Undead Pantheon: Evil

Every country needs their own zombie film. Italy has dozens (Zombi 2-5), England has a couple (28 Days Later) and even France has one (The Grapes of Death). Hell, even Australia has one (The Undead). So what happens when the great island nation of Greece made one? Find out in my review of...

To Kako (a.k.a. Evil)

The movie begins with a bunch of people in a cave digging up rocks. Faster than you can say 'let's rip-off Evil Dead II,' a P.O.V. force flies at one of the men. We cut to the man in a crowded soccer...I mean, futbol stadium. The evil power overtakes him and he bites a nearby man. A zombie plague breaks out very quickly and all hell breaks loose.

*

The movie basically sets up a bunch of random characters that will eventually meet up and fight zombies together. The problem is that almost none of them have what you would call 'personalities' or are 'likable.' We get a cab driver, a young woman and a soldier, amongst others. They start off strong by having the men leering at the lead young woman. Thanks, movie.

*

I have to point out the disparagement when it comes to the cover art of the DVD for a moment. The zombies look nowhere near as cool. Why would you do that to us, movie? I can almost forgive bad, but I can't forgive 'dishonest.' Back to the film...

*

The film has an odd habit of introducing some ideas and not really following up on them. One female lead is obsessed with getting home to save her little brother from her zombie dad. They risk life and limb to get there and...the film cuts to another location. We don't even get a good 'I'm sorry it was too late' speech. We also get a subplot involving another female lead's foot fetish. Say it with me- ewww. After surviving many attacks, she dies as a zombie licks her foot before eating it. That's lovely, movie.

*

The good stuff: this movie has some really cheesy gore effects. We get lots of splatter (the film clearly wants to be Bad Taste) and silliness. The ridiculous moment where they all stop to kung-fu fight the zombies is great. The high point is the guy punching through a zombie's chest and shaking a buddy's hand on the other side of the torso. Sadly, this is the only scene like this in the movie. After being so bad-ass, the guys go down so easy. Who can I forget the guy who gets gutted by a pole after being lightly shoved into it. Lame.

*

I won't spoil the ending to this movie. It is sort of moot, since the sequel is going to pick up right where this ends. At least, that is what the trailer tells us. Hopefully, the trailer is more trust-worthy than the DVD cover.

*

This movie is a big, steaming pile of 'Eh.' I really wanted to like this movie, but it tried so hard to dissuade me. Compared to other zombie movies, this is a sad attempt to get attention- even more so than Zombi 4. I hope that more can be done with the storyline in the sequel and, to be fair, it does look more ambitious. Maybe you guys should just stick to what you do best: being the inspiration for 6,000 bad sword-and-sandal films. Where would Steve Reeves be without you? It's not like he turned down the lead in Dr. No to be in one of those movies. Oh right, he did.

*

Let's jump back to aliens again. I hear there's a new guy out there to fight them. Sounds good. Stay tuned...