'00s Trash?: Blood and Chocolate (2007)

 A Film that sounds both gross and delicious.  Naturally, this Film is about...Werewolves?
Sure.  Alright then.

The Plot involves a secret cabal of Lycanthropes, a would-be Author and, well, another Romeo & Juliet Story.  As great as that Story is, how many Films would have to come up with their own Plots if it didn't exist?  Think about it.

Will this pre-Twilight Story be better than what would come later?  Would it help to be done by a German Director most well-known for a Film about Women's Suffrage?  

To find out, read on...

A young girl lives happily in the Woods with her family until some people kill them all and burn the place down.

Still upset that you didn't get that one toy you wanted when you were 10 years old?

Years later, she lives in Romania (in a rare turn, this Film shot in Bucharest is SET in Bucharest) with a new Clan...not that we're told that yet.

Of course, if the Film is marketed around this, why bother waiting to tell the Audience?

After sneaking into a Church, she runs afoul of a young man with a book full of Werewolf Sketches.

As (improbable) luck would have it, he's researching Lycanthropes for a Book (which I guess he's drawing too) and just happens to show up in the same Town as her and the Clan.

She hangs around with the guy and talks about Werewolves in the 'theoretical' sense, but her Leader- Olivier Martinez- discourages it.

This creates friction with his Son as well, who is trying to either mate with her or get her killed.
A tough choice any day, no?

We eventually get to see them in action as they let loose a criminal (who betrayed them) in the Woods and hunt them down.  If he makes it to the River, he lives.
He doesn't.

They jump through the air, glow random color shades and turn into normal Wolves.

Hmm...am I just SPOILED by stuff like An American Werewolf in London and its ilk?

They, of course, fall in love after some time.

This sure won't sit well with the guy who wants to be her mate (or, again, killer).

He with the Lex Luther in BvS haircut finally attacks the guy, but is wounded by his silver necklace lightly grazing his wolf form.

So, naturally, the guy straight up spears the Werewolf through a balcony!

The Werewolves eventually catch him and give him the same treatment as the last guy in the Woods.

He makes an escape- using some so-so tricks- and...is still attacked when he crosses the River.

Alright, so now him and the girl can just leave, right?  Movie over.  Plot has gone full circle and we've reached a climax?

Nope!

He has to find a cure for her silver poisoning- which is super easy, barely an inconvenience- and the Film *actually* ends with- wait for it- a shoot-out between him and the Werewolves.

The pair escape this time- for real.

An alright Film which has great atmosphere...but not much else.

The Film isn't terrible.  It's just...not that engaging.  
The Romeo & Juliet thing is played out, even 15 years ago.  The Acting is nothing memorable.  The Locations are nice, but not engaging.  It's just people going to old Buildings in Bucharest and talking about Werewolves.  Does that sound amazing?

The eventual pay-off to them as Werewolves was also a bit underwhelming for me.  Kudos for the different choice and all...but it wasn't a very exciting one.  When I'm more engaged in a long texting discussion than your Werewolf Film, it's a disappointment.

Let's end on a high note.  What's the face you make when you've just killed your Girlfriend's Family and ruined her life?

Next up, I cover the final piece (I can find) in a Series that started and stopped for 30 years.  See what happens when Studios waste lots of money on a Film.  Stay tuned...