Friday, July 10, 2015

Moon Over Miami: Josh Kirby...Time Warrior- Last Battle for the Universe

At last, the 42-month journey is at an end.  Today's Film is Josh Kirby...Time Warrior: Last Battle for the Universe, the final Film in the Series.  Is this a happy day or a sad day?  This attempt by Full Moon to make a Serial Film Series for kids turned out...interesting.  I'm being polite, sorry.  Let's cover this one right, shall we?  Josh Kirby was a normal kid until he got dragged into a 25th Century conflict.  The quest: find the pieces of the (not Ultimate) Nullifier before Dr. Zoetrope (yes, really) finds them.  Joined by a lady Warrior and a puppet named Prism, the pair have gone to worlds with Knights on Dinosaurs, giant alien overlords, animated toys and Mushroom People.  It is less interesting than it sounds.  In the last Episode, we got a big (and inexplicable) twist: his Mentor is evil!  We've got like 100 minutes to get through, so let's take one final trip...
Josh is confused when his Mentor (Irwin 1138) is suddenly acting evil and takes the Nullifier pieces after threatening them and subsequently stranding them.
Thanks to his never-before-mentioned power to read the past through Zoetrope's mind (apparently!), he learns that Irwin works for the bad guy running the World and that the Nullifier would destroy his ultimate weapon.
Using Josh's vague time powers, they leap 1984.  Swing and a miss.

Oh look- dead Mom.  How sad.
When they try to use a make-shift Time Machine, they end up shrunk.  Why?  Don't ask.
They make a new Machine, but there is a catch: only Josh can go.  It takes all but one of the Devices that keeps them safe while time-traveling, so Zoetrope and the girl end up being erased.  Ouch.
Josh shows up in make-shift armor (a thimble and the screen from a door) and manages to beat Irwin in Zoetrope's old armor by....aging it up.  Sure- why not?!?
He just gives up immediately then and Zoetrope (in the proper timing) shows up and saves the day.
Back home, Charisma Carpenter shows up to remind us that Charisma Carpenter was in this Film...
...and a different version of the lady warrior shows up (wearing a Prism) and befriends him.  The End.
About the quality I've come to expect by now.  This one isn't terrible.  To be honest, none of them really are.  At worst, they are just kind of bad and/or disappointing.  These Films have never really achieved their potential.  You have a Plot involving Time and Space Travel and what do you do with it?  Rip off the plot of Wizards, Babes in Toyland and a Doctor Who Storyline.  A clean, fresh palette and...that's it?  Oh well.  Regardless, there are neat ideas in this whole Series, but they just never quite go anywhere.  The Twist thrown into the final Film/Segment is just an odd one.  I guess it isn't really cheating, but it is damn close.  You just didn't tell us everything.  I won't say that it ruins everything either, but it just so close to being a cheat that it doesn't help matters.  It is like they had nowhere to go and just came up with this on the fly.  Mind you, alot of this Series seems to be made up on the fly, whether it is how Josh's powers work or how Zoetrope works.  It was nice of them to attempt to add some drama for the final Chapter though.  As a whole, it is a fitting conclusion to the Story.  It is kind of random, abrupt and unclear.  Way to be consistent.  As a the Series ends, enjoy this random look they give you at their glorious Effects...
Next up, I decide to pick on Steven Seagal again.  At this point, I've seen more of his Films than...well, anyone right?  Stay tuned...

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