Quick Review: Child's Play (2019)

 With so many Remakes out there these days, I might as well cover one.  In this case, it's one for a Series that I've never really *loved.*  Will I be on board?

In this Reboot, we see the new Buddi Doll. 

This one is modern and syncs up to your 'Smart' Devices.

A young Mother (Aubrey Plaza) gets a defective version of the doll that was programmed without safety features by a disgruntled Employee in Asia.

It befriends her partially-deaf son and all seems well.

The programming that would keep Buddi- who decides to name himself Chucky for no clear reason- from going all Single White Female aren't there, so he gets a bit...possessive.

When Chucky starts killing people, our Hero gets rid of him.

Hey look- a Chucky Film that realizes that he's just a doll and you can smash him!

Of course, he won't stay down...

Will Chucky 2.0 get his revenge?  Will he unleash more than just his own terror on the people around him?  Will he make Uuber seem even less safe?

To find out, stream the Film on Amazon Prime (or somewhere else).

It has to get points for creativity, at least.  Many Remakes are just 'here's the same Film, but with new effects and younger Actors.'  That works...for Studios but about nobody else.  In this case, the Film takes the core premise- Chucky is an evil doll who terrorizes a family- and chucks everything else.  No Voodoo.  No Brad Dourif.  It is the kind of change that is guaranteed to offend some and please others.  I do feel the need to diagram the argument for hardcore fans being against this.  If it was a blatant Remake like mentioned before, would they have been happy?  No.  They would have said that it was, well, a blatant cash grab remake.  So why is there such outrage against this one, when it changes so much to become a fresh update?  Oh right- it's different, so it must be evil.  I'm just saying that the logic doesn't hold much weight to me.  As far as this Film goes, it worked pretty well for me.  It isn't great per se, but it does work.  The Acting is fine, especially Plaza playing to her strengths here.  The new Chucky looks good when it needs to and the Film makes sure to lean into how much the face goes into the 'uncanny valley.'  I like Hamill here as the Doll too- it just worked.  If you liked the original Films and didn't see this, give it a chance.  I mean, it won't kill you to try something a little different, no?

A pretty by-the-numbers Films that at least tries to be new.  It also leans into the new gimmicks, so they were trying here.

Streaming Standard: Dragon's Dogma (2020)

 Anime is still more of Bob's thing, but Netflix 'produced' Anime falls more into more territory.

This is also an Anime based on a Video Game that both of us have played.

So what is Dragon's Dogma, aside from a fun alliteration?
Let's find out...

It is a nice, normal day in your typical Fantasy World.

The only problem- a rampaging Dragon is on the loose, killing everyone!

Our Hero is a Hunter with a pregnant wife and an adopted (kind of) Son.

It's kind of like in Sitcoms when the Neighbor Boy just kind of hangs out in every Episode and sleeps over when he likes.

Well, that doesn't matter, they're all dead!

The Husband is given rebirth by the Dragon, making him an Arisen.

The Dragon does this seemingly out of pure amusement at him trying to kill it.

He's joined by a Pawn, a magical being who exists solely to serve Arisen.

He now has to track down the Dragon at its Cave on the other side of the land.

Along the way, he'll go on a series of adventures that represent the Seven Deadly Sins.
It's not subtle sometimes.

Can they get past the many monsters and get revenge?  Will they save the kingdom or go down trying?

To find out, stream the Show on Netflix.

A well-made, but damn bleak Show.  Having played the Games, they certainly aren't comedic.  Even so, it will make Snyder Cut defenders go 'damn- that's dark and depressing!'  I won't SPOIL the Show, but they don't deviate from the Game(s) that much.  Feel free to SPOIL it for yourself if you want to.  Not getting into that, the Show has an Art Style that I mostly like.  The fully-CGI Animation can be a bit intense sometimes, but its otherwise quite good.  The Monsters- one unique one per Episode, mostly- are done just differently enough to stand out each time.  It is something about the rendering- you can see for yourself above.  Each one seems to relate to the Theme of the Episode too, so it is not random either.  If you're into the kind of violent, bleak Anime that this is offering, its a winner.  If you're into more light-hearted fare, then it is 100% a 'no' for you on this.  If you're still not sure, the freaky Opening Credits should give things away...

There's nothing wrong with how the Show is made- it's just bleak, bloody and unsettling at times.

How 'Batman' & 'Superman' *Failed* to Set-Up The Justice League Cartoon

 With all of this attention on Justice League with *ugh* the Snyder Cut, I thought we should look back at how another Justice League was formed.

The short version now: Batman got a Cartoon, which led into a Superman Cartoon.  That one introduced elements and characters that would become a part of the center piece of the DCAU that was so good- the Justice League Cartoon.

The real version, however, is not that simple or exact.

In Season 2, we got the Episode 'Speed Demons.'

In it, Flash appears as part of a Charity Race, but it's all a scheme against both by the Weather Wizard, in his first Animated appearance.  This would, of course, follow the Justice League TV Pilot.

The next attempt at major world-building was done with a Season 3 Episode 'A Fish Story.'

Aquaman shows up and has a battle of sorts with Lex Luthor over his bombing of the Ocean floor near Metropolis.

A bit of a weird connection: the late Miguel Ferrer would voice 'Weather Wizard' and 'Aquaman' in this pair of Episodes!

The next one would come in the Episode 'In Brightest Day...'

A new Green Lantern- called Kyle Rayner, but clearly a mix of Rayner and Hal Jordan.

He's introduced, teams up with Superman and fights Sinestro.  All good stuff.

This would all come at the very end run of the Series- just 4 Episodes before the end of it, to be exact.

As such, that's all we get.

Fast-forward to Justice League and we get Batman & Superman flanked by the following members...

Martian Manhunter

Wonder Woman

Hawkgirl

The Flash

Green Lantern (John Stewart)

So, um, what happened to Aquaman and Kyle Rayner?

Well, Rayner wouldn't show up until an Episode of Justice League Unlimited (aka Season 3) with a throwaway line about 'being stuck on Oa in training.'  That's it!

As for Aquaman, he'd appear in Guest Spots, but never really joined the Team.

Meanwhile, Wonder Woman, Manhunter and Hawkgirl just appear in the Pilot and go from there.
Yes, the same thing that we got with Cyborg, Flash and Aquaman in the Film.

As the World braces for the 4-Hour Cut of a Film rejected by the Studio, let's just remember that even the great Shows didn't *quite* set things up right either.

*Holiday* Pilot Wings: Poltergeist- The Legacy

 You've got to love a Show like this when the Title has a double meaning...and no meaning. 

 This is Poltergeist: The Legacy, specifically its Pilot.  The Title makes you think something obvious- a follow-up.  

With the real Franchise Star sadly dead way too early, this must be about her Family.  Wait- didn't her Family dump her on someone else in the 3rd Film?  Isn't her Sister off in College (Movie code for also dead IRL)?  Which Family is the Star of this Show?  

None of them!  

Instead, this is the tale of a group of paranormal experts dealing with threats around the World.  The name of the group- the Legacy.  

Great- more people who get into Paranormal Investigative College on the backs of their rich Parents!  

No, the name is because it is apparently a family thing to be part of the group.  That literally only affects/relates to the Lead, but alright.  

The Plot here involves some mystical artifacts that, conveniently, relate to his Father's death.  Can he get The Legacy together to save the World?  Let's see.

In the Opening, a Father and Son try to find an evil box.  The former does, but is tempted into opening it, releasing a CGI Skeleton that kills him.

Now his barely-a-teen Son is in The Legacy?  We're boned.

Quick technical note: I have the Pilot on VHS (as mentioned) and Season 1 on DVD.  The Screen Caps are from the latter.

All grown up, he's in charge of one House for The Legacy and has all but one of the magic boxes in storage.

I'm not sure if keeping them all in one place is a good idea though...

Over in Ireland, a Widower and her Daughter go to an Antique Shop.  The latter feels 'drawn' to a box, which the Shopkeep happily sells her.

The problem- it won't open...yet.

It does open and possess him with the spirit from the box.  It needs to possess the girl, however, as her innocence will empower it.

The Legacy goes to Ireland to find the box, but it is too late.  And yes, I'm counting half of this Pilot taking place in Ireland as an excuse to make it a Holiday post.

The Shopkeep (William Sadler and his dodgy Irish Accent) uses his powers to kill one of the team (said image is on the VHS Box Art) and sleep with the Mother.

After he's bested, the spirit is still loose.

It follows them back to the Castle and uses their fears to take their keys to the boxes, so that they can all be opened.

Just like Justice League's Mother Boxes, that is a bad thing.  Also like that Movie, the Team kind of sucks and easily loses all of their keys.

On the plus side, their teammate gets to make one last appearance as a spirit.

It all leads to a big, kind of silly finale in which an evil Child is born and the boxes are open.

Our sword-swinging Hero manages to save the day with the girl's help, setting us up for 4 Seasons (3 on Showtime and one on Sci-Fi).  The End.

A pretty good Pilot, but it definitely has some issues.  For starters, the MacGuffin isn't that creative.  Boxes that contain evil spirits- meh.  

The connection to the supposed source material is really lax too.  The Films were always about spirits 'trying to get to the other side.'  I guess that *sort of* connects here...maybe.  The Marketing reason for this is obvious, even if there had been some time between the last Film and this Show (8 years to be exact).  

Mind you, other attempts to turn Horror Films into TV Shows have also tried this- see Friday the 13th: The Series.  

We also got that weird Omen Pilot where Damian was a floating ball of green light.  Wait- William Sadler was in that too!!!  

Later on, we'd get more direct adaptations for stuff like The Omen and The Exorcist.  

The closest thing we get here is Zelda Rubinstein appearing as a different Character in Episode 20.  

On its own, the Pacing is pretty good and the setup/payoff is worth it.  There are some dated-looking effects like the flying skeletons, but nothing truly terrible.  At worst, the facial morphing (big in the '90s) is silly.  

The overall package is good and I can see myself going back to this, especially for a Season 4 Episode I need to cover in the future.  

It's not great, but it shows potential.  Hopefully the rest of the Series delivered more than, well, this morphing effect...

It has some strong moments, but definitely feels like a Pilot that is laying things out.  I have the whole of Season 1, so maybe I'll explore a bit more.

Streaming Standard: Frankenstein's Monster's Monster, Frankenstein

 Oh boy, this is an odd one.

What you have here is a Short Form Mockumentary that is a bit of Forgotten Silver (ironically, it too is forgotten by most) with a bit of Spinal Tap and I'm Still Here.

It is also a Parody (in general) of Broadway Plays and some Actors' quirks.

It also has a great, dumb Title.  This is...

David Harbour appears as himself, but also as his own Father.

In this case, his 'Father' was a super-serious Actor who was mysterious to David and he seeks to know more about him.

To do so, he recreates his Office and looks at the titular Play he ran on TV (apparently live) in the '70s.

Said Play is shown in small segment and is just plain bizarre!

Basically, Dr. Frankenstein has his Assistant pretend to be him and he pretends to be the Monster.
The reason: he needs to convince the Spokesperson for a University to grant him more money for his work.

It's kind of stupidly-brilliant.

The truth about David Harbour's Dad will come out and it won't be pretty.

P is for Parody.

What will happen in the Play?  How will Harbour process all of this?

To find out, stream the Special.

A weird, sort of random thing.  To some people, this is just too weird and bizarre.  To some people, it is the perfect blend of insanity and seriousness.  The premise is a good one.  The premise is, yes, a weird one.  Harbour plays it straight and it really works.  He seems sincere when he needs to.  He seems crazy when he needs to.  You have to understand and accept certain things for this to work.  The Play is intentionally bad.  The Play is pretentious and the Actors are over-the-top.  If you don't get that/like that, you'll wonder why they are so bad/silly/ridiculous.  Bad Acting on purpose is a bit like Bad Singing on purpose- you either like it or hate it.  Outside of that stuff, the main Plot is serious, but with plenty of odd moments.  Hey look- it is Mrs. Bland!  The whole thing is just plain weird.  Me- I like it quite a bit.  If you don't, well, that's fine too.  Either way, we're still waiting for our shots, so why not enjoy it with the people you're stuck with at home anyways?

A trippy, faux self-serious Special.  You'll either love it or hate it.

Quick Review: Bill & Ted Face the Music (2020)

 It's nice to see a Series come back as neither an embarrassment, nor as an Advertisement for Batteries.  Let's jump right into...

In the present, Bill & Ted are...not famous Rock Stars that united the World.

They are still seeking out the one Song that will do just that.

Time is beginning to mess up due to this not happening, so the pair must finally do it.

Can they finally figure out what they were missing?

The Plot splits here as Bill & Ted try to steal the song...from themselves and keep finding worse future versions.

Meanwhile, their Daughters (the Film ignores that they both had baby boys at the end of Bogus Journey) go time-traveling to assemble the greatest band ever to play the Song.

Can they finally do it after 25 years of trying without success?

Can they get Death's help?

Will we finally get the Station spin-off we richly deserve?

No SPOILERS.

A fun revival...eventually.  The early parts of the Film strike an odd tone, to say the least.  Bill & Ted didn't make it big, their marriages are on the rocks and their kids aren't what people hope them to be.  Fun?  It's obviously part of a bigger Story of redemption for all of them.  I get that- sure.  It just makes for a slightly-different, more morose Story at first.  The journey is worth it in the end, but I just had to note the odd tone early on.  Like the previous Films, they have some real fun with Time Travel.  Bill & Ted's journey is more personal, while their Daughters go on a similar trek to wat their Dads did in the first Film.  I like that they give us a good mix of Characters for their super-group and they aren't all obvious picks.  The tricky thing with a story like this is how you balance the Nostalgia and the new Characters.  Do you make them too incompetent to keep the familiar Characters strong?  Do you make them take over the tale and risk edging out the older fans?  It's not easy...but I think they make it work.  Bill & Ted prove to be better people, even if they are still kind of dumb.  The Daughters find a use for their specialized skills and prove that they can be their own Stars.  No matter how you feel about alot of thing, Bill & Ted Face the Music is fun and it sure lets you rock out together...

A fun Film that exposits a bit too much about a Film that we don't get to see.  Once you get past that, it is vivid, fun and enjoyable.

Compare/Contrast: Stacey (1973) vs. Malibu Express (1985)

 Life is weird.

So the first Film I watched by Andy Sidaris (Malibu Express) turns out to be a Remake of Stacey, the last Film by Andy Sidaris I watched (and will watch, since I've seen them all now!).

Make sense?

Let's see how they are different and alike...

VS

The first big change is that Express has a Male Lead.  Said Lead would later be weirdly-retconned as an Actor in a Film, making Express a Film-within-a-Film.

As a bonus, Seven would also have its Poster shown in a Film, despite a Character from THAT Film being brought back in Picasso Trigger.

Anyhow, Sybil Danning hires him for the job, as opposed to the Grandmother.  She looks better in the dress than Grandma would!

Express also has a Subplot involving a Redneck Family (in California) that keeps challenging our Lead to Races.

Yeah, I don't miss that in Stacey.

A big change, as noted, is that Stacey is not in Express.

In her place, in nearly the same Scene is a Racecar Driver who's last name is 'Khnockers.'

Weird to see the '70s Version being arguably more progressive.

Also missing in full detail is the extent of the blackmail angle with the Husband.

In Stacey, it is just that he was Gay in secret and went to Clubs (like Ed Koch or Roy Cohn).
In Express, he dresses in drag (which doesn't inherently make you gay, of course).

Either way, our Heroine/Hero is still a mean shot...eventually.

In Stacey, we learn that the Daughter in with 'the wrong crowd' killed the blackmailing Chauffeur.

In Express, we learn that...until we learn that it was a lie.
In a twist, it was Danning all along, who confesses to it (once she's out of the Country) via cassette tape to our Hero.

Of course, the Tape explodes like in Mission: Impossible to boot.

So how do they match up?

Stacey is alright, but kind of boring.  The extra bits of silly and flourish that we get in Express certain liven things up.  Adding Sybil Danning is always a plus too.

The extra Comedy Bits aren't always winners though, so as far as quality is concerned, there's an edge to Stacey.

It's like picking the best of the about-to-expire Meat though.

I hope this makes it clear that I didn't just randomly picking Body Snatchers and then an Andy Sidaris Film.  There's sometimes a rhyme to my reason.

I'm only a little bit crazy.

Andy Sidaris Films are never great, but they can be real fun.  Go with the more fun version, thanks to and in spite of its flaws.

The Original Triple B Flick: Stacey (1973)

 Andy Sidaris will finally be out of my life!  

Back in 2017, I decided to do all of the Triple B Films by the late Director.  The reason- my Dad bought the DVD Set.  Not every story has a complicated reasoning- sometimes it is that simple.  

After Return to Savage Beach, I thought I was done.
Oops, there is Seven, a Film I covered as part of an April Fools Day Post.  Now I was done, right?  Wrong!

The *actual* first Film by Sidaris was Stacey, the origin of this whole trashy Series.  The Plot involves the titular Character- who is a Detective and Race Car Driver- solving a family case of blackmail and murder.  Let's see if you can match up, Knives Out!  

If this Plot sounds familiar, I'll get to that in a bit.  As Sidaris' first Film, will we see the stuff that would become his trademarks?  To find out, read on...

Stacey is hired by a rich old lady to spy on her family.  The reason: to find out who should be the proper heir.

Seems super shady- I'd get paid in cash...and not just because Debit Cards didn't exist yet either.
And yes, I did Google that.

Everyone is either a creep, an asshole or hiding something.

Can we just give the money to the cat instead?

The one Daughter is involved with some fishy stuff.  When you go to investigate, it is important to wear your best bikini top.

Hercule Poirot did the same thing.
I did not Google that.

The Chauffeur is blackmailing, well, everyone.

One Son is hiding that he's Gay, while his Wife is hiding the fact that she's banging a different guy.
I wonder what drove them apart?

After a Party, said Chauffeur is killed.

Was it one of his victims?
Was it the guy who said that he'd kill him if he didn't pay back the loan?
Funny third thing?

Stacey and her boyfriend investigate, checking out the guy's place.  Naturally, they make sure to have sex in his bed while they are there, since, you know, evidence.

They find some pictures and need them developed, so naturally...

They go to the big California Raceway to do just that, since Stacey knows a guy.  

Sorry CVS, you don't get to develop the blackmail photos!
Also you likely didn't exist in Southern California back then.

Also also, I wonder if Sidaris paid any of these people for their likeness rights to be in this Film.

Stacey has a big shoot-out with the goons in and around the Raceway.

I love to see the people ignore a man running by with a shotgun in the Parking Lot.
What is this, Texas?!?

In the end, we learn that the one Daughter was the killer, since he was blackmailing her.

Were you expecting a big twist?  Nope.  
The End.

This was...pretty forgettable.  I'm not super-shocked to see this one be forgotten.  It doesn't have the big hooks that you get with Sidaris' later Films.  You don't get the big explosions.  You don't get the silly Action Scenes.  This is the how it all started and the roots are there...but that's it.  

In a way, it is like reading the first Draft of a Book.  Granted- the final Book will not read a Pulitzer. 

Even so, it is a fun Book that you can read for an afternoon.  In this Film, the basic Plot is okay.  If you're expecting any surprises, there are none.  If you're expecting a big Action Scene, there is one...sort of.  It's basically just run-stop-shoot-run for about 10 minutes.  It's not awful, but it's not, you know, engaging. 

 

Later Sidaris Films have bad Action Scenes, but they also have silly ones that make you laugh.  For instance, the man who throws a real frisbee to the bad guys (while disguised) and then switches it with a BLADED frisbee that he just happens to be carrying.  Thank Heavens for planning ahead, eh. 

 

Just like Seven, the basic Film is there, but nothing else.  Since my copy is a VHS Rip (oddly, Seven got a BLU-RAY Release!), it also includes a quick ad for a Porn Film that blurs out the Nudity by...tinting the whole Film pink.  No, really.

Next time, I finally rewatch another Film from my childhood.  Will it be good for me now?  Stay tuned...