In spite of what people might think, I'm not simply a Marvel Fan.
I'm a Comic Book Fan that really wants to see them come to life.
So why is this one a nightmare for me?
He got pretty much no setup in his previous appearances, so they front-load the Intro to tell you about him, his personality and just how he is in general.
Sadly, the answer to all three is Ezra Miller.
He runs into action to clean up the vague mess that Batman left behind- somehow a robbery ends up with a Hospital collapsing- and has to rescue a bunch of babies.
They're worse CGI monstrosities than the one in Twilight, complete with failing to match up to the Quicksilver bits from the Fox Films.
It's great if you like the blurry yellow textures though.
I hope you enjoyed Wonder Woman- she won't show up again.
I hope you enjoyed the rehash of the Lasso of Truth joke too. Sadly, we got to see that twice.
A sad, desperate Barry decides to- in spite of warnings- go back in time to save his Mother.
Who killed her?
Well...the Film doesn't say. It doesn't rhyme with 'Rehearse Dash' though.
Well...the Film doesn't say. It doesn't rhyme with 'Rehearse Dash' though.
A mysterious speedster bumps Barry out of the time stream and right to, conveniently enough, the day that he got his powers.
Oh joy- there's two of him.
This also happens to be the day that General Zod shows up too, only this time there is no Kal-El.
And yes, they do retcon Barry into being in Metropolis too. Sigh.
With the other Justice League Members not around- for no explainable reason- he goes to get help from Batman...but it is Nostalgia...I mean, Tim Burton's Batman.
To paraphrase a quote from Michael Caine on Keaton's behalf, 'The Movie wasn't good, but the House it bought was amazing.'
Alongside a barely explained (or important) Supergirl, Flash, More Annoying Flash and '89 Batman try to save the day.
What happens when that doesn't work?
To find out, stream the Film (if you must).
A Film that spent way too long in development to turn out like this.
How has this been in some phase of Production since 2014?!?
Putting aside the fact that this was released after people knew that the DCEU in its current state was ending, this Film is just not good.
Ezra Miller.
Even if he was an amazing Actor (he's not), he's so bad at this role. He plays the most annoying Flash I've ever seen or heard...until he plays Young Barry (aka him with bangs) and tops himself. So much of the Film is about him and there's just no getting away from how bad it is.
Even if he was an amazing Actor (he's not), he's so bad at this role. He plays the most annoying Flash I've ever seen or heard...until he plays Young Barry (aka him with bangs) and tops himself. So much of the Film is about him and there's just no getting away from how bad it is.
And yes, there's also the creepy and criminal stuff too.
Why they decided to lose $200 million on this and blip Batgirl out before anyone could see it is a decision that will (and should) haunt the Studio forever.
Why they decided to lose $200 million on this and blip Batgirl out before anyone could see it is a decision that will (and should) haunt the Studio forever.
They try to compensate by doing this weird mix of Nostalgia Bating (with Wonder Woman and then Keaton) and Legacy Sequel (with the new Supergirl). It gets worse with the CGI corpses of previous Actors and even the exploitation of the one that actually agreed to take part (see below).
It is bad.
It is really bad.
It is really bad.
It looks bad, sounds bad, feels bad and just makes me feel bad for watching it.
As a last-ditch attempt to seem impartial, here's one shot of Miller as Flash that isn't awful. Take what you can get here, folks.
A Film that could have been saved, but it would have required actual care. I really wonder why Tom Cruise said that this was great.
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