Wes is More: Cursed (2005)

 No Film has truly lived up to its name quite like this one.  2005's Cursed should have been a major thing.  It was Wes Craven doing his first (and sadly only) Werewolf Film.

So why is it only known for delays, reshoots and Studio Interference?

Well, the Film began production in 2003, but Reshoots and Rewrites happened.  Some of them excised whole Characters!  One bit with Shannon Elizabeth is dubbed over because she was calling out to a *different character* when they shot it!

On top of that, the Ending was changed due to the Producers- the Weinsteins.  I don't have to explain why one of them (if not both) are bad at this point, right?

That aside, the Film has Werewolves, current Stars, future Stars and a weird place in pop culture.  To find out how it all went wrong (or right?), read on...

Two young ladies- Mya and Shannon Elizabeth (who gets Above the Title Billing!)- meet a Fortune Teller- Portia De Rossi?!?- who warns them of death.

The pair are then separated, because Plot...and Reshoots.

It is this Scene that involves the aforementioned ADR, as she was originally calling for someone else after Mya left her.

She was cast in the Reshoots.

Meanwhile, our Heroine- Christina Ricci- is happy, in love with Joshua Jackson (also recast in the Reshoots, but more on that later) and has a Brother- Jesse Eisenberg (who is playing 17 here, despite being born the same year as me)- who she has to take care of.

I have to exposition dump as smoothly as the Film did.

She picks Jesse up from...the middle of town, I guess and they drive home.

Something runs across their hood and they crash into Elizabeth's car, making hers roll down a hill.

After a prolonged rescue Scene, she is...eaten by a Werewolf.

Again- Above the Title Billing, folks.

In the rescue Scene, the duo are wounded by the Werewolf and begin to feel side effects.

Ricci has silly stuff like super smelling and the ability to catch a fly, while Eisenberg gets to rip off An American Werewolf in London by waking up naked, albeit outside the House.

Ricci works the anachronistic job as a Pre-Interviewer for The Late Show with Craig Kilborn...which ended the year before this came out.  Thanks, Reshoots.

Her B-Plot brings in another Arrested Development Cast Member in Judy Greer, who's the Publicist for Scott Baio.

Yes, this Film features Scott Baio.  Why?!?

Eisenberg's Plot involves him gaining confidence and vague super-powers that helps him deal with his Bully- Milo Ventimiglia.  It is basically just Tobey Macguire in Spider-Man.

In a weird twist, his Bully who keeps calling him 'gay' shows up and reveals to Eisenberg that he's actually Gay.

He closes the door and reacts to this Plot Twist the same way that I did.

A series of killings- will I get more Poor Bastards of Cinema?- at the hands of a Werewolf occur while all of this is going on.

Who's behind it?

Well, prepare for all of the Plot Twists in Act 3...

For starters, Jackson is actually a Werewolf and infected Greer, who has been nothing but a minor nuisance so far.

She was actually the Werewolf this whole time- good luck making sense of the timing of the killings- and a big fight ensues.

We get brief glimpses of the original Rick Baker make-up before she is killed.

...but we're not done yet.

Thanks to the Weinsteins, the Ending was rewritten to have Jackson as the real villain at the end, wanting to kill Eisenberg.

This led to original Lead Skeet Ulrich dropping out, as he'd already done this in Scream...which is why they demanded this change.

He's killed and NOW everyone can live happily ever after.  The End.

A Film that I actually liked- to a point, anyhow.  Does the Film feel disjointed?  Yes.
Is it terrible?  No.

The final turns of the Film are truly the weakest parts.  They don't really explain too much of what needs to happen for the Third Act to make sense.  We get to know that Greer dated Jackson- granted.  Does she feel like an important character otherwise before the end- no.

The parts where they build up our Heroes going through the transformation is nice, to a point.  As stated, Eisenberg's is literally just the one from Spider-Man, just with no moral or lesson.  Ricci's is fine, but she never really transforms.

Is it weird that both of them are 'cursed,' but neither of them ever fully transforms.  For that matter, neither does Jackson- at least that we see.  Maybe that's him who runs across the road, but it is definitely supposed to be Greer who kills Shannon Elizabeth.

If you look into the Film, we apparently 'know' that a whole bunch of Wes Craven's footage is in a vault or something somewhere, but there are no plans to release it.  Could it be as good as The Cabal Cut or is it another Snyder Cut?

We may never know.  Thanks again, Harvey Weinstein.

If you haven't seen Cursed, see it for yourself and decide.  I couldn't decide which Cameo to highlight...so let's do both.

Here's Craig Kilborn.

******

...and yes, that is pre-'Parks & Recreation' Nick Offerman.

Next up, Bob's Birthday Review for me.  His sacrifice is my gain as we watches a Film that I would have eventually tricked myself into watching later.  See you then...