Saturday, February 25, 2023

'90s Trash: The Wasp Woman (1995)

 Before I do a long-needed Omnibus for a Series of Corman-adjacent Films, I need to check this one off of the list.

Do you remember a Film called The Wasp Woman?  Neither do I.
That 1959 Film was Remade in 1995- weird number flip there, no?  Does that mean that a descendant of George Lucas will remake Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull in 2080?  Sign me up!

The Plot involves a woman dealing with aging in the only logical way possible- injecting herself with an experimental formula.  This is before Botox became a thing, so that tracks!

As you can guess from the Title, things don't go well.  Will this Showtime-produced Remake go better?  To find out, read on...

In the Cold Open, a random lady decides to ignore a warning about Wasps in the area to go on a jog...in that looks like a one-piece bathing suit.  Okay.

She's killed, so is she the Title Character?
Nope.   None of that mattered- at all.

The actual Title Character is this Model/Business Owner who shows off her own products, but is, gasp, aging.

She hears the Assistant Photographer bad-mouthing her and... just kind of gets sad.
On top of that, they need an Investor- for reasons unexplained- and he also wants a 'new, fresh face' for the brand.

That guy on the right is a classic That Guy Actor, most notably for being in lots of Jim Wynorski Films.
A Scientist is testing some sort of formula involving yadda yadda wasp venom yadda yadda reversing aging.  Do you really think that tracks?

Our Heroine is interested, but wants concrete proof, so he tests it on an alley cat.
Said cat becomes a kitten within a day, so she agrees to help fund the research...and test it on herself.

Unbeknownst to her, said kitten has now become...giggle...a cat-wasp (basically a big, furry wasp).

It *kind of* attacks the guy who was mean to it once and was bringing in the Wasps to test on (and the only connection to that random Opening Kill).

Said attack makes him swerve...and another car swerves and a big explosion?!?
Within a couple of days, the serum works on our Heroine and everyone fawns over her new (read: actual face without make-up) look.

At a bar, she runs across the guy who called her old-looking and takes him home for 'snoo-snoo.'

She transforms- in a very 90s way, it happens via digital morphing- into a full-on Wasp Woman!
She goes on a slow, but steady ramage of killing the men in her life that were kind of awful to her.

That includes her Second-in-Command (who tried to steal secrets) and the Investor guy.
Her great and helpful boyfriend- who's also named Alec- knows that something is wrong and manages to stop her from killing the young Model they hired to replace her.

They say that they will figure things out.

The End?
Nope- she decides to go after the Assistant (who she once imagined was hitting on Alec) and tries to kill her...in a Cave. 
Just go with it.

She realizes how much she has done and changed as the duo run from her...before the Assistant runs back with dynamite to blow her up.

What a pal. 
The End.
Was it great?  No, it's a Jim Wynorski Creature Feature that was made for Showtime.
Was it good?  Same answer.

That's not to say that there was NOTHING good here.  There was some stuff to like.

Jennifer Rubin- when she's not turning into a monster- is good here, playing both sad and over-the-moon happy at different times.  The Actors all do a good to decent job here.

The big draw is, of course, the Special Effects.  I appreciated the use of Practical F/X to make the creature.  That morph- while not terrible- does date the Film quite a bit.  Other than the fact that they gave the giant Wasp cleavage, it's quite nice.

I take alot of issues with the logistics here.  Why does she never transform partway- like growing antennae or wings- and only fully into a creature?  Would that transition effect be too expensive?

Another little issue- the Soundtrack.  They have like 2 pieces of 'dramatic music,' so it gets kind of tiresome to hear by the end.

All in all, the Film is about what you'd expect.  They throw in random 'Skinemax' Sex Scenes that are otherwise pointless, tell a silly Plot and nobody learns anything.  Oh, Hi Director!
Next up, let's return to form.  Let's see what I can dig up.  Stay tuned...

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