New Crap: Curse of Chucky

You just had to do it, didn't you?  We have already have FIVE of these movies, but you just had to make another one.  Today's film is Curse of Chucky, the latest film in the Child's Play series.  You know a series is great when they change the title just to confuse you.  Yes, I know that there is a tangential excuse for the change- since it focused on Chucky and not on him chasing the same kid-, but it is still annoying.  So after 9 years, why the rush to make a Sequel?  Well, plans were laid out for a Remake and a Sequel...since that makes sense to someone.  That brings us to the only one of those that has actually come out: Curse of Chucky.  The film follows the rest of the films, except in the parts where it seems to blatantly-contradict them.  I won't go over all of those moments though, since I like to avoid SPOILERS on films that are this new.  The story, so to speak, is one of those ones that they don't bother to start explaining until the Climax.  Good- I hate knowing what's going on!  Sufficed to say, Chucky starts killing people, all of whom are involved in a bunch of personal drama to distract them.  Sure helps pad the run-time out to 90 minutes too!  To get a hint of what you're getting into, read on...

The film begins with a doll being delivered to a big house in the Woods.  It's natural that they own this random place.

The mother is found dead by the paralyzed daughter while Chucky watches nearby (see Title Card).  Oh nos!

Who wouldn't trust this face?  I mean, it's so...feminine.

Is Chucky going metro-sexual on us?

It's not long before the body count reaches 1.  It's alot longer until it reaches 2, but I digress.

I won't SPOIL the pay-off to this moment, but it is suitably-over-the-top.

I also won't SPOIL the secret being kept by these two ladies.

Oh and people just kind of hang around the house, because...um, they're sad about grandma dying.  Sure- that's a reason to hang around the place where a death just happened!

Quick- make a stupid face if you are possibly the dumbest person in the movie(which is saying alot!)!  Perfect.

Chucky finally reveals himself about halfway through the film.  It would be like if you didn't see the Shark for an hour in Jaws 6.

Seriously, is their suspense at this point about whether Chucky is the killer?  Nope.

There's an odd bit before the Climax involving a hidden camera planted on Chucky (which he apparently ignores).  It should be a major plot point (especially given how the film wraps up), but apparently they just ignore it/forget about it.

Here's something new: random flashback scenes show why Chucky is targeting the family.  It's a nice and silly Retcon that...is completely-unnecessary.

Bonus points for making Charles Lee Ray look like Tommy Wiseau!

I won't SPOIL the Ending here.  However, I will tell you that the Endings (plural) go on forever.

Seriously, if you just added fades to black, this would be worse than Return of the King.  Oh and prepare for some major plot contradictions (and repetition).  The End.

I really hope the Remake isn't coming next.  To be honest with you, I've never been a big Chucky fan.  Jason Voorhees was intimidating.  Micheal Meyers was a scary, killing machine.  Freddy Kreuger was a creative and fun-loving killer.  Chucky was...that doll that somehow racked up a giant body count.  He's all of the humor of Freddy and none of the threat.  Even so, he's had six films now- tied with the Leprechaun (until his Remake comes out).  So what's new here?  Freddy in a confined space and working on a much-shorter time-frame.  The theoretical build-up and suspense over whether the doll could kill or not is rushed.  Isn't that the whole gimmick?  On top of that, they really draw out actually showing you Chucky in 'action.'  Seriously, why wait?  This film is in the awkward position of acting as a Sequel to the original films, while also setting up everything again for new viewers.  Why you think someone will come in on the SIXTH film is anyone's guess.  It could have something to do with there being a 9-year gap between films.  Never mind that that last one wasn't exactly a cultural milestone to begin with!  There has been some positive buzz online about this film, but I wasn't a huge fan.  It wants to be a Sequel, but much of the plot hinges on contradictions to the previous films.  Even their own footage seems to contradict themselves, whether it is the video log bit with Chucky or the alternate Ending contrasting with the 'official' one.  The biggest problem: this is what is called an Idiot Story.  It only works when everyone acts like idiots.  That is just bad writing.  Fans of the series may be more (or less) forgiving.  Take us away, pointless scene of the young starlet in her underwear.

Next up, I delve back into Project Terrible.  Will I cover a Creep, a Knight or some Zombies?  Stay tuned...