Saturday, March 16, 2013

Viva La Raza: The Champions of Justice

Put your on masks and enjoy the fun!  Today's film is The Champions of Justice, a film I actually reviewed BEFORE Mondo Bizarro existed.  I did, however, review the other film that came on the release, a double-sided disc titled Lucha Libre.  It holds two Luchador Action Films under the pretense of 'buy it because Nacho Libre came out.'  No, really.  In spite of that, I like the release, even if those double-sided discs are a pain in the ass.  "Oh boy, I can't wait to watch...shit, wrong side of the disc!"  Anyhow, this film stars MOST of the major Lucha Libre stars of the day, save for El Santo.  This is essentially The Avengers, if the film didn't star Captain America.  Even so, fans of Lucha Libre should be content with Mil Mascaras and Blue Demon, the Van Damme of Lucha Libre Action Films.  The film is apparently a sequel to a Lucha Libre film that I haven't seen- that or they just acted like it.  Either way, an evil Scientist is trying to kill our heroes and has a devious way to do it- midgets.  Yes, it's not politically-correct to say that, but this film is far from politically-correct so screw it.  I won't SPOIL how he does it just yet, but you really need to see it.  To find out how awesome this hidden gem is, read on...
Blue Demon is here as...Blue Demon.  What- were you expecting him to play a real character?  Silly man.
Blue Demon, Mil Mascaras and El Medico Asesino team up in the ring to, three unmasked guys. If you want to really enjoy the film, start playing the Lucha Libre Drinking Game.

To do it, take a shot every time they do an Arm Drag.  You'll get a nice buzz from this scene alone.
The midgets that work for the evil Scientist try to kill our heroes with a made-to-scale machine gun (borrowed for For Your Height Only perhaps), but fail to do the job right.  That leads to Plan B.
If you guessed that 'Plan B' was 'Give super-strength to his Midget henchman (who all dress like Underdog,' then you are a weirdo and I love you!
As it turns out, ALL of the Luchadors have god-daughters in the Miss Mexico Pageant.  That' amazing coincidence.  It's also convenient, since they are the targets of our villain.
As it turns out, super-strong midgets are a Luchador's kryptonite.  The only problem is that the Doctor's methods for giving them the strength keeps giving out on them.
Our heroes are really not good at this, it seems, as all of the girls get captured.  One of them is brainwashed, as is Black Mask, one of their comrades.
 Our heroes fight the Doctor and his henchmen on the land, in the air (see the Stinger) and under the water.  Seriously, they fight underwater!
 After a long, silly fight, our heroes win the day and take...a romantic motorcycle ride with their god-daughters.  What's Spanish for 'um eww?'
Everything about this is great.  Well, not in the classical sense, obviously.  If judged as a real film, it has barely any plot, bad acting, silly scenes, ridiculous choreography and a jazz soundtrack that never stops for a second during the fight scenes.  For all those reasons, I love it!  It's unabashedly a stupid and silly movie about Technicos (good Luchadors) fighting Rudos (bad Luchadors).  It doesn't want to be Citizen Kane.  If you want to see Blue Demon awkwardly wrestle/fight a guy, see this movie.  If you want to see more arm drags and fake punches than you've ever thought possible, see this movie.  If you want to see a Luchador fist-fight a guy while they're both parachuting to the ground, see this movie.  Besides, if you get as lucky as me, you get this and Mystery in Bermuda for just $1.99.  That's not a lot of Pesos, but it is a lot fun!  Seriously, this happens!
Next up, I cover the first of two films that I've put off reviewing for a long time.  Get ready for scenes of Werewolves, Zombies and Ator as Dracula.  Stay tuned...

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