Lock Me Up!: 6 Guns

It's kind of odd that there's only one of you.  Today's film is 6 Guns, the only Asylum Western.  To be fair, nearly ever major actor has appeared in a Western/film set in a Western time period.  Hell, even occasional actors like Jewel (Ride with the Devil) appear in them!  However, The Asylum has a pretty major track record with genre films of the Sci-Fi/Horror variety.  Why a Western?  Why only one?  I should mention that this film was Directed by Shane Van Dyke, an Asylum regular who loves to Act and Direct films at the same time.  When you can't do one job well, why do two at the same time?  In addition, his brother is playing the male lead- nepotism!  The plot is actually similar to an old Corman film called The Gunslinger.  Given the time difference, there's more blood, violence and a nice rape scene to really seal the deal.  Westerns are rarely 'classy,' but you guys went a step beyond!  To see if this movie is an anomaly in a good way or a bad way, read on...

A retired gunslinger/Sheriff lives a quiet life with his wife and two kids.  You just know that shit is going to go wrong!

Sure enough, the brother of a guy he killed long ago- played by Asylum regular Geoff Meed (Airline Disaster)- shows up with his posse, kills the kids, rapes the wife (as do the other members) and kills him.  One gang member is 'nice,' since he doesn't rape the wife and lets her live.

Time goes by and she becomes a famous drunk in town.  Good to know that nobody reported the crime at all!  There's the Old West and then there's just lazy writing!

The new Sheriff- Barry Van Dyke- is new in town and is there just in time to take over as the gang is on there way.  Ruh roh.

Greg Evigan is here playing...um, the Deputy, I guess.  He's not the original Sheriff- he dies- and he's not the new one, obviously.  Judging by this expression, he was already on the Sound Stage to film another movie and said 'Screw it- I need a new car!'

If this patch of land looks familiar, it's because you've seen any Asylum film ever.  Seriously, they've shot here for Alien vs. Hunter and Journey to the Center of the Earth (2-D), among others.

The gang comes to town and Evigan tries to play it cool.  As you can see, it doesn't end well.

Our heroine finally does something after begging and moaning for half of the film.  She does take out an equal  number of men to Van Dyke.  She also gets captured by the villain too & has to be saved.

Of course, then she also saves him so...um, confusing Feminism, I guess.

The Sheriff leaves to go after some robbers.  After basically blowing off our heroine, she goes off to chase them too.

Given her track record, she'll be dead in a week.  The End.

Well, it sure felt old-fashioned.  To be honest, this movie isn't terrible.  That said, it does very little to appeal itself.  That make sense to anyone?  It's a pretty 'meh' film really.  I should be fair and say that Westerns were never my favorite Genre.  Even so, I've seen good ones- like my recent viewing of Django- and know what a good one is.  This movie is so generic that, as previously stated, it's essentially a remake of The Gunslinger.  That film itself was pretty much a cash-in Western, just with a casting gimmick (a female gun fighter).  What it adds is a not-so-interesting hero's journey.  She goes from being a mother to a widow to a drunk and eventually a semi-competent gun fighter.  There's a whole lot of luck involved too, which kind of undermines the whole thing.  It's kind of intriguing as a curiosity piece, but that's about it.  In the forty-plus years since Corman's not-so-epic film, all that The Asylum added was melodrama and rape.  Progressive?  Speaking of which, way to film that back of the Back Lot- that totally matches the set!

Up next, a recent Asylum film featuring friend of the site Bill Oberst Jr.  Will his weirdly-awesome film elevate this film to be *gasp* good?  Stay tuned...