Wednesday, February 18, 2015

'80s Riffed Trash: Alien Outlaw

A Film only worth tackling with some help.  Thankfully, I did this in the right order.  On Rifftrax, they released this as a VOD and it looked funny.  It was.  The Movie sucks, but they made it hilarious to watch.  The former is important because, you know what, I might as well finish off the Directing Career of Phil Smoot now.  So what is Alien Outlaw?  As you probably guessed, the Plot involves an Alien.  Right off the bat, we have issues.  First- there are three Aliens here.  Is only one of them an Outlaw?  Are they from a place called Outlaw?  Are they just a band called Outlaw that happens to be Aliens?  Second- how do we know that they are Outlaws?  This Film has them running around and killing people, but how do I know that other Aliens consider killing us to be bad?  We could just be like those Goldfish you scoop out at a State Fair as far as they are concerned.  Am I overthinking this or did Phil Smoot- who is also the Writer and a Producer- underthink it?  Dunno.  The Film is notable for featuring Lash LeRoux, who was also in Smoot's other Film- The Dark Power.  It also features two of his barely-there buddies in pointless Cameos.  It is also the first AND LAST role of Kari Anderson, who plays the alleged Lead here.  I say 'alleged' since the Film has too many Characters and was Edited by someone with selective ADHD.  It jumps from Scene to Scene all the time, but sometimes lingers WAY too long in them.  How bad is this one?  Well, I watched Smoot's other Film about five years ago and only saw his 2nd through Rifftrax, so you decide.  To find out for yourself, read on...
An alien ship shows up in...North Carolina, but crashes (off-camera).  You get this effect twice, so enjoy it.
This is Jesse Jamison.  She runs an Old West-style Shooting 1985.  Was that a thing?
The Film's Cast is chock full of Rednecks.  There's not anything inherently wrong with that, but...this is so absurd that I'm not sure if it is supposed to be Parody or not.  I mean...
So anyhow, these are what the Aliens look like.  For the record, this did come out before Predator.  For the record, Alien Humanoids running around was also not invented by Predator, know.
You want something scary?  How about this Scene with Lash in his boxer shorts?!?
Or this amazingly-unfunny fat guy covered in yarn, pots and pans?  Real scary.
The Climax involves Jesse chasing the 3 Aliens through the woods on both horseback and on-foot.  As for Lash, he does nothing of use.  He just keeps reminding her of how many bullets she has left and telling her to aim carefully.

Seriously- he doesn't use a Whip once here!
The Aliens one weakness- their 'Shoot Me Here' Backpacks that explode.  Holy, Legend of Zelda!
The finale is especially goofy as it involves Lash and Jesse constantly-reminding us of how many bullets are left, Lash's useless motivational speeches and Jesse only winning by luck (and faulty science).  The End.
What a ridiculous mess.  The Film tries to be a Comedy.  The Film tries to be Science-Fiction.  The Film tries to be a realistic Action Film.  It pretty much fails at all of them.  It isn't really funny (without Rifftrax).  It is barely Sci-Fi, as we never see the Aliens with advanced weapons or really see the ship well.  As far being realistic, they do track things like bullet count and show reloading.  That doesn't make it really interesting.  It isn't better or worse because of this.  It would be a bad, poorly-shot Scene regardless of if they fired 5 shots or 5,000.  Here's the big question: who is this for?  Is it for Sci-Fi Fans who also love Hee-Haw?  Is it for Dukes of Hazard fans that also love Aliens?  Is it for Gunsmoke fans that also love Hee-Haw AND Aliens?  I honestly couldn't tell you.  I can tell you again that if this sounds ridiculous, Rifftrax is the way to go (as with Dark Power).  Oh and don't feel bad for the Film's 'Star.'  According to IMDB, she works as a Make-Up Artist/Assistant on a range of Films/TV like The Flash, Rapture-palooza and True Justice.  I'll leave you with a spot from the new Rifftrax Intro.  Fun Game- try to guess as many of the people as you can...
Next up, I tackle the long-delayed follow-up to a 70s Cult Classic.  Will the Meta Plot help or hurt this one?  Stay tuned...

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