Two questions: first, does this title inspire any confidence? Second, how many people are actually aware of just how many of these films people made? Even with the third film, I am barely touching the tip of the iceberg. I'll get to some of those in due time. Is there anything special about this movie aside from the 3-D aspect. Read and find out in my review of...
The film begins with a couple having a seance for their dead son. The whole thing turns pretty weird, hitting all the notes: glowing lights, flickering power and possessed voice. But, there is one problem: it is all fake. Even more fake than everything else in the movie, that is. Our 'couple' it seems is actually a pair of ghost/myth de-bunkers. Take that, plot of The Reaping! This film needs something to ruin all the fun though.
*
Like another 3-D horror film, the film bogs itself down with family melodrama. Basically, the lead and his wife are split-up and always fighting over their teenage daughter. The dad buys up the famed Amityville house against her wishes. Her friend (Meg Ryan) is trying to push her to loosen up and have some fun. This will certainly end well.
*
The non-family plot breaks down like this: people show up to the house or leave the house, somethings scares/kills them and people react. Highlights include the guy who is killed by flies (no, really) and the woman who is impaled by a metal beam through a window...and then explodes into flames. Even using 3-D in this scene does not allow it to make sense. Did she go through spontaneous combustion at the same time? Why the hell did that happen?
*
There are some interesting things to note. One thing is that they allow killings to happen outside of the house. Unfortunately, this is done by way of...fly angels of death. Yeah, I don't get it either. They also dare to kill off a main character before the third act that you would not expect. But they do not show it- at all. Good job, movie!
*
In case you had not noticed, I have not said much about the 3-D effects. Like Parasite, the effects are nearly non-existent here. Why did you put it in the title if you don't want to use it? I mean, why would you...holy shit, they are making up for it now! The finale involves at least a dozen effects, as well as wire effects, falling objects and more dry ice than a Def Leppard concert. Way to overcompensate, guys! It all ends in a surprisingly bleak manner and in a way that makes it appear to be the last film. Yeah...that was as successful as Friday the 13th: Part Four- The Final Chapter. Final my ass!
*
This movie is honestly not that terrible. It has some serious faults (seriously, why did they kill this character off-camera) that hamper it. They take some risks (leaving the house), but there is not enough pay-off. It tends to raise more questions than it answers. Seriously, how does the house kill you miles away or affect elevators? I should not have enough time to stop and think about questions like this. If you wanted to see a good 3-d horror film, you obviously had a long wait ahead of you. Next.
*
I should probably stop talking about the Amityville films. Then again, I am nuts. Stay tuned...
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