Wednesday, March 9, 2011

A Review in Pictures: Alien vs. Ninja

Aliens are cool.  Ninjas are cool.  The two of them fighting is a no-lose situation.  At least, I hope so.  You see, I'm used to movie premises disappointing me in different ways.  This has to be better than Assault Girls though, right?  The plot of this movie is simple- aliens show up and fight ninjas.  Other than minor bits of exposition here and there, that's it.  As this is a newer film- and one that I think more curious folks should see- this will not be a normal review.  I'm just going to give you a taste of what you'll get without any context to SPOIL the results.  It's crazy and random, so enjoy.  Let's put on our black, Predator skull hats to check out the battle of...
We see ninjas escape an exploding building that is now a green screen.  They get attacked by more ninjas, however, and have a silly fight.  The group even does all of this with a comic-relief character in tow!  They also run into a gay stereotype character whose insulting nature speaks for itself.
Shortly after this, the group meets up with more ninjas and get attacked by aliens.  We don't get to see them for a bit, but they're worth the wait.  The battle between invader and Dojo invader is broken into several segments and even involves...some John Woo gun-posing.  No, really.
The plot gets crazy as the aliens infect other ninjas, forcing our heroes to have to rip giant, gum balls out of them.  The final battle between alien and ninja occurs and gets really silly.  It involves swords, guns and mid-air explosions.  I won't SPOIL what happens though.  The End.
Leering aliens for the win!  The plot of this movie is silly and kind of dumb.  Of course, who is surprised by this?  The movie is not trying to be one of the more serious Gonzo films out of Japan a la Tokyo Gore Police. This one of those movies that just wants to be silly and have special effects in it a la Robo-Geisha.  Very little in the film is meant to be taken seriously.  Of course, the movie does still try to mix in danger and drama, which is certainly an odd fit.  The weirdest moment: a bit where one of the aliens leers at the film's lone, female character.  The combination of it's 'groping hands,' it's eye-winking and raised lip is just weird and creepy.  The alien shows off a lot of skills and flexibility for a guy in a rubber suit.  While watching the film, play this game: Find the eye-slots on the suit.  The bottom line is this: if you're in the mood for fun, silly entertainment, this is a good film.  If you like more serious work, look elsewhere.  If you pick up a movie called Alien vs. Ninja and expect a drama, however, you have more problems to worry about!
Next up, I review a movie that I only watched because it featured Chris Jericho.  Naturally, it's a Wrong Turn rip-off with religious overtones.  Stay tuned...

1 comment:

  1. I will see this. Next week, if the gods pay me favor.