It is that time again! Cue the Banner, me!
Sorry, Universal. For my 2,900th Post (I know- right!), let's revisit a Studio who I've avoided for at least 6 months (an Immediate Response not counting, that is)- The Asylum. Joy! Today's Film is Frankenstein Reborn, the Asylum Version of a now-Classic Tale. This one has many of the elements you'd expect to see, but many differences too. This is part of the Shot Together To Save Money Series from the company. Basically, they shot a bunch of Films together with the same Cast in varying Roles in 2005. This includes War of the Worlds, King of the Lost World, Bram Stoker's Dracula's Curse, Legion of the Dead and The Beast of Bray Road. The Films were all released in a 6-month period and feature recurring Cast Members aplenty. This is notable not just for the Stars, but also for the bit players. For example, Andrew Lauer- aka some guy from Caroline in the City- appears in Beast, Legion and King- literally for one Scene in the latter! That brings me to this Film with, well, most of those people. Bruce Boxleitner was too busy for this shit- good for him. This one is set in modern times and takes some odd liberties with the Story. Rather than watching me ramble here, how about you watch me ramble down below?
The Film begins with the typical Person Gets Killed bit. It is...Sarah Lieving!
Do I act like a dick and go 'Yea- they killed her!' or just not care? Vote, America!
Now that that we got that out of the way, the actual Story begins with Dr. Franks (since Rhett can't play German, apparently) under arrest before suspicion of murder. Cue Flashbacks!
So the good Doc and his comrades were experimenting on this oddly-muscular guy with a degenerative muscle disease to cure him via nanites in the brain. Naturally.
Things eventually go awry due to some confusing Plot Point involving the Doctor's evil thoughts being downloaded (like an evil Chappie, I guess) into the Patient...or something. You got me!
Anyhow, 2 of them continue the work on what now looks like The Mummy.
We interrupt this Horror Story for a Threesome Scene. It worked for Invasion of the Pod People,..
They eventually resurrect the Patient...who now suddenly looks like The Mummy in the face too.
Seriously, what part of the procedure messed up face and teeth so much!!!
The Monster kills off the Doc's co-workers, the latter of whom he once loved. Time to make a Bride under duress, I guess.
As the Flashback and Present collide, the Police, the Doctor, the Psychiatrist (aka Dracula from Bram Stoker's Dracula's Curse) and the Monster all meet up. After some random gore, the Shrink zaps both Monster and Doc, killing them.
After some cheesy narration, we get some Sequel Bait. No such luck, Frankenstein Reborn...Again!
Madam I'm Adam....and this Film is not good. The basic Plot is fine. The Monster Make-Up (which grotesque in ways that make no sense for the Story) is actually quite good. The random Gore and other Practical Effects you get are also good. Pretty much everything else lets this Story down though. The framing is confusing as they don't just stick with 'Doctor tells Story and sets up Ending.' Instead, we get random breaks for the Psychiatrist to meet with the Police, his colleagues, the Police again and so on. On top of that, we get footage repeated a couple of times for no good reason. It is the 'I told you this, but the Audience will now see what really happened' schtick, basically. In other words, your 84 minute Film (counting Credits) wasn't long enough. The Acting is overall good, with some (like Giles) performing better than others. The big problem for me is that I've seen this same bunch of Actors over and over again. First it was Dracula, then it was King Kong, etc. It is kind of tiresome now, so imagine what it was like in 2005-6 when these Films kept popping up in order over a 6-month time. I appreciate that they didn't bring Andrew Lauer back for a Scene Cameo Kill, though...I guess. Overall, it is like most Asylum Films- some good ideas (usually not theirs) done in a way that is less satisfactory than it should be. This isn't too cheesy, which is a plus...I guess. Now let me see that 'I'm reading your stupid Text' Face, Sarah...
Next up, some super-cheesy nonsense of the good kind. Barry Bostwick, a Werewolf and some super-ridiculous Experiment! Stay tuned...
Sorry, Universal. For my 2,900th Post (I know- right!), let's revisit a Studio who I've avoided for at least 6 months (an Immediate Response not counting, that is)- The Asylum. Joy! Today's Film is Frankenstein Reborn, the Asylum Version of a now-Classic Tale. This one has many of the elements you'd expect to see, but many differences too. This is part of the Shot Together To Save Money Series from the company. Basically, they shot a bunch of Films together with the same Cast in varying Roles in 2005. This includes War of the Worlds, King of the Lost World, Bram Stoker's Dracula's Curse, Legion of the Dead and The Beast of Bray Road. The Films were all released in a 6-month period and feature recurring Cast Members aplenty. This is notable not just for the Stars, but also for the bit players. For example, Andrew Lauer- aka some guy from Caroline in the City- appears in Beast, Legion and King- literally for one Scene in the latter! That brings me to this Film with, well, most of those people. Bruce Boxleitner was too busy for this shit- good for him. This one is set in modern times and takes some odd liberties with the Story. Rather than watching me ramble here, how about you watch me ramble down below?
The Film begins with the typical Person Gets Killed bit. It is...Sarah Lieving!
Do I act like a dick and go 'Yea- they killed her!' or just not care? Vote, America!
Now that that we got that out of the way, the actual Story begins with Dr. Franks (since Rhett can't play German, apparently) under arrest before suspicion of murder. Cue Flashbacks!
So the good Doc and his comrades were experimenting on this oddly-muscular guy with a degenerative muscle disease to cure him via nanites in the brain. Naturally.
Things eventually go awry due to some confusing Plot Point involving the Doctor's evil thoughts being downloaded (like an evil Chappie, I guess) into the Patient...or something. You got me!
Anyhow, 2 of them continue the work on what now looks like The Mummy.
We interrupt this Horror Story for a Threesome Scene. It worked for Invasion of the Pod People,..
They eventually resurrect the Patient...who now suddenly looks like The Mummy in the face too.
Seriously, what part of the procedure messed up face and teeth so much!!!
The Monster kills off the Doc's co-workers, the latter of whom he once loved. Time to make a Bride under duress, I guess.
As the Flashback and Present collide, the Police, the Doctor, the Psychiatrist (aka Dracula from Bram Stoker's Dracula's Curse) and the Monster all meet up. After some random gore, the Shrink zaps both Monster and Doc, killing them.
After some cheesy narration, we get some Sequel Bait. No such luck, Frankenstein Reborn...Again!
Madam I'm Adam....and this Film is not good. The basic Plot is fine. The Monster Make-Up (which grotesque in ways that make no sense for the Story) is actually quite good. The random Gore and other Practical Effects you get are also good. Pretty much everything else lets this Story down though. The framing is confusing as they don't just stick with 'Doctor tells Story and sets up Ending.' Instead, we get random breaks for the Psychiatrist to meet with the Police, his colleagues, the Police again and so on. On top of that, we get footage repeated a couple of times for no good reason. It is the 'I told you this, but the Audience will now see what really happened' schtick, basically. In other words, your 84 minute Film (counting Credits) wasn't long enough. The Acting is overall good, with some (like Giles) performing better than others. The big problem for me is that I've seen this same bunch of Actors over and over again. First it was Dracula, then it was King Kong, etc. It is kind of tiresome now, so imagine what it was like in 2005-6 when these Films kept popping up in order over a 6-month time. I appreciate that they didn't bring Andrew Lauer back for a Scene Cameo Kill, though...I guess. Overall, it is like most Asylum Films- some good ideas (usually not theirs) done in a way that is less satisfactory than it should be. This isn't too cheesy, which is a plus...I guess. Now let me see that 'I'm reading your stupid Text' Face, Sarah...
Next up, some super-cheesy nonsense of the good kind. Barry Bostwick, a Werewolf and some super-ridiculous Experiment! Stay tuned...
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