Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Project Terrible Holiday Edition: Christmas Bounty

Back by popular demand- but not quite complete.  I love Project Terrible.  Bob loves Project Terrible.  Other people do as well, but...are too busy right now.  Since it is kind of my thing, I always make time for it.  Bob and I are doing two hand-picked Films in the time between official Rounds to keep you satiated.  He gave me two WWE Films Productions and one of them is set on Christmas, so I'm going to begin right now.  Christmas Bounty was a Film made for ABC Family last year and dumped onto DVD shortly thereafter.  Since Netflix carries it on Streaming, it is an option to do now.  So what is the Film about?  Well, this lady used to be a Bounty Hunter and has an emergency related to her old job come up...on Christmas.  Things get even more complicated when she runs into her old boyfriend (The Miz)- the one she left behind.  Naturally, her new boyfriend shows up too and...she never told him about her old job.  Wackiness ensues.  A Holiday Film about killers with no death- great.  A Film full of shooting, but nobody ever being hit- natural.  A Film Starring The Miz- joy.  Since Bob just kind of hates his face, I'm doing this.  Just remember that The Marine 4 comes out in 2015, Bob!  Is this a new Holiday Classic or on par with The Pac-Man Christmas Special?  To find out, read on...
A woman (Francia Raisa) is living in up-state New York as a Teacher and is dating an Investment Broker.  Life is good.
...or it was.  A man she put away years ago is out and is threatening her family (as opposed to just killing them by surprise).

She used to be a Bounty Hunter (with her parents) and now she must return home to catch the guy.
Unfortunately for us, this guy shows up.
She is forced to team-up with him and her parents to get to the bottom of the case.  They have to catch the criminal before he can get what he wants- them dead!
Further complicating matters, the boyfriend shows up (even though he agreed to wait until New Years to see her) and he doesn't know a thing about her past.

Since this is a terribly-written Comedy, they dick around and lie instead of just telling him the truth.
Will all this wackiness and shooting (plus a Mob Wedding), will everyone survive to celebrate Christmas?  Yes, of course they do.

In spite of that, I won't SPOIL this any further.  Watch it if you want/dare.  The End.
This is surprisingly-average, to be honest.  The Story is not that inspired, but doesn't do anything too stupid.  You have silly conceits (like nobody ever being shot and them just not telling the boyfriend the truth from some reason), but no real Plot Holes.  One thing I'd note is that they barely acclimate you to the woman's new life before throwing her back into the old.  This means that the change has less impact than it should, since you see her 'Jersey' side for about 90% of the Film.  The Acting is pretty middle-of-the-road as well.  Some of them- like the Villain- are pretty hammy, while The Miz tries to do some TV-Level Dramatic Acting.  He's...alright.  One knock I can give him is from the Film's only Chase Scene (around the halfway point) in which he suddenly gains a thick accent...and never does later.  Weird.  The Action is pretty decent, although there is certainly no confusing this for The Raid or anything.  Other than that, there's not much to say.  There's weird, nitpicky stuff like them re-using a Shot (in 2013!) which seems like some bad Editing.  This Film is good enough to please the least-picky of its target audience, while doing nothing to stand the test of time.  This is the kind of Film that gives one its Actors (The Miz) his own name as a Character Name, so that should say alot.  How do you feel about this one, Miz?
Next up, I officially celebrate Christmas with...child murder (both definitions).  I might have been better off with He-Man and She-Ra, huh?  Stay tuned...

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