Friday, June 29, 2012

Slasher Crap: Rest Stop

The only one really being tortured is me!  Some people may like this movie (not a whole lot, honestly), but it just hurt.  I tried- I truly did.  Unfortunately, this movie has really weird pacing and can never keep the film moving.  It stops and starts all the time.  With no rhythm, the flaws are more noticeable as well.  I'll get into those more in-depth later on, but, sufficed to say, there are many.  If you like films that are long, drawn-out and full of confusion, this is your movie.  If you like to see what Torture Porn really looks like, this is your movie.  Since I already watched it, I'm going to pretend that its mine.  To find out why I live to hate, read on...
The plot is simple (at first): a couple elopes to California, but makes a visit to a Rest Stop along the way.  Things go wrong, however...
...when the husband to be goes missing.  This leads to *sigh* our heroine sitting around and moping.  Despite being connected to a road, she...just kind of stays there.
In a scene that's clearly supposed to be more important than it is, our heroine gets a ride from a crazy, religious family in an RV.  Among the clan are those twins from Seconds Apart- yea.

In this film, they amount to nothing but distraction...unless you watch a Post-Credits Scene.  Yeah, that's good Screenwriting!
Some of the 'high points' of this movie all center around our heroine being trapped in the Women's Room at the Rest Stop.  No, really.

First, she tries to pry open the lock...only to get one of her fingers bitten off.  Bear this in mind for later.
Later, the killer- just called The Driver- dumps their video camera from earlier in.  Besides an excuse to show their sex scene from earlier again, it also shows the guy being tortured.

Wait- porn and torture in one scene?  You're making the expression seem very literal, Rest Stop!
In another scene, our heroine is trapped with a paralyzed Cop (Joey Lawrence).  He mostly just spouts random information before asking our heroine to shoot him, rather than leave him to be burned to death. 

Just to be cruel (and ridiculous), she somehow misses the brain on the first shot...while the gun is literally in his mouth.
Over an hour in, the movie FINALLY changes locations for more than a minute as fire is set to the Rest Stop...causing it to blow up.  Lots of gas stored in those toilets, huh?

Oh and we later hear about how the Women's Restroom was 'burned.'  Did he miss the explosion?
Our heroine thinks that she has The Driver caught and beats his head in.  However, thanks to the 'Killer Knows Everything' Cliche, he disguised the boyfriend as him.  That's bleak.
In The End, she blows up The Driver's truck...but he still catches her.  The explanation for this random event the Sequel.  Yeah, screw you, audience!
Aargh!  This movie just hurt me- a lot.  Where to begin?  Pacing- awful.  Story- barely there.  Gore- lots of it, mostly related to torture.  There were a number of ways that this film could have at least been decent.  One- better, more consistent story.  How does the killer know everything ahead of time?  If you're just going to tell me that he's just been doing it long enough to guess everything, you are making a big cop-out.  How does he kill so dramatically without ever being caught?  The answer given in the sequel- I'll explain it then- is a big, old slap in the face.  It raises about 5,003 more questions than the two that it actually answers.  Second- less torture crap.  The only way that some people think to be scary is to have people get tortured.  It's not scary- it's just gross and discomforting.  Just stop it already- seriously!  This movie is ruined by a number of things, including the random, unexplained moments and those mentioned above.  For those of you online who say that it all makes sense, you're lying to both yourself and me.  That logic is about as fake as these random stunt boobs...
Next up, the Sequel that actually explains what's going on.  That is, of course, if you can decipher which message is supposed to be the real one and which one is a lie.  Stay tuned...

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