The Real Godfather?: 2001 Maniacs

Well, I'm back with another film about a bunch of idiots who end up in the hands of some crazy rednecks with murder on their minds. This time, it is a remake from 2005. Forty years seems to be the key number in how long you can wait to do new versions of Lewis films (this will make sense later). Anyhow, this film is titled like a sequel, which makes the film a bit confusing. As we- me- all know, the only way that a sequel can be done is if it is set in 2065, the next time the town rises from the midst. Come to think of it, why has nobody made this movie yet? Future people with ray guns who fly into Pleasant Valley? That is a license to print some damn money! I'm getting off-topic, so let's jump right into...

2001 Maniacs

So what has changed in this updated tale? Not a lot, actually. However, I will address some key differences.
-The victims are a mix of drunken idiots, perverts and skanks.
-Two of the heroes are black people...whose idea of foreplay is to do fake UFC fighting. Yeah, you lost me there.
-The Mayor is now played by Robert Englund, which is one good change.

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There are some similarities however...
-One person is killed by being drawn and quartered. Except, it is the slutty girl who has to be in her underwear. Plus, they show lots of bad CG gore.
-They do the 'rock' death, only with a bell instead.
-The ending is EXACTLY the same, only it takes place after a cheesy 'transformation scene.'

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What other deaths do we get in this movie?
-The black guy is killed by a giant cotton gin. Racist? Stupid? You decide!
-One virginal character is serviced by a skanky Southerner, only for her to sprout Jaws (the Bond villain)-like teeth, bite off his you-know-what and kill him. Just for the record, the people are all ghosts, making this completely illogical.
-Another man is tricked into drinking moonshine that is actually acid. Hey, I just did a version of that in my Fulci list! Yes, I love cheap plugs.

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Are there any good characters in this movie?
-I liked Englund, mostly because of his accent and his flag eye-patch.
-Everyone else can just go to hell, pretty much.

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This movie is bad for a lot of reasons. A film full of strange, unlikeable jerks can work sometimes. When you actually want us to care, however, it is a bad idea. One good thing about the original is that it was made before certain horror cliches littered the market. This one wallows it in like Louie Anderson in a pool of chocolate gravy. By the way, don't ever eat chocolate gravy. So, the choice is simple: get the old film with less gore, but less hate-worthy characters or get the new one with lots of gore and terrible people. You decide! By the way, using the same ending is pathetic. You couldn't be creative at all after giving a ghost Southerner woman metal teeth? Really?!?

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Up next, Blockbuster Trash brings us a look at other worlds...which hate modern bullets. Stay tuned...