Today's Film is the '85 'classic' Evils of the Night, a Sci-Fi/Horror Film. It is now Streaming in trashy HD on Amazon Prime, so let me finally put a Film to that Poster...
Two men kidnap a couple and they wake up in a weird Hospital. The guy escapes, but is blasted by a beam from a Nurse's ring!
As we get more people taken by masked men, it gets to be really obvious who's behind it.
In a College Town, a bunch of random people- and Porn Stars- are hanging out at the River.
Some have characterization and names, but others are just there to show their tits. '80s!
These 2 Mechanics are obviously the culprits, since they wear masks...and their uniforms- which have Name Tags on them!
It turns out the pair are working for a trio of aliens- played by Julie Newmar, John Carradine and Tina Louise, seen below- that need teenage blood to save their race.
They actually just need anyone's, but they think that teenagers will survive the ordeal. None of them do, however, so...um...what?
Can our remaining 'teens' survive the attack of the Aliens- who never leave the Hospital- and the Mechanics?
Or will the *sigh* old men somehow defeat all of our Heroes and get their reward?
To find out, stream the Film. It's streaming now, weirdos!
A product of its time- for better or worse. First, let me cover the positives. The cheesy effects- reused shots from Battlestar: Galactica, apparently- and silly framing devices are fun. The Film is very, very dated in a fun way too. The hair, the music, the clothes- all dated gloriousness. The fact that John Carradine is here to say crazy, serious-sounding stuff alongside Julie Newmar is a bonus. Now the bad part- just about everything else. The stuff with Porn Stars is just on the hair of being too sleazy for even a Film like this. It's a fine line, but I think this Film crosses it ever so slightly. Secondly, the Film barely leans into the Sci-Fi aspect. The crux of the Film is these Aliens, but all they do is sit in a 'Hospital,' occasionally use a laser ring and then leave. If this was Aliens come to Earth and use, say, a Robot or a Creature to collect the targets, that would be one thing. Instead, it is *sigh* two old dudes. Obvious question- how are they so tough? On SNL, they joked that The Mule was a Superhero Film for Seniors, since he could drive so well and have sex. This is kind of the same thing. The men- famous Character Actors Aldo Ray and Neville Brand- are just two old guys who continually out-quick, out-smart and overpower full grown 'teens.' They also- mild SPOILER- can both shrug off very serious wounds and somehow get stronger after them! Ultimately, the Film sacrifices any truly interesting ideas for weak Slasher Heavies and a Story that favors a body count over hopefulness. It also is the only Film credited to the Actress below, even though she made the cover. Is there a story there?
A trashy, silly Film that doesn't quite gel for me. If it was more fun and less misogynistic, it would be an easy, cheesy recommendation.
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