Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Indy Fun: Big Ass Spider!

It's all in the name, really.  Today's films is Big Ass Spider!  I could stop right there for alot of you, I'm sure.  There's much more to this film than its big, silly title.  If anything, it is actually the best part.  For me, it does a big thing and makes the 'Funny Title, Boring Film' Rule not a hard and fast one.  Finally!  Japan has been the only country to break that rule- see Robo-Geisha, Tokyo Gore Police, etc-, so it is nice to see us Yanks do it.  The film is about...well, you can figure it out.  Do I have to spell it out for you?  You want to know if this film is scary, funny or both.  Well, I will tell you...in the review.  Read on...
The film gets all arty and starts In Media Res.  How did we get to this point?  Well, that's what the remaining 80% of the movie is for, of course!
Oh and there's a Big Ass Spider on the U.S. Bank Building in Los Angeles.  I probably should mention that, I guess.
A mysterious corpse ends up in a Hospital.  This same Hospital houses our Exterminator hero- seen two pics above- after a housewife- Lin Shaye in a Cameo- accidentally gets him bit by a Spider (of normal size).
Holy shit- Ray Wise is here.  Him and Shaye were both in FDR: American Bad-Ass...but that's just a coincidence.  A weird one, mind you, but one all the same.
The Spider gets more big-ass when it escapes the Hospital and attacks a park.  It takes out one deserving victim (which I will cover in a future Poor Bastards of Cinema).  Holy Jurassic Park, Batman!
Said Spider gets REALLY big-ass eventually and terrorizes the whole city.

As a side-note, these bug effects must be making the folks behind Starship Troopers jealous.  They nailed it!
Our hero has teamed up with a Hospital Security Guard to take down the beast.  They're quite the comedic duo and they just might be up to the task.
Hmm...you may want to look behind you, Greg.  I'm just throwing that out there.
Will the Spider win?  Will the humans blow the shit out of it?  Will Los Angeles recover in time for the next Asylum film to assault it?  To find out, watch the movie.
This is actually another one of those films where I was expecting to be disappointed.  In all honesty, I wasn't.  The movie is not the most complex work of Fiction out there- not by a long shot.  It had a simple goal- be a bizarre and fun monster movie.  In that regard, it really succeeds.  It is weird, it is wacky and it is quite fun.  It doesn't skimp on the Horror side of it, which is nice.  Alot of these kinds of films are either scary or funny.  This film has a big, ugly monster and it doesn't hold back.  The body count on display is, well, quite large.  It will keep Poor Bastards of Cinema busy for awhile- count on it.  The film is a bit uneven at times, to be fair.  It's not perfect.  That said, it is a fun film that feels like a breath of fresh air when compared to all of the damn Remakes.  The closest thing this film does is target the same building as D-War...
Up next, a return to The Asylum!  There's a smaller budget, a dumber story and one monster design in this recent Mockbuster.  Stay tuned...

1 comment:

  1. Although it's directed by Mike Mendez, my expectations were pretty low, but eventually, it turned out to be really fun, really entertaining. Loved the Mexican(?) janitor and the opening scene is just awesome