Tubi Thursday: Escape Plan 3- The Extractors (2019)

 I recently wrapped up the Ong Bak Trilogy with Tubi Thursday.

Why not do that with the Escape Plan Series too?

As a reminder, Sly called Part 2 ''TRULY THE MOST HORRIBLY PRODUCED FILM I ever had the misfortune to be in?!?'

I have high hopes!

A Chinese Businesswoman is kidnapped by some bad guys.  Why?

Well, the original Escape Plan Film made about 5x as much in China as it did in the U.S.

Oh, you mean why did they kidnap her?

Well, the bad guy- Devon Sawa- wants revenge on Stallone for killing his Dad (Vincent D'onofrio in Archival Footage).

I hope you like the color yellow, by the way.

The Crew is called in to save her.

Well, not most of them...and 50 Cent doesn't go with them.  In fact, we never see him after his 2nd Scene.

A man representing the Company her Father owned is there, along with her failed bodyguard.

Guess what- one of them is Chinese.  Shocking.

Jamie King has moved up from Lady Who Works at the Computers to Lady Who Wants to Go on the Mission.

Also she's Stallone's Girlfriend.  She's only 33 years younger.

Oh right- she's his Girlfriend, so she's kidnapped by the bad guy.

Shocking.

Taking bets on if she makes it to the end.  Any takers?  Who wants to support a longshot?!?

Can our Heroes rescues the innocent lady?

Can they make you forget that they are breaking into Shawshank (seriously, it is the same Prison for the exterior)?

More importantly, can they make the Film not feel cheap when it has 16% of the Budget of the last one?

To find out, stream the Film.

I guess I knew what to expect, didn't I?

So here's the thing: this is a Sequel to the Stallone-Schwarzenegger Film.  The latter is not in this.  The Plot is barely the same.  It exists to build Chinese Action Stars, since it was funded by Chinese Investment Companies.

Here's a thought: don't make it an Escape Plan Film.  Just make an Action Film with Stallone doing 2 fight Scenes and build it around other people.

When you make it a Sequel, you invite all of the comparisons.

For what its worth, ES 2 felt like a similar Film at points.  This one does not.

For starters, nobody breaks OUT of a Prison.  Everyone is just breaking INTO a Prison.

Also it's not a super Prison (a la Fortress 2) this time- it's just a rusty, old one in Ohio.

On the positive side, there are a few good Fight Scenes in this one, including one with Daniel Bernhardt and Batista fights a guy who's real las name is (de) Groot.

Other than that, it is pretty nothing.  Sorry, Umbrella Man.

A Film that, for me, was worse than the 2nd one.  At least that one had a Super Prison and wasn't so forgettable.