Thursday, July 17, 2014

Norwequels: Cold Prey 2

A Horror Sequel that is clearly-inspired by a more-famous Horror Sequel- alright.  Today's film is Cold Prey 2, the follow-up to...well, you figure it out.  To get you up to date, a bunch of people went to a Cabin and got killed by some guy with a birth mark.  One of them survived to kill the killer (who must kill again!) and just kind of wander away.  It was a well-made-enough film, but it offered nothing new.  It was very similar to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (only with less heat and much more snow).  It left many unanswered questions- like how the kid survived to become the killer- and this film hopes to answer them.  Don't worry- it will raise many new questions.  In this direct follow-up, our heroine gets taken to a nearby Hospital, but her killer revives there to kill again (see- I told you!).  Does this Story sound familiar?  Change the lead's name from Jannicke to Laurie Strode and see if that helps.  Yeah, it's Halloween 2 (the good one, not the Zombie one)!  There are some differences, since this isn't a Gus Van Zant Remake or anything.  Will this film be the Horror Sequel to end all Horror Sequels?  No, that's still Waxwork II.  To see if can turn out to be the second best, read on...
A Norwegian Hospital is set to be closed shortly (taking a plot point from Assault on Precinct 13), which allows for a lower Casting Budget.

They also make sure to leave a box of equipment like pickaxes out, which I'm sure will have no pay-off.
A random guy is sent to investigate an abandoned car (our heroes') and runs across our Endelig Jente.  She survived for how long in that simple coat in a Norwegian Winter?!?
She wakes up in the Hospital and the Police are asking questions.  I was worried that this was going to turn into The Descent: Part II (which came a year later), but it sticks to a different Horror Sequel (as mentioned above).
The Police investigate her claims and recover all of the bodies (including that of the Killer) and find...alot more bodies.  Wow, payoff to the possibly-offensive B-Roll of 'People Missing While Hiking' Footage!
In a bit of what I dub Screenwriting Bullshit, the Killer revives (from his chest wound and long fall)...since he has to.  We get a nice (but silly) bit of slow-motion with our heroine trying to stop his revival.
Much like Jason X, they quickly regret reviving him.  He kills Young Cop seconds after obvious 'You gonna die' Romance Set-Up and he follows it up by killing Love Interest Nurse...after knocking her out and moving her.

Seriously, he hits her once to knock her out, drags her to the Showers and hits her one more time to kill her.  Why?  What was the point?!?
The Killer takes out the fodder- I mean, Supporting Cast- and proceeds to chase our heroine around.  This is, of course, after a pointless Dream Sequence to pad out the runtime.

Our heroines fight off the Killer, who flees after a fatal gunshot wound (which he shrugs off).  Of course.
Our heroine goes back to the Cabin and waits for the Killer to arrive.  She looks bad-ass (even if this is really-forced).
This all leads to a nice, Feminist battle between our heroines and the Killer.  He does toss them around alot, which is also a bit misogynistic.  Score?

On the plus side, we get a final Ending (which I won't SPOIL).  The End.
Eh, it's alright.  I feel the same about this one as I did the original, for the most part.  On one hand, it feels less 'been there, done that' as a whole.  The whole 'ripping off Halloween 2' aspect is not really a deal-breaker, as that was a good movie.  Again- I'm referring to the Carpenter-produced Version as opposed to the Not Even A Token Executive Producer Credit for John Carpenter Version.  The film does do some of its own things, so you could *possibly* consider this to be an Homage.  I mean, I don't, but that's me- a total dick.  The film presents many problems that I really, really need an answer to.  How did this guy survive?  How did he randomly revive like 2 days later?  How does he sneak around?  Does a neck really break like that?  Why is he super-strong?  All of these questions...will just remain, since I don't think that the terribly-reviewed Prequel will actually answer that.  For explaining less about how their Killer is unstoppable than Friday the 13th, this one squeaks by with my conditional blessing.  The film will appeal to fans of this kind of movie, but will do nothing to show you that Horror Films can be more than formulaic.  I'd be meaner...but I think Jannicke is mad enough at me...
Next up, I cover a film that I have been waiting five years to see.  As a bonus, I get to check Brazil off of my Film Bucket List!  Stay tuned...


  1. Hope you get to see the threequel soon, because I think you will hate it. Why? [Spoilers] It's a Prequel only in the first 10 minutes or so. The rest of the movie is just a remake of the first one... a BAD remake...

    1. Oh, so it is 'Wrong Turn 4?'

      Or does that film qualify as a Prequel within a Prequel?

      I will check out 'Prey 3'...if and when Netflix carries it. I'm not in a rush, really.