the bridesmaids for the wedding, proving yet again that is much safer to be a man in a Lewis film. The fat cop does not want to investigate the obvious murder, but, to be fair, he is also a terrible cop. He brings food to crime scenes and handles every piece of evidence. This makes the cops in The Gore Gore Girls look like Columbo! He mainly refuses to believe in the man's overt guilt because of all the free food he is given when he visits. On the flip-side, we get the mother of the bride, who is a horrible bitch. I would be nicer, but this is the extent of how she was written. Any redemption or humanity given to her? Nope- just death by eye-stabbing.
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The movie only gets stupider and sillier as it goes on. After becoming entranced by the statue himself, the young cop completely changes his tune, just as the fat cop gets some sense. To keep this plot alive, he gives up again when his partner complains about his caterer possibly being arrested. Before this, we are treated to *sigh* a lingerie party held for our heroine. This leads to one of the most confusing scene juxtapositions ever. We see two woman go off, flaunt their bodies and then get attacked. We cut to the cops going to a crime scene, looking around and much time seemingly-passing. When we cut back, the girls are only beginning to wonder about their friends who are one room away! The wedding gives us a bunch of cameo appearances, including John Waters as a priest. This is the level of subtlety we get, folks! They finally confront our villain, who goes down in seconds- letdown. The other cop shows his possession by stabbing the mother, but dies when the statue falls on him. Oh no, the plastic statue must have weighed a ton! The End? Thankfully, yes.
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Oh, how I wanted to love this movie? Finally, a Lewis film made in the modern era of film! Unfortunately, the 'modern' aspect of the film appeared to allude Herschell. Apparently, the film is supposed to be done ironically, which is why we get all the stilted acting/delivery and the stupid dialogue. I can maybe accept that if some hint is given towards that- there is none. As it stands, the movie is a painfully-strange comedy with lots of gore and silly effects. Some real Lewis touches are slipped in, such as when he peels the lady's face off like you would with a banana. As much as some people dislike The Gore Gore Girls, the film is an absurdist comedy that makes its intentions known. This is just painful. Mind you, my feelings about Troma-style comedy do play a part here, so your opinion may differ. So much could have been done with this, but it just fell flat for me. Maybe his Grim Fairy Tales will be better- this one only took six years to get done.*
Next up, toxic waste comes back to get revenge on Martin Landau. Need I say any more? Stay tuned...
I try to like this one, but it is waaay to hokey for its own good. I owned the cut version somehow by mistake, I personally blame Blockbuster, and without the gore there is nothing worth sitting through here
ReplyDeleteNetflix Instant Viewing has it uncut. Mind you, I don't know what the two versions look like, but if there is cut, then the real film must be Saw times 1,000!
ReplyDeleteIt's good to see that we can find some common ground on H.G. Lewis after "The Gore Gore Girls" by the way. I still like that movie, for some reason. :-)