Holiday Flix: My Bloody Valentine (1981)

 It's a-boot to get bloody in here!

The 2000s were a great Decade if you loved Remakes of Horror Films from the '80s (or sometimes further back).  My Bloody Valentine 3-D was one of those.

It was also a Remake with one of the two guys from Supernatural (the other being House of Wax).

Let's not talk about that Film though- it is time for the Original!

This Canadian Film was one of the early Slasher Films when the Genre really took off.  To really date this Film, it was supposedly censored in the wake of John Lennon's death in December of 1980.

Yikes.

Is this Cult Classic worth a look over 40 years later or should you stick to the Remake?
To find out, read on...

The Film begins with two people in Mining Gear wandering off on their own.

One of them strips down, but briefly keeps the mask on.

Whose Fetish is this?

Anyhow, he kills her and then we get the Titles.

The Film follows a group of Miners who live and party in nearby Valentine's Bluff.

The titular day is nearly there.

The Mayor and Sheriff reminisce about how this is the first Valentine's Day Party in 20 years.

We hear about a Miner named Harry who was nearly killed in an explosion due to Owner incompetence.
The Holiday Party happened at the same time.

He proceeds to kill said Owner and threatened them to never hold a Party again!

He's back now, but his whereabouts cannot be proven.

I'd joke about how poorly managed the Psych Wards were in '80s Slashers (see Sleepaway Camp 2, The Burning and Girls Nite Out), but Reagan literally did clear them out!

The Miner kills one of the older ladies preparing for the Party.

The other Plot involves a guy- TJ- who left Town and his girlfriend behind to 'make it big.'

He's now returned and wants his girlfriend back, but Axel is now with her.

It is a real 'Will They, Who Cares?' tale.

Random folks of minor importance die in the Town as the Party goes on unofficially

Harry will not be pleased!

Even in 1981, the 'Guy who misses the dead body' cliche was in full effect.

The Miner continues to kill people, mostly the young folks who decide to go to the Mine to Party.

Even if they don't die, are they really going to have a good time drinking and making out in a Coal Mine?!?

Oh, and this Scene is still missing on the most recent Uncut version of this Film made the year my Brother was born.
We only get to see them found like this.

As it turns out, the Miner was actually dead.  He died 5 years ago.

So, who is this Miner?

It is Axel!
Why?

As a kid, he watched the original Miner- Harry- kill his Dad.

This made him crazy...somehow.

When TJ returned, he went a bit nuts.

He escapes (minus an arm) to set up a Sequel that never got made.

A pretty basic Film, but it really doesn't do anything wrong either.

MBV is a pretty simple Film.  It sets up a concept.  It introduces a bunch of random Characters.  It sets up a killer.  They then start the killing.

The Plot is not that complicated, just riding on the TJ-Sarah-Axel Love Triangle and not much else.

The draw here are the kills.
They are done well.
They are bloody.

I'm watching the most recent- as far as I know- Cut and you can see most of it in all of its gory...I mean, glory.

The Film is fine.  It is nothing amazing.
I was hoping for something far more Canadian from this, but it is just the beer and a-boots, really.

I can at least reminisce about this older version of the classic Paramount logo though.

A Film that is probably a must-see for Slasher buffs.  That said, there's no major hook here to really stand out.

Tubi Thursday: Blue Beetle (2023)

 Since I- like many people- gave up on the DCEU when the Reboot was announced, I missed this one.

Now I've seen it.

How much am I kicking myself over this?

Jaime Reyes returns home from College and finds that things aren't great.

His Family is in financial trouble.
The neighborhood is disappearing.

Oh, and his Family can't help but tease him...

Fate intercedes and he ends up in the possession of the Scarab.

It chooses him- much like a Green Lantern ring- and things change in a hurry!

He now has great powers- think an Iron Man suit mixed with Venom and a bit of Green Lantern- and little control.

He needs to bond with the scarab...and stay away from Mrs. Kord!

Can he gain control of the suit?
Can he rise to the occasion?

Where did he learn to swordfight?!?

Oh and...

What the hell is this thing?!?

To find out, stream the Film now.

A fun Film that has what these kinds of things really need- heart.

The Story is a hodge podge of ideas (as this is the third iteration of the Blue Beetle character over several Decades).

It looks nice, with a vibrant color palette and lots of neon.

It is charming, with a family dynamic on par with Ms. Marvel/The Marvels.

It has a great Lead, a brave young man who grows up in pretty much real time for the Story.

The Film has lots going on, but mercifully is pretty much separate from the DCEU.  I don't know if that's accidental or by design.

Save for references to Batman, Superman and a Lexcorp sign, you can go into this without seeing the other Films.

Would I have liked a Cameo?  Probably.

That said, the Film is a neat journey with lots of heart and energy.  Maybe we'll see more of it in Gunn's version of the DCEU and finally get the team-up that we desperately need...

A fun, flashy Film that can also hit you in the feels.  If you skipped it for any number of reasons, give it a look.

My Crazy Youth: When The Falcon and The Red Hulk Debuted on 'The Avengers' Together

There's lots of talk about the MCU these days.
There's a new Captain America Film coming out.

The promotion of the Film- which fully elevates Sam Wilson from The Falcon to Captain America- is also built around a big name.

The Red Hulk!

This is all quite natural, you see, as both of them debuted on The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes at the same time!

To set the stage for you, The Avengers have saved the world on many occasions.
In spite of that, some people don't trust them, since they have a Hulk!

The most vocal critic is a man named Dell Rusk, who just also happens to be the US Secretary of Defense.

If you don't know the Comic Book story that this is based on, I'll just tell you to look at all of the letters in his name.

What villain name can you spell with 'Pete Hegseth?'

Anyhow, imagine his delight in 'Nightmare in Red' (Season 2, Episode 9) when a mysterious new Hulk shows up on the SHIELD Hellicarrier to smash things up.

This one is Red!

Notably, Bruce Banner is far away with Hawkeye- not in his Hulk form.

They go to the Mansion when the attack hits.

Soon enough, look who shows up- The Falcon!

The pair of attacks are eventually foiled and the plan is revealed.

The Falcon, The Winter Soldier, Red Hulk and Doc Samson (who was also on the Hellicarrier) are all part of Code Red- a team formed by (wait for it) Dell Rusk.

Due to the unique nature of this Show- with a Season-long Plot and individual ones- this is not followed up on again until 11 Episodes later!

In 'Code Red,' the Mansion is gassed with a poison that turns you red.  Hmm...

The members of the titular team attack our Heroes in some one-on-one fights.

The Winter Soldier is awoken!  Dell Rusk's identity is revealed!

He's The Red Skull!

He's defeated, of course, (well, until the next Episode) and the day is saved yet again by a Nazi being punched in the face!

There's a bit more of the Red Hulk on the Show (see 'The Most Dangerous Man Alive') and The Falcon also gets in on the action once more.

A fun pair of Episodes that really get to show off The Red Hulk, who was a pretty new Character when these Episodes aired in 2010.

Will his Live-Action counterpart do as well?

Tubi Tuesday: The Legend of Black Annie (2015)

This Film was watched on Thursday.  I just was too damn tired to also Review it.
That said, this one has been in my Queue since I started this Segment!

Here's a treat for you- two Tubi Reviews in one week.

Here is...

A guy goes out hunting.

He sees weird smoke.

Strange things happen.
It all ends badly for him.

It turns out he's the Mayor of a small Town.

This death relates to a young girl named- shock of shocks- Annie (aka Black Annie) who was chased by some kids.

After putting this new footage behind a terrible, strobing filter, she ends up falling to her death.

In the present, those related to it are killed.

Will our Professor here be the one to solve the case before everyone in town dies mysteriously?

Well, the Film is pretty much just a series of these Scenes, with flashbacks and filler.

You know this this a flashback because they added a Filter to it.

Sigh.

Will Black Annie get her revenge on, well, just about everyone over the age of 40 in this Town?

Will the sleaziness of the Film make up for all of its faults?

To find out, stream it now.

I clearly didn't miss out on much after all of this time skipping this one on Tubi.

Simply put, the Film isn't good.

It really is just Death, Setup to new Death (with three people reading about it in the Papers), a little Plot and then that Death.

Maybe if the Death Scenes are good or interesting, I might still like it, you say nervously.

They aren't.

The Film looks and feels very cheap, from the Sets to the lazy Plot to the Filters.
None of it is that good.
None of the Characters are good.

I don't like to be the angry Reviewer or anything, but...I mean, this one is a bit of dumpster fire...or a completely realistic-looking Church Fire...

A Film that doesn't aspire to be much and, well, it succeeds.  None of it is just that interesting or original- sorry.

Fiction vs Fiction: Superman III (1983)

 Superman III is not a good Movie.

That said, is Superman III a good Book?

Well, readers, it was a Book, as it got a Novelization in the same year that it came out.
I paid 50 cents for it years ago and now you have to suffer for it!

I joke- I had to read the Book AND rewatch Superman III.  I'm the real loser here.

What's the Same?

The Plot is pretty much the same.  The Book just makes tweaks here and there.

It also seems to be based on the ORIGINAL Script and not the final product that is the Film.

That said, there are some WEIRD changes/additions!

What's Different?

Shockingly, there's actually MORE slapstick in the Intro than in the Film.
Were moments like 'A crane grabbing a bag from a ladder which had just grabbed it from a robber' cut?
Yes, it turns out.

In the Film, Lois leaves to go on Vacation and doesn't return until the Ending.
In the Book, we get a brief bit of her being confronted by strange men...and then nothing until the Ending.

In both versions, she reveals that she was kidnapped, escaped and exposed a crime ring.  Can we see that Story instead?!?

Here's a weird one for you...

Superman (as Clark) meets Lana Lang and her son Ricky.  He has to switch to Superman to save Ricky- who tripped and knocked himself out in a field.

While he carries him back, the Book says that the 'vibrations of energy' from Superman's body gave the weak boy strength that he never had.

This is not in the Movie- thank Siegel!

When Superman stops the storm created by Gus' manipulation of the Weather Satellite, it plays out a bit differently in the two mediums.

In the Book, we just 'see' what he did to save the day.
In the Film, Gus acts out what Superman does, while we get snippets of the Scene.

This added bit is based on something he did on Carson back when Superman II was out and led to him being cast in this Film.  META?

The main changes in the Book seem to be William Kotzwinkle adding dark subtext to Scenes that are in the Script.

For instance, in the Film, Gus slips down the slope on Ross Webster's roof for a gag.

In the Book, Ross' Sister Vera has the slope coated in water- making ice- as part of her plan to have Ross' Psychic Nutritionist fly off to her death when she used it later.

Damn!

Remember when Superman is greeted by the Mayor of Smallville when he visits in the Film?

Well, the Book adds a bit about him being indicted on criminal charges (for price-fixing) and hoping that this big celebration would distract from that.

Something you want to tell us, William?!?

Another change that might be one related to the Filmmakers making a rare, good decision...

In the Book, the almost-Kryptonite turns Superman evil...and green.  He gets green eyes and a green costume!

The suit later changes to a dark green and then black (for the Bar Scene).

Good call, Filmmakers.

The Film actually adds a couple bits, while cutting others.

A bit showing a Doctor in surgery when the power goes out (drained by the Computer) was cut.
Apparently, he was played by Frank Oz.

It is in the Book.

Not in the Book, however, is a bit where we see Lana and Ricky riding the subway into Metropolis (complete with stock footage from The Taking of Pelham One Two Three) when the power goes out.

The final one of note- the Ending bit with Gus feels different in the Book.

In the Film, he turns down a job, because comedy.  He also opens his shirt like Clark does to change...which raises so many questions.

In the Book, there's no shirt bit.

More importantly, Gus leaves because he thinks that the White Coal Miners had shotguns and were going to 'use him as target practice.

WTF, William?!?  This is Superman III!

Final Thoughts

The Book is a weird adaptation with its additions and tweaks.

Reading it, I began to suspect that adapting this bizarre screenplay got to the Writer.  Even early on, I could feel mental breaks as he's trying to recap that prolonged Slapstick Intro Bit.

This line stands out to me- 'Anyone familiar with the habits of rolling gumballs knows that they are unlikely stop until they find a delivery man carrying a tray of custard pies.'

That might be what lead him to add really dark, random additions to a bunch of Scenes like shown above.  It's like that bit from Family Guy's version of Return of the Jedi.

Regardless, this is still an adaptation of Superman III.
It's a dumb Film.
No need to make it weird, William.

After all, this was the average reaction of most Superman fans after it came out...

The Film is dumb and silly, but not without some charm.
The Book is mostly the same, just with random changes that just boggle the mind.

Streaming Standard: Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man- Episodes 1 and 2

 Ahead of a slightly fuller Marvel Film Calendar in 2025, let's check out the Premiere Episodes of their latest Animated Show.

It is Spider-Man, but things aren't exactly the same.

He is...

Peter is a dork.

That said, he's gotten into a fancy Tech High School and meets a new friend.

Too bad a strange creature attacks and he's bitten by a spider!

Now he's at a new High School- as the old one was pretty wrecked- and fights crime on the side as Spider-Man.

No, it's not Spider-Boy.
That's a different, more confusing Marvel Comics Character.

As usual, he's got a girl he pines of.

As usual, he's got no shot.

He's stayed friends with Nico from the climactic day at the old School and she keeps him balanced.

As a crime-fighter, he helps out Harry Osborn.
That will probably be helpful later.

Can he balance school life, his personal one AND that of a crime fighter?

Of course not.

Even so, I'm curious to see where this one goes in the next several Episodes!

A fun reinvention of a very familiar tale for a new Audience.

Did we need another Spider-Man Show?
Maybe not.

How many has he had now?

That said, this one feels like a nice blend of the original Comics run (the Lee-Ditko Era), some new elements for 2024/5 and simple tweaking here and there.

This feels like a '60s Spider-Man in all of the right ways.
This also doesn't feel dated, as everything is made new in little ways throughout.

Tropes are subverted.
Characters get new depth.
A Plot gets turned on its head.

Simply put, this Show does something new, while still giving us a classic feel.

Just for fun, here's some fanart that certainly won't trigger anyone.

A fun Show that balances its twists and changes with a good feel.  Keep it up!

Shudder Day: The Vourdalak (2024)

I didn't get around to seeing Nosferatu yet.

In lieu of that, here's a freaky French Vampire Film.  Mon dieu!

Long ago, a man who's an Emissary for the King of France runs into trouble.

Off-camera, he's robbed and left alone in a foreign land.

A strange man tells him to go to a House down the road into the Forest.

He runs across a strange woman and follows her to her House.

He tries to woo her while the rest of the Family waits for the Patriarch of the Family to arrive.

Can he get into her pantaloons?

The Father arrives and...he's something.

I won't SPOIL what's up with him other than the fact that he's a form of Vampire.

To find out how the rest of his stay goes, stream the Film now.

A very strange Film- no question.

To be fair, it is a Period Piece Horror Film from France about a Vampire.

That's plenty of odd things together.

The best way I could describe this one is that it feels similar to a Jean Rollin Film.
That will probably tell you whether you're going to like it or not.

It is a tonally strange Film, alternating from Drama to Absurdist Comedy to Horror and then back again.

I won't SPOIL the effects used for the Vampire other than to tell you two things- it is freaky and I love it.

Will this one be for everyone?
Absolutely not.

Do I regret giving it a watch?
Absolument pas.

A strange, very French Film about another fringe kind of Vampire.  It's just not going to be for everyone- just like escargot.