New Streaming: Creepshow- 'Stranger Sings'

 After a natural disaster managed to mostly miss us, I might as well catch up on some scares.

In this Segment, a man hears a Siren's call- literally!

A man and a woman have an awkward meet-cute for the ages.

She invites him in, but he thinks that he's being 'gentlemanly' by turning her down.

Before he gets very far, he hears some singing from her House.

It literally stops him in his tracks and makes him then come in.

He eventually learns what is going on and, well, it's weird.

The lady on the left is a Siren- a real one.  No joke.
The lady on the right wants to be a Siren.

They want him to do an operation to make it happen.

Will he do it?
Can he do it?

How will things end for him?

To find out, stream it now on Shudder.

A good segment that plays with conventions and feels a bit different from an old-school Creepshow Segment.  I'm saying that as a positive, as making them all the same would make things quite boring, no?

I obviously won't SPOIL the twists and turns of the Story here.

I enjoyed the Acting here, as our Lead played a nice 'everyman' here without resorting too much to cliché or parody.  It's a fine line.  The other Actors are good here too, giving the roles a bit of nuance.  It's not easy to do that in the truncated time-frame here, so kudos.

If you like Creepshow for the creatures AND the variety, you should enjoy this one too.  If you don't, just don't tell her!

Next time, some political commentary mixed in with some odd ideas.  It's a dark future for us all.  See you then...

Tubi Thursday: The Brain Eaters (1958)

 An act of God named Ian has kept me from going to Illinois (for now).  To get my fix, here's a forgotten Sci-Fi Thriller shot and set in Illinois.

If the Story feels familiar, just wait.  It's...

A Couple drive into Riverdale, Illinois, but find nothing but dead animals, missing people and...

…some sort of metal capsule.

A bunch of military guys and Scientists investigate.

This is one of those Films with LOTS of narrations to fill in the gaps dialog-wise, so its basically like watching the Film with me describing the Plot here.  Hurray?

A strange man is walking around with a strange object as well.

We see people get attacked- like at a Military Blockade-, the man arrives and then they get up like nothing happened.

Figure out what this is yet?

The Lead Scientist sees his Dad act strangely and then they find strange bite marks on the back of his neck.  What is the source of it?

He studies a strange furry object that they found by him and it latches onto his arm, so he has to burn it off.

So, to be clear, this is an adaptation of The Puppet Masters, a story that wouldn't get an official adaptation until 1994.  It would also get a shout-out in The Faculty as being 'better' than Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

Our Heroes try to contact help, but the lines are controlled by alien-controlled humans.  That's how you do the 'No Signal' Cliché in 1958.

Sorry, no Satellites for you.

They figure out that they must destroy the cone on its own.

In the Climax, they meet Dr. Cole, who is the oldest of the controlled humans.  He's played by...Leonard Nimoy...in a long beard and wig?!?

Our Hero's Lady is controlled as well and she tries to stop him at the last moment.  He manages to electrocute the Cone, killing the aliens, but he dies alongside her.

Oh well, our Secondary Lead- from the beginning- can celebrate.  The End.

A pretty fun, but also kind of dry Sci-Fi Film.  There's nothing bad here.  It has good Acting, decent effects (the creatures only show up like 3x), some Action and a good Plot.  It's based on a good Story, so that last part was a given.

The odd thing is just how much Narration you get and how much feels like it happens after the fact.  Looking back, the fact that our Lead isn't narrating should have been a clue, huh?  Why do they do this?  Does it add to the Story?  Is it how the Book is written?

Whatever the reason, this makes the Film feel more like a Sci-Fi version of Dragnet?  If that works for you, great.  As for me, I'd just like the Story told in full without this weird flourish.

The Brain Eaters is a good Film with some odd choices made.  That said, I'd still recommend it AND the Film that it was apparently a Double-Feature with...

Seriously, why is there so much Narration as a Post-Script?!?  Otherwise, the Film is quite good and has a Leonard Nimoy role before Star Trek.

South DeCoteau: The Brotherhood (2001)

 David DeCoteau- have I really liked a Film of yours since Puppet Master 3?  I'm too lazy to check, so I'm going with 'Probably not.'  Let's see if that can change.

The Year 2001 brought us many things and The Brotherhood was, in fact, one of them.  No time for grandeur or verbosity with a Hurricane near me.  The Film is about the worst kind of Sorority- the kind that is just all dudes, is actually a Fraternity and is also a bunch of Vampires.

We're in the 'forget everything you know about Creature X' time in Cinema, so enjoy new, confusing rules.  The Cast includes a bunch of people who work all of the time, but, to be honest, you won't necessarily know from one thing specifically.  Well, at least not until now.

To find out if releasing a Film 2 weeks after 9/11 (that's the actual release date!) was a good idea, read on...

In the Cold Open, a guy is confronted by weirdos who wear their sunglasses at night (the Corey Harts?) and killed for 'rejecting them.'

Ooh...mysterious.  Now we know who the bad guys are, so...not mysterious, I guess.

Our Hero is a Jock who we first see Gaslighting his new roommate as a joke.  Classy fella.

The duo hit it off in the Jock-Nerd way that happens in Films and TV.

The guys from earlier walk around in a manner eerily similar to those same Vampires in Twilight, although the first Book wouldn't come out until 4 years after this.

David would have a case...if this wasn't super-duper cliché.

Our Heroes meet a young lady who nearly banters them to death before inviting them to a Party by the Vampires...after our Hero already turned down a direct invite.

Not suspicious at all.

Sadly, the Actress here only has 3 Credits and this is the 2nd.  I wonder what she's up to?

The duo get separated with the girl leaving the party alongside Nerd Friend.

Our Hero seems to slowly lose his whole 'I'm independent' schtick and starts doing whatever the Vampire asks him to.

This escalates to the point where the guy sucks blood from hand, as you do.

This- and him drinking some in return- changes our Hero, who starts wearing sunglasses during the day now (as part of his transition to Corey Hart-ing, obviously).  He also starts hanging out with the Vampires and generally acting worse.

This leads Nerd Friend to sneak into the Frat House and find a not-so-hidden book detailing how the group are about 100 years old.

I guess you need to keep that around, you know, in case you forget.  You aren't exactly a young man anymore.

He's enticed to the 'dark side' quite quickly (it took 45 minutes to get past the Party Scene) and engages in what I think is a Vampire Threesome.

Him and the Head Vampire both feed on a willing lady and, since this is a David DeCoteau Film, they are in their underwear for this.

Nerd Friend seeks help and goes the girl, who's been missing for the last 30 minutes of Film.  They break into the Frat and confront the Head Vampire, who's about to steal our Hero's body.

Betrayal- the girl was in on it the whole time.

Very bad at betrayal, she can't hold Nerd Friend still, who takes the axe back from her and kills the Head Vampire.

This kills everyone but our Hero, since, in his words, he 'never joined the Frat.'  I mean...he did, but whatever.  The End.

A pretty inoffensive and by-the-numbers affair.  The Brotherhood isn't one of those 'so bad it is good' Films.  It's not amateurish.  It's not super low-budget.

In other words, it is a pretty basic Direct-to-Video Film.  There's probably more 'beefcake' stuff due to the Director, but it is not at the point of the 1313 Films.  He definitely has a thing for Swimmers, as Leeches taught us.  

Of course, this Film never actually *shows* our Hero swimming...which is odd.

The Plot here is nothing that impressive.  A pretty simple guy is confronted by temptation, gives into it and, well, faces zero repercussions for doing so.  Take note, kids!

For a Vampire Film, there's not much of that content to please its fans.  The one big Scene is pretty much it.  Oh well.

The Brotherhood is...alright, but at least they didn't drag things out to a ridiculous degree with multiple Sequels, right?  Right?!?

Next up, the first Sequel (and the only one I actually have).  Will it have the magic to improve things?  Stay tuned...

*Not New* Streaming: The Man Who Killed Don Quixote (2018)

 After 29 years, a man's passion project was realized.  The result: applause at Cannes.
Not much response anywhere else.

Let's see if Gilliam's Film was worth the wait (and multiple Castings)…

In Spain, a struggling Director- Adam Driver- is trying to make a project based on Don Quixote.

I'd say that we're getting META, but we've only just begun.

Frustrated, he's given inspiration via a random guy selling a DVD Copy of a Film he made about Quixote 10 years ago.
Yes, he had already made the Film...and just forgot about it, apparently.

We see bits of him making the Film and, apparently, bangs make you look 10 years younger.  Free advice, ladies.

He goes back to the Village he shot that Film in, since he was mere miles away.  What a coincidence!

He sees that things aren't great for the people he left behind.
Whoops.

Through a series of events, he ends up back with his original Quixote Actor (Jonathan Pryce), who now believes that he's the real guy.

On top of that, Driver can't quite distinguish fantasy from reality himself anymore.

In lieu of SPOILERS, here's Promo Art for when the Film was supposed to Co-Star Michael Palin in the Pryce role.

I kind of want to see that now.

To see how it plays out, stream/rent the Film now.

An interesting Film that is 1,000% a Terry Gilliam Film.  That's both high praise and a warning, depending on how you are.

I stand by alot of his Films- specifically Time Bandits and Baron Munchausen- but the results can be mixed- like The Zero Theorem.  The man is genuinely-creative and aims for the stars.  Actually getting there...can be a tricky proposition.

I honestly wonder how much this one changed over the nearly 3 Decades since the original pitch.  In 2002's Lost in La Mancha (the Making Of that become a Not Making Of Film), the story seems to be a bit different.  I've seen the Film pitched as a Time Traveler going back to meet with Quixote, which sounds great.  That's what the version with Johnny Depp and Jean Rochefort was going to be, I think.

This version...has some good moments, but his penchant for adding realism and wanting to 'de-mystify' everything can be an impediment.  It works in Jabberwocky, since it is blatantly-telling you the 'real' version of a crazy Story/Poem, grime and all.  This version...is interesting to a point, but kind of lost me.

Speaking of lost, I originally tried watching the digital copy I had from 2019, but it was the Italian release.  While mostly-unchanged from the copy on Hulu (since it was shot 98% in English), one thing doesn't work there...

At this point, he goes to shove away the on-screen English Subtitles.

…which aren't on this copy.  Whoops.

A must see for fans of Terry Gilliam...but it's a hard sell to most other people.  At its worst, its vague and murky.

Tubi Thursday: Python Island (2021)

 I might as well get one more Not Syfy Channel Film out of this before October begins.

It is China vs. Snakes in...

A young boy is lost on a place called Cannibal Island and the Village must go rescue him.

The whole Plot hinges upon him and his Uncle coming 'too close' to the place.  Maybe avoid a place called CANNIBAL ISLAND!

They discover killer plants, lots of snakes and one big Snake (which is actually a Cobra).

They make it back and, gee, this is a short Film.

Oh...now his Mom died from a snake bite...while the villain didn't.  Ouch.

He raises a baby Python (there it is!) in his grief, but eventually has to set ashore towards Cannibal Island.

This all seems wrapped up now...

...oh, now we have a time jump (after a Title Card that they didn't translate from Mandarin) and the boy is a young Scientist.

As luck (and lazy Writing) would have it, his Company wants the Plants from Cannibal Island.

Double luck (for him, at least) comes in the form of the Island Residents being sick...for some reason.

Time to go back to Cannibal...er, Python Island.

Now accompanied by Security, the corrupt Village Elder, his Family, the Love Interest AND his Boss (also the Love Interest's Mom), he returns to uncover the mystery.

It's from 2021, so I won't SPOIL too much.

To find out how this turned out, stream away.

Another Film that is not exactly what is promised...but it is still better than the Kraken Film.  In place of too much CGI, they use wandering around an Island (Set), some traps and usually 'Adventurer stuff.'  It's still better than replacing a cool monster with one guy in a lizard mask.

That said, the Film still isn't great.  It's one of those Films that is both overly and under-ambitious. 
It is the former when it tries to cover a whole Plot with a lost civilization, snakes, snake scales that turn into plants and other such bollocks.  They just keep saying things and hope that you find it interesting and agree.

In the latter, the Island feels way too small and like a bunch of a Sound Stages out of Land of the Lost.

There are good ideas in this ones and some good Acting (albeit dubbed into English), so it's not a waste.  Just like this opening Teaser with no payoff, it's just kind of there.

A silly Film that can be fun when it isn't melodramatic.  It's a decent time-waster, especially since it still isn't even 90 minutes.

New Streaming: Candyman (2021)

 After missing this in Theaters (I mean- it was a Theater in 2021...), I saw it on Prime.

Is this Remake that's actually a Sequel (SPOILER?) worth checking out?  Read on...

Back in the '70s a man was accused of putting razor blades in candy and got killed by the Cops.

Oops, he was innocent.  

Oh well- that certainly won't be a factor in the Plot...

In the Present day (of 2019, since they didn't update the year via ADR), an Artist is looking for new inspiration, as he hasn't made a work in 2 Years.

Will he find new inspiration from around him?

He learns about Candyman and an incident involving a Social Worker who seems to have gone crazy in the early '90s.

Like all Artists, he's ready to break & enter into Buildings and use Micro Fiche.

As he learns more about the story, weird things start to happen to him.

For starters, he's stung by a bee and that wound is getting worse.
He's also scared in the world's most reflective Elevator too.

Why is he being targeted?

As Candyman killings start to happen again, his notoriety grows.  Why?  It all connects to his art.

Is there more of a connection than he could believe though?

Can he solve the mystery before more people die?

What is Candyman up to?
Can anyone be saved?

To find out, stream the Film now.

A good Film that is much more of a slow burn than a bloody affair.  That's not to say that there's no blood- I mean, just look at the last Screen Cap I used!  It's just much less of a Film about Candyman killing people than it is about a Character's Arc.

In many ways, it is similar to a Film like Ringu, which is all about solving the mystery in time, while horrific things also happen.

The Marketing was a bit confusing here, as the Film is not exactly the Remake/Reboot that it seems like they were promising.  Without getting deep into the more juicy Plot details, it clearly connects to the original Film.  It seems to ignore the Sequels, which is what most of the Godzilla Films tended to do.

The final product is quite good, provided you find yourself drawn into the exploration of hard Themes, Racial Justice, gentrification and the Art World.  It takes a while to get to the real good stuff, but just go along with the work of those pulling the strings...

A good Film that delivers a psychological Horror experience than an overt one.  The final product is a good, if divisive one.

New Streaming: She-Hulk- Attorney at Law- Episode 4

 As the Internet gets mad at *checks list* everything, let's watch something we can all agree on.

Just kidding, it's...

A Stage Magician has a hard time impressing Audiences in a World where real Magic exists.

His only solution (well, the one he tries): using a sling ring to put people in danger!

Wong wants him to stop using real magic so dangerously, since he was a former student (and Seth Rollins' Stunt Double).

Can they win the case?

Fun Fact: the guy on the right is the Oldest Actor ever cast in a Marvel Property at 102 years old.

Food for thought, eh, Jamie Lee Curtis?

At the same time, Jen is trying to find love via Online Dating.

She finds more luck doing it as She-Hulk- naturally.

How well the 2 Plots intersect?

To find out, stream the Episode now.

A fun Episode with the fresh taste of Wong.  Hmm...was that more dirty than I had in mind?

The Plot here is fun and fresh, using the Courtroom just the right amount.  It has magic.  It has creatures.  It has She-Hulk punching creatures.

The B-Plot with She-Hulk/Jen dating is a nice one, featuring a random David Otunga.  Between him and Seth Rollins on Tubi Thursday, I'm running into Wrestlers in the oddest places.  Also David Otunga has an actual Law Degree from Harvard, so, naturally, he doesn't play a Lawyer.  Huh?!?

After last week's twerking incident, it's nice to see how the Internet can't get mad about...Sopranos SPOILERS from at least 15 years ago?  The hell?!?

Next time, another case and this one is personal.  Also I learn what the word 'Drip' means nowadays.  See you then...