Monday, May 29, 2017

Holiday Flix: The Zombie Army

Well, it has to be more fun than that Monsters Sequel.  Today's Film is The Zombie Army, a 1991 Shot-on-Video Film with a micro-budget.  This is cheap.  This is a little sleazy.  This is a little dumb.  Okay, that last one is a lie.  It is a very dumb Film.  It has the Military and Zombies though, so it is perfect!  The Plot here is all sorts of silly.  Do you really want to know what happens?  The Director has no other Credits on IMDB.  Nobody in the Film seems to either.  Let's just get this over with, shall we?
In the Cold Open. this guy lectures a Class about his fellow Doctor's study on Idiot Savants.  He talks about the test subject.

Naturally, this turns out to be him.  Shocking, said nobody.
Some time later, the Asylum has been abandoned and the Military is taking over.  However...
The guy from earlier (and some lady) have hid out there for years (somehow) and kill the 2 Soldiers inside.  They try to turn them into...

All you need to do, it seems, is zap a dead body with enough voltage to revive it...but not so much that you blow up the head.
As the body count slowly rises (the Film stretches to fill 90 minutes), more Soldiers join up.

Do I highlight the random Soldier with a Katana or this lady with goggles?  The latter.
They randomly introduce a Couple who start to have PG-13 sex nearby.  How they hear NONE OF THIS is beyond me.

The pay-off- death.
As more Soldier die, they come up with a new plan: Acid.
And lo, they did melt the Zombies with acid until they turn into goop.
Randomly-unnecessary wrap-up Scene?  Why not?  The End.
This is certainly not the best or the brightest.   Yes, I know that it isn't the Army's thing.  This Film has a decent, if ridiculous idea.  The problem is that it was made pretty poorly.  Big Budget or small Budget- this isn't that good.  It is slow where it should be fast and it is fast where it should be slow.  I will say that some of the Music is fun and the Make-Up is generally better than you might think.  Other than that, it is pretty forgettable.  It feels like the first (and only) effort from someone who could maybe do better with more experience.  Unfortunately, I don't think that they ever did anything else.  Oh well.  As a Bonus, the Film comes with Previews for other Films that I probably won't see, including this 'Animated Classic'...
Enjoy your Memorial Day and stay out of abandoned Asylums.  Do you *need* to be told that though?

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