Poor Bastards of Cinema: The Lawnmower Man 2- Jobe's War

Like those Nigerian Prince E-mails, Lawnmower Man-related material keeps appearing when you least expect it.  I do, however, promise that this is the last bit of it.

Well, unless I find something amazing later.

In Lawnmower Man 2, Not-Really-Jobe is working for some evil business guy.  He causes a plane to crash...somehow, but is spotted celebrating his victory by a grunt named Guillermo.

If this had been made like 2 years later, I'd almost give them credit for a referent joke.

Even though he sees the camera see him and he KNOWS that Jobe controls the computers, Guillermo decides to jack in (with his iPhones!) to look up more about Jobe.

 He logs into their virtual Internet (the real kind, mind you) and asks for 'The Secret Files.'  They are...granted.

Edward Snowden could have gotten ALL of your files with this level of protection in place!

This is apparently a trap (maybe) by Jobe who appears in front of Guillermo's avatar, summons a sword and...apparently knights him.

Seriously, he doesn't swing or stab- he just kind of touches him with his lightning-rod-sword-thing.

This kills Guillermo...since their system allows for no protection against brain death.  That's a minor flaw.

In the aftermath, this death is not mentioned by anyone.  How Jobe ditched the body when he's trapped in a room with no legs is anyone's guess.  I guess EvilCo just felt like covering it up for him.

Sorry that Tech Job didn't work out for you, Guillermo.

It is a nice lesson for all of you who watch those ITT Tech Ads and think about joining.  This.  could.  be.  you!