Saturday, July 30, 2011

Project Terrible: (Trans)Mutations

After this, I only have one more to go!  George Pavlou is a Director with kind of an odd career.  As I stated in my Rawhead Rex review, he teamed up with Clive Barker to adapt some of his stories into films.  After three, the partnership was over.  Barker started working on his own films, while Pavlou moved into...children's television.  I shit you not!  Here's the part that I didn't mention: Barker started making his own films (starting with Hellraiser) because these ones turned out so bad!  It's good to know that you're a part of film history...even if it is in the most ironic and embarrassing way possible.  So what is this film about?  As the title *hints* at, it is about mutants.  If you're looking for a deep, dark film about monsters and death, watch Nightbreed.  While not the best Barker film, it is far better than this.  This is Project Terrible- are you really surprised?  Let's beat up Pavlou's dog as we check out...
Basically, a young lady goes missing and a hard-nosed detective is hired to find him.  He also used to date her, which makes him both an obvious and a bad choice!
Denholm Elliot is here as a scientist who...dammit, Denholm- why are you here?  I should talk about the movie, but I won't.  Poor Denholm.
On the bright side, Robert Z'Dar is in the movie.  Oh right- it's just the Elephant Man's cousin (he knows the Director).
Stop- dance break!  Remember, you can do what you want to do...in Living Color.
After a lot of boring scenes in nightclubs, the mutants stage a revolt against the man experimenting on them.  Shocking, I know.
The scientist and his men fight back (using a Gas Gun right out of the 1960's Batman show), but things don't go too well.  Any last words, Denholm?
I guess not.  The End.
You were better off with the random monster, George.  The plot of this movie is a slow burn...to a pretty silly climax.  Nothing all that interesting happens for a long time.  Incidentally, I should explain to any future filmmaker who might read this what subtlety is.  For example, this movie mentions how the heroine/MacGuffin has proven to be immune to the treatments...about five times.  Could you possibly have guessed that she was in fact a mutant after all?  Yeah- that was obvious.  The acting is alright, but nobody really stands out all that much.  Even Elliot is not that great here, but...he's still Denholm Elliot, dammit.  It's just a shame that the movie is so dull, uninspired and obsessed with nightclubs.  They're not interesting.  On top of that, the movie is so hard to get that the only available copy to me is a VHS transfer e-mailed to me by Maynard.  No DVD release for you either, Pavlou film!  If you want to watch a George Pavlou (stay with me)/Clive Barker collaboration, watch Rawhead Rex.  It's silly, ridiculous and random....but not boring.
Up next, August begins with some Forgotten Three-quels.  Come see the film which has Aragorn killing 'townies.'  Stay tuned...

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