Tubi Thursday: Queen Crab (2015)

 As a Celebration of Women and their History, why not cover a Film about a lady crab?

I can't think of a reason.

The Director of Arachnia and A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell gives us this Film.

A Scientist- played by Mark Polonia the Director of Feeders 2 and Amityville in Space- is working on making things grow bigger.

He's terrible at this, but also good at it.  He made some fruit that makes things grow, but his daughter feeds it to her new pet crab for apparently months.

The top of the House blows up and kills the Parents (even though they were in the Basement).

In the Present (which we're told via a 'funny' Title Card) the Crab is now a Giant and by a Town full of terrible people.

* The Sheriff is lazy, while the Deputy is a dumb jerk.

* The girl is now a paranoid loner who shoots the Deputy with zero consequences.
* A different, older Lady is exactly the same.
* The girl's long-lost friend is a B-Movie Star (in a B-Movie).

They call in an Expert (who looks like an older Chad Gable) and they slowly figure out that there is a Giant Crab.

Lots of filler.  The Film is only 80 minutes long.

The crab- which is the same level of Claymation from Arachnia (only made 12 years later)- kills some people, but also has some sort of psychic link to the girl/adult.

Instead of showing you said effects, here's a shot from over 50 years ago that looks better.

Sorry, Brett Piper, who is the Writer/Director and VFX guy.

To find out what happens, watch the Film on Tubi.

It's...not good.  It tries to be a fun B-Movie, which is a thing that alot of people like.  Someone keeps giving these people money to make stuff like Sharkula, Noah's Shark and Zillafoot.  That or he has Mob ties.

The Plot is pretty nothing and has lots of random filler.  Did I mention that it's not even 90 minutes?  This is early Full Moon stuff, where they'd make Films that barely hit 60 minutes, but put a Making Of... thing on the Tapes/DVDs to make it appear longer.  Yea.

Queen Crab's Claymation/Stop-Motion effects are decent in a throwback sort of way.  If it were just that and not several terrible Green Screen shots, I'd be more forgiving.  With barely any Story of note to make you feel connected, it's just a slog with old-school effects.

The Queen is dead.

A B-Movie that isn't as a fun as it should be.  It's also not good enough to stand on its own...so win/win?