The Real Godfather: Two Thousand Maniacs

What can you say about Herschell Gordon-Lewis? No, seriously, I'm asking you. I mean, the man is famous for having the oldest film on the Video Nasty List from the UK (1963's Blood Freak) and sharing the nickname 'The Godfather of Gore' with Lucio Fulci. How can there be two Godfathers? Because, that's how! This is one of his most iconic films, even if it is not one of the more famously watched. It's sort of like how everyone talks about the iconic nature of Last House on the Left, but has not actually seen it (myself included). Thanks to Something Weird video (the company behind 90% of his DVD releases), we get a chance to actually see it. Is it worth the hype? Was Natalie Merchant wise to name her band as an homage to it? Find out in my review of...

Our film begins with a series of people being tricked into taking a detour from their route to Augusta, GA. A couple of yokels switch a sign out and then put it back after they have left. Why the deception? All in good time, young Padawan. When the two groups of people arrive, they are told that they are the guests of honor for a special festival. The town is just a giant pile of Southern cliches which, to be fair, are accurate in the context of the story. As an aside, this movie was filmed in my home state of Florida. Ha! We got this and Frogs. What have you got, Los Angeles?!? Anyhow, our heroes decide to stay and take part in the festivities. The men stay for the jail bait 'tail' and the women stay for...um, I'm not sure why they stay. In spite of this lack of logic (a minor one for a low-budget horror film from this day), things start to get hairy. We get a lot of banter between our heroes, but they are barely two-dimensional, so let's skip that. Our first kill comes as a man is liquored up and left behind by his friends. After they leave, he is drawn and quartered. Of course, this is 1964 and this movie has no budget, so you barely see anything. Moving on...

A short while later, one of the women is lured away by a local hunk and chopped up. Who wants Northerner Jerky? Meanwhile, our heroes wonder where the companions have gone, but really do nothing about it. One pair is taken away for two different 'games,' which are obviously what you would think. The man is placed in a barrel with nails facing inwards and rolled down a hill. He dies a bloody death, although this is still nothing compared to Hostel. The woman is strapped down to a big target and has to guess a number. Why? Because if she gets it wrong, a boulder will be dropped on her a la a really fucked-up dunk tank. Give them points for creativity, I guess. Eventually, our heroes figure out that something is up. One of them is played by William Kerwin, a regular player in Lewis' films and the announcer in all of his trailers. Through a really slow and uninspired sequence, they escape the town in a car. They rush back to the Sheriff (enjoy your second scene, guy), who drives them back to Pleasant Valley. Once they get there, they find that it is *gasp* not there. It was the site of a Northern massacre in 1865 and rises every 100 years for revenge. The End.

Yes, this is in fact 'Brigadoon.'

This movie is good, but certainly has to be viewed in a certain light. It is low-budget, has pretty lame dialogue and one note characters. In other words, it is a H.G. Lewis film. Some of the acting is good, but most of it is pretty stilted. Kerwin is alright, but never musters up much emotion in any of Lewis' films. The evil Southerners at least seem to have fun in their roles and the gore is amusing, as little as you really see by comparison to Blood Feast and Color Me Blood Red. As a side note, I hate the fact that this is always labeled as Part 2 of the 'Blood Trilogy.' Stop and think about this: Lewis made Feast, Blood Red and A Taste of Blood. So, why is this the middle part? Ahh, that feels better. Seriously though, this is a pretty fun movie.  One question though: how do they have Phones if they were invented in 1876?

I like the film, but I think that needs more hate-worthy characters and gore. Oh good, I'm in luck. Stay tuned...