'70s Trash?: Captain America (1979)

 The cinematic equivalent of getting plain white socks for Christmas.  This is Captain America, specifically the TV Movie Version.  It is not the first version- that's a Film Serial- and it obviously wasn't the last version.  It is notable for happening during a time when Marvel was doing lots of this stuff.  We got Spider-Man (in America and Japan), The Incredible Hulk and even Doctor Strange.  There was more planned that never came about- including a Live-Action Human Torch TV Show!- and alot of seemed to amount to nothing.  Strange was a failed Pilot and this didn't exactly fare much better.  This one at least got a second Movie/attempt out of it.  Starring future B-Movie Icon Reb Brown, this Movie tells *an* origin of Captain America.  It doesn't tell *the* origin, of course, since they couldn't leave well enough alone and probably doing a Period Piece was a no-go with the Network.  As such, things change alot- most for the worse.  I don't want to be all negative on this one.  After all, if I stick with the 'white socks for Christmas' metaphor, they are useful for you.  To find out how this dated oddity turned out, read on...

Instead of the '40s, it is the '70s.

Steve Rogers is back home from the War (having been a Marine) and is just kind of super-chill.
Seriously, he just wants to drive around the country in his Van.

That's what Haley on American Dad did, not Stan!

His chill attitude is not reciprocated, however, as bad guys want to kill him for his connection to a Scientist.

The only logical method: oil up an *entire stretch of road* and hope that the crash kills him.

He's...basically unharmed by the whole thing and sees his Dad's Friend.

The guy exposition dumps all over him about his Father making a 'super steroid' called FLAG (I'll spare you the spell-out) and it being coded to his DNA.

As such, it will work best with Steve.
Oh and his Dad also used to be Captain America apparently.

The aforementioned friend is found dying in his place and only mentions a few names.  This will, of course, pay off later.

Watch Reb Brown try to emote- it's adorable.

The bad guys keep trying to kill Steve, doing a much better job on the third attempt.

However, Dad's Friend decides that he should inject Steve with FLAG, since, you know, he's going to die if they don't.

Logical.

Steve recovers and gets a whole lot of new stuff as a 'thank you gift' for unwillingly-taking the drug, including a fixed-up Van, a new bike and...the lamest version of Captain America's shield ever.

Seriously, I've seen toy ones that look better!

The Film has two things that it really, really loves...

1) Helicopter Shots (both of them AND by them- sometimes both!)

2) Motorcycle Racing shots.

This version of Cap is more Evel Knievel than the Sentinel of Liberty.

To skip past much filler, the bad guy steals the codes from the dead Scientist's Daughter and arms a NEUTRON BOMB to rob a Gold Depository.  No, really.

Cap stops them...by poisoning the man with exhaust fumes from the truck...but he's got a dead man's switch for the bomb.  Why have this if you didn't expect any interference?

This leads to a thrilling climax of...Cap watching the guy get oxygen in the back of a truck.  Eat it, NYC Battle from The Avengers!

For the final Scene, Cap says that he wants to look like his Father as the new Captain America...and he does.

Honestly, if you swap out the shield for a better one and ditch the helmet, it is an improvement.  The End.

A slow-moving Film that is definitely a TV Movie- for better or for worse.  It is all build-up, really.  It is all just 'let's move things into place for the Captain America TV Show.'  That's good...if it exists.  It does not.  As such, it means that the Film builds very slowly to something that never will quite be paid off.  Yes, I will do the Sequel and that buffers that a bit.  The new origin is eh, not great.  I get that they wanted to/needed to make it modern (for 1979), but there are better ways.  Why not do the 'man out of time' story?  It has worked so many times since then, both in Comics and in basically every other Version done in Live Action (excluding the Serial, for obvious reasons).  There's a real half-hearted attempt to say that both things happened, of course.  Of course, unless we see the Dad in any meaningful way, it means basically nothing.  For all they can prove, his Dad was a Vampire who was 20 foot tall and shot lasers from his eyes!  It also doesn't help that Cap is written in a pretty apathetic way.  He *eventually* wants to do the right thing, but only after he just kind of 'chills' and does his own thing.  His original explanation works for that bit, but falls apart as the Film wears on.  He gets there, but, like the Movie, takes too long.  The Action Scenes that *aren't* Motorcycle Chases or Helicopter Chases are alright, but very short.  This is all just a tease.  Reb Brown never gets to his full crazy self here, playing a very 'chill' and sedate Cap.  If that was done later, he could *nail* the version of Cap that was the crazy, Clint Walker one!  As it is, the whole thing is pretty underwhelming, but serviceable.  You'll have more fun with your PS5, but you do need those socks.  Speaking of needs, I must mention that Buster Jones- famous for voicing many iconic Characters like Black Vulcan and GI Joe's Doc- is here in one of his few live-action roles.

Next up, I'll begin the new Year by covering the Sequel.  I don't even need to change Discs, so bonus!  Stay tuned...