Tubi Thursday: Yeti- The Giant of the 20th Century (1977)

 After skipping it last week for time issues, I'm ready for a giant monster.

It's a King Kong rip-offs from the King of Rip-Offs from the '70s and '80s- Italy.  Continuare a leggere...

As some Icebergs melt- sure glad that stopped, right?!?-, a Yeti is found in the Ice.

A rich guy melts the ice- in laughably-fake effects- and they discover just how big he is.

Well, in this Scene.  He varies in height throughout the Film.

In some silly bit of Science, they put him in a big old cage, fly up to mountain level and then thaw him out in mid-air.

Shockingly, this only gives us the tease of a disaster- it's averted.

Now they decide to show it to the World.

It's Not King Kong, so you know how this goes.

The chaos ends when the Yeti falls for the Daughter and Grandson of the Rich Guy.

To this lady's credit, I thought she was a teenager (which made me creeped out by a romance with her and Tony Kendall- who was in his 40s), but she was an Adult.

The Yeti think that she's his Wife and the kid is their kid...and I'm back to being creeped out.

The Yeti is calmed out and we get brief bits joking about the Marketing of a creature like this.  Meta...maybe?

They bring the Yeti to ANOTHER big, public event and he freaks out again.

In order to make you think that this is NOT a King Kong rip-off, this big Ape (Man) climbs DOWN a skyscraper instead of up one.  Totally different!!!!

His rampage goes on for a bit, until the woman finds him again.  

They somehow HIDE in Toronto (why not?) and it all takes a weird turn.

Off-screen, the Yeti gets sick (it's not explained) and we learn that Tony Kendal (aka the guy from Return of the Evil Dead) is scheming to blame the Yeti for the death of the Lead Scientist (which his men did) and then let him die.

The Yeti recovers- quite easily- and kills the bad guys.  This gets the Police on his case...as opposed to the TWO PREVIOUS RAMPAGES.

Will he kill Kendal?
Will he survive?

To find out, stream this silly Film.  It's pretty enjoyable.

A dumb, pretty derivative Film.  It's Dino De Laurentiis' King Kong.  It's nothing but a fairly-cheap copy.  It's why I find it funny when they parody the Marketing of that Film.  I mean...you exist because it exists.

Dicks.

The Film is full of dumb, silly moments.  It's got a good suit, but it relies on close-ups.  If you needed 827 close-ups of this guy in a furry wig (which is fabulous!), you get them.  The rear projection effects are...bad.  They do very few Kaiju shots of him smashing up cars or buildings.  

They also give you those 'big hands' shots with the Cast, which continues to look silly.  2005's King Kong managed to do this right.  I guess they learned after 40 years.

Yeti is a bit too long.  It's a bit repetitive.  It makes a weird tonal choice to make Kendal evil, especially to the degree that he's like that.  It's weird to randomly kill the dog...and then undo it.

That said, it is a pretty funny Film for all of the wrong reasons.  Just don't look at his, well, Giant of the 20th Century in this pose.

A silly and dumb Film for so many reasons.  It's a rip-off of a bad Remake.  What more could you ask for in a Bad Movie?

New Streaming: Ms. Marvel- Episode 2

 After Kamala's life changes forever, where does she go from here?

Let's find out on...

After learning that she now has powers, Kamala must learn to control them.

Hey, even Rocky had a montage (montage!).

Her and her friends, meanwhile, try to keep their lives moving like normal.

High School is hard enough when you can't help but shoot glowing purple crystals from your hands, after all.

In a nice bit for representation, you see Kamala and Nakia at a Prayer Service.  The latter also intends to run to represent the women there.

Would a Film have time for this?  Probably not.

Kamala goes to a party and meets a handsome Senior who likes what she likes and likes her.

There's nothing like a little bit of tension before the climax.

To see how it all turns out, stream the Episode now.

Another fun Episode that moves things in the right direction.  It's a simple thing to do in theory, but many Shows can't master it.

Kamala learns new things about herself and her powers.  Her friends grow with her too.  We learn more about the mystery lying beneath the surface of the Plot.  New Characters enter to create their own problems and solutions.

What the Show also continues to do is to represent and speak to groups that aren't normally-targeted in the Marketing for Shows/Films like this.  Even when I'm not part of those groups, I can still appreciate how this is done.

Ms. Marvel continues to be a fun, interesting Show that focuses on people that normally get focused on.  I really want to see where this goes, even if this guy is giving me some real Edward in Twilight vibes...

Next time, new revelations are, well, revealed.  Look- they're better with words than me sometimes, alright.  See you then...

Tubi Thursday: Something Scary (2016)

 Back when I was new to Tubi, I watched all of these Episodes.
This was later a Podcast that adapted Stories from real legends, Creepypasta and other sources.

It was...

With Hostess Sapphire Sandalo, the Episodes are a compilation of the various Shorts with limited/stylized animation.

To give you a sampler, you get Stories that allege to be real, like the horror of the Torture House in New Orleans.

Freaky stuff there.

You also get various tales that usually involve Children and strange creatures.

They range from TV scares- like Candle Cove- to a Wendigo and to even one of my favorites- Mr. Widemouth.

He just wants you to have fun...and die.

Another gem involves the widely-spread story about a Japanese Spirit that is 8 Feet Tall.

One thing the Show does is simplify and consolidate some information in the tales, usually for the better.

This one, for instance, as a last section in the original Story that is so silly that it affects the rest of the tale...so they cut it.

It's hard to talk about the Show without going too deep into some of the tales, which would ruin them.

That said, I'll give you one good Ending shot to let you know how these can be...

A fun bit of scary never hurt anyone, did it?  I don't think so.

The Stories range from outright scary to creepy to just plain weird.  They don't all end in death.  Alot of them end in 'you got lucky that X didn't do Y.'  It's certainly not tame, in case that last picture didn't dissuade you of that notion.

As a series of Shorts, it can be inconsistent in tone, other than the general 'scary' vibe.  That can be good or bad depending on your point of view.

You want 4 Ghost Stories in a row- it's bad.
You want 4 strange tales in a row- it's good.

After going through these a few years ago, I keep finding myself going back.  They did some good stuff, like getting me into Candle Cove in time for Channel Zero.  It's not complex animation.  It's not all the greatest stories.  And yes, they did get in on the Krampus craze.

If you're a fan of weird, scary and sometimes very unsettling, check these out.  They're bite-sized, so enjoy a few...or eat the whole bag in one go.

New Streaming: Obi-Wan Kenobi- Episode 4

 Ah yes, the Show that people either love OR love to hate.

I guess you can't be 'in the middle' on Star Wars these days.

Let's see who's angered/pleased with this Episode of...

Safely away from danger (for now), Obi-Wan is barely-recovered before he needs to go on a mission.

Rushing into a fight sure ended well for Luke in Empire.  Give him a hand!

Also you can check Holograms off of your Star Wars Bingo Card now.

The base he breaks into is very secure and very dangerous.

He had to swim (for the first time since Episode 1) to get in!

Can he avoid detection?

While he's looking for who he has to rescue in said Base, he comes across something very disturbing.

It's either a Sith thing or it is the comments that Racists are sending the Black Woman who plays the Villain.

Either way, yikes!

Can he escape a Base with Sith (and possibly worse!) in it?

Will he live to fight another day?
Can I pretend that he might die, even though I know he doesn't do so until A New Hope?

To find out, stream the Episode.

A good Episode that brings you to some new, crazy dangers.  I'm glad that we're off of Desert Planets, at least for a little while.  I enjoy the AC, even if it is on an Inquisitor Base.

McGregor does a good job playing a brave, but flustered Obi-Wan.  He obviously has plenty of practice in the role.  On this Show, things are quite a bit different though, of course.  He really stepped up here, which is nice.

Everyone does their part well, from the girl playing a brave young Leia to the Actress playing a sneaky and cruel Reva.  Even the half-CG voice of Darth Vader delivers.

Just remember this as well- sometimes a guy is just doing his job.  Is this guy really evil?  Probably not.  Will he get blown up by Rebels and will they then cheer about it?  You betcha.

Next time, an escape is only as good as its follow-up.  Did they really get away or will the danger follow them home?  See you then...

'00s Trash: Fungicide (2002)

 A Film is only as good as the sum of its parts.  So what do we have here?

No Money.  Bad Acting.  A dumb Story.  Even dumber F/X.
Oh boy.

This is Fungicide, a 2002 Film by the man behind Suburban Sasquatch.  Oh boy.

The Film is about giant, killer Mushrooms.  I wish I had some to make this more tolerable.  Thankfully, Rifftrax helped.

Let's just get this one over with...

A Mad Scientist is making...something in his Parent's Basement.  Said Parents are, of course, the Director's Parents.  No, really.

They worry about him (in their one Scene) and sign him up for a Relaxation Weekend in the Woods.

Joining him is a motley crew of random characters.

A Pro-Wrestler.  A Real Estate Agent.  A Soldier in a Reality Show (who appears later).

The Wrestler, by the way, is relaxing to help him deal with his problem- Spontaneous Combustion.  He's taking pills for that...

The Scientist shows up and spills his ONE BEAKER OF FORMULA by the door.

It ends up on some Mushrooms- why not?- and he doesn't tell anyone.

Why did this shot require changing the Aspect Ratio?  *shrugs*

This formula made the mushrooms grow...and also get teeth...and the desire to eat human flesh.

So what was the formula supposed to do to 'help mankind' exactly?!?

After a bit of bollocks that I'm glossing over (including the Host pointing out a caterpillar that's not on-screen), it and the other Mushrooms start killing the random people around the House.

I can mine some Poor Bastards of Cinema out of this, can't I?

If you thought that the VFX couldn't get worse than the Hand Puppet Mushroom, you'd...be sadly-wrong.

The Mushroom Army is growing and...boy, do they look bad.

I mean...why are they all different colors and patterns?!?

The 'Lead' Mushrooms are guys in drapes with a mushroom 'head' on top...so kind of phallic.  I'm not sure if that's intentional or just a 'happy accident' in this case.

He can also summon the CGI Mushrooms, which explode into CG Glass Particles when shot...or hit...or slashed...or slammed.

Also the tiny puppet ones are still around, as are even smaller stationary ones.

Confused, yet?!?

It all comes to a head with a big battle on the lawn.  It'd be funny if, you know, it didn't suck so much.

The fungi are stopped by the Wrestler letting himself blow up (really!) and then our remaining Heroes blowing up a barrel of Balsamic Vinegar (which they pronounce as Balsam-ic)...which is in the basement of the B&B.

In the aftermath, they write a totally real Book and sign copies in a totally-real Book Store...until the Scientist shows up to Sequel Bait...I guess.

The (merciful) end.

This is bad.  This is really bad.  You know that though, right?

I only watched this Film due to it being riffed by Rifftrax, which is not a good start.  I'm glad I didn't watch it on its own.  It's one of those Bad Movies that is partly-trying to be bad and stupid.

In case you don't know, if the Director is in on the joke, it's not funny.  It's usually quite painful.

The main Monsters are a guy in a drape with an umbrella covering him and a hand puppet.  That's still not the worst puppet, of course.  The CGI ones were going to be bad, but they're confusingly-bad too.

Seriously, why are they all different colors?  Why do they explode?  Why did they think that the CG glass shattering effect was the best one?  WHY?!?!?

As a 10 minute Short Film- skipping all of the Filler that gets it to just over an hour-, it could be dumb fun.  It's why people remember the Coat Hanger Scene in Birdemic, but gloss over the 40 minute Romance part.

Just make that Film or, dare I say it, try to make a good Film that you could afford.  Also don't reuse an Actor in successive shots and think that people won't notice.

Next time, I go from a dumb story to a True story.  Will this '80s Film hold up?  Stay tuned...

Immediate Response: Jurassic World- Dominion

 After hearing the best and worst things about this, I decided to see it.

Was it $12 well-spent?
Let's see...

The Good

* The Film is big and bold in scale.

* The mix of Practical Effects (people forget how many Dinosaurs are puppets) and CGI is nice here, mostly being quite seamless.

* The mix of JW and JP Actors is nice.  They play well off of each other without falling into the trap of making the original Character seem inferior to the new ones.

* The Film has several good Set Pieces throughout, which breaks up the monotony a bit in a Film like this.

The Bad

* So, I think this might have been a COVID thing (it started pre-shutdown and picked up in July), but they split up the Characters ALOT here.  You need a flow chart by the hour mark trying to keep track of who's where with who!

Seriously, they split up to search for objects/people more times than in a 12-Hour Scooby-Doo Marathon!

* That structure also makes for alot of random things being setup- like a random Allosaurus/T-Rex rivalry or the new big bad Dinosaur- for a much later payoff.  It, again, makes things hard to follow sometimes.

* Speaking of that big bad Dinosaur, the Film feels like they wanted to use every last one in this one (since it is the Finale- so they say).  As such, they appear, get one Scene and vanish.

* Like the Dinosaurs, many Characters either just stop appearing after 2 Scenes- like Justice Smith- or vanish for large chunks of the Runtime- like Jeff Goldblum.  Was that a COVID thing too or are there just too many Characters?

* There's alot of Editing cheats here.  For instance, a Dinosaur is stunned for what seems like 20-30 seconds...which was somehow enough time for 4 people to climb a ladder?!?

* Our last hope having the 'Owen is the kid traumatized with the raptor claw in the first Film by Alan' has been dashed!

* For all of the big 'Dinosaurs mixed into our World' hype, it happens a few times in the Intro Scenes...before they eventually end up at a Facility where their appearance seems natural.

* As always, the giant Dinosaurs are masters of stealth.  Sneaky, multi-story tall, multi-ton creatures.

The Film is big, loud and kind of dumb.  It does manage to work in what you'd hope to see in one of these- just with even less subtlety- though.

If you like the newer Films more than the originals, this one will satisfy.  If you don't, it's...alot of sound and fury signifying nothing.  Good-looking sound and fury though.

New Streaming: Ms. Marvel- Episode 1

 After team-up Shows, Movie spin-offs and weird ventures like Moon Knight, let's get into some Legacy Heroes.

See how a young girl with a dream becomes...

Kamala Khan is a young girl living in Jersey City.

She's a Dreamer (but she's not the only one) and people want her to become what they want her to be.

However, she wants to be Captain Marvel, or at least the next big thing.

According to the Show, Ant-Man started a Podcast and went over the events of Endgame, which explains how everyone knows the key details.

And yes, like most people that heard the idea, I too want to wish it into existence.

She really wants to go to the first AvengersCon, which is exactly what it sounds like.

Unfortunately, she can't drive and she tends to say things that make her Parents less than amenable to requests.

Can she find a way to go?

With a whole lot of wishing, she gets her Captain Marvel costume ready and plans for her big night out.

Of course, the real issues begin when she gets there.

She's going to get her shot at becoming a Superhero, but it's not going to be easy.

To find out what happens, stream the Show.

A fun Show that speaks to a Generation that I'm not really a part of.  Even still, I can enjoy the energy.

As much as Marketing tries to define Generations by letters, there are definitely some truths there.  In this case, there's an energy here which is all about trying to be something that you want to be.  Teenagers rebelling is certainly not a unique Gen Z idea though, of course.

Much like the Tom Holland Films, there's a unique feel here through visual cues (like having Text Messages appear as background signs, etc) and the use of color.  There's also some cultural stuff here with Kamala and her family which probably speaks to other people more.  The family dynamic is a nice one here regardless.

On its own, Ms. Marvel is a fun start to an Origin Story.  All of things that make it seem fun and fresh to others, might turn some off.  That's fine.  At least I know where to get a spare Amazing Bulk Costume now...

Next time, Kamala has to make the most of her new situation.  Has she drawn too much attention though?  See you then...

Tubi Thursday: Judgement Day (1998)

In 1998, Meteors/Asteroids were all the rage.

We had Deep Impact.
We had Armageddon.
We also had...

In this Film, the Government discovers that an Asteroid is coming towards the Earth.

Do they tell anyone?
Nah.

Let's just get 'Johnny Cage' (Linden Ashby) to use his device (which only he can work?).

The problem- a radical Preacher (Van Peebles) kidnaps him to stop him from using it.

Him and his Cult (which includes 'Tiny' Lister) think that Humanity is needed to be purged.

Too bad 'Johnny' couldn't just leave notes!

An FBI Agent (Suzy Amis) is sent to find him, but the only source they have is a Prisoner (Ice-T).

This means doing something nice and low-budget- driving around Los Angeles.
They get in a few shoot-outs and eventually track down Peebles.

And no, this is a different Film with the same Title.  Looks neat though, right?

Can they get to 'Cage' in time?
Can they do anything other than meet a random person, get info and then get them killed in their next appearance (or, in one case, the same appearance)?

I mean, you know they will right.  This is also a different Movie, but f#%k getting Screencaps today.

The End.

It's...pretty nothing.  It's not badly-made.  It's not badly-written.  It's just...kind of there.

Armageddon (which, as a reminder, is somehow part of the Criterion Collection!) had the big Budget, silly Plot and Story behind it.
Deep Impact had the big Budget, grand scale and, well, Morgan Freeman.

Judgement Day has a pretty small Budget (the CGI is very '90s and there are like 3 main Sets), a pretty small Story in scale (broken up by random crashes) and Ice-T trying to expand his emotional range.

Like I said, it's not bad.  It just doesn't try too hard.  They even got Coolio, but only for one Scene.

Even just describing the Plot is a bit silly, to be fair.  An Agent must get a Criminal to help her find a Scientist who's been kidnapped by a Cult in order to stop an Asteroid crashing into the Earth.  It's a bit muddled, no?

I did like Amis here, to be fair.  She must have thought she peaked, since she married James Cameron and retired from Acting after this Film.  'I can't do better than this.  Now let's find the Titanic!'

On the plus side, it comes to us from John Terlesky, most known as the Star of Deathstalker 2.  Why not?

When you don't aim high, you don't make something too exciting.  Reach for the Stars, Kids- just avoid the Asteroids!