Friday, February 21, 2025

Remake This?: Assault on Precinct 13 (2005)

 A John Carpenter Film was always a sight to see.

A John Carpenter Film Remake though?  Hmm...

This is 2005's Remake of Assault on Precinct 13.  It was Directed by a French Director who hasn't done a whole lot in America (save for the recent Plane).

Amusingly (at least to me) there's a weird parallel between this one and The Purge, the Film that put Ethan Hawke back on the map.

Is there a reason to watch a new version of a Film that's already a Remake (of Rio Bravo)?  To find out, read on...

In the Film's Cold Open, Hawke works Undercover making a deal to catch a Russian Drug Dealer (Titus Welliver).

It goes poorly, ending in his two partners being shot and killed.
At least he took out Bosch.
Nearly a year later, he's running Precinct 13 in Detroit.

The place is being shut down in a few days as the Year ends.
Oh shit- this is a Holiday Film!!
A big time Criminal was caught and he was being transported.

However, the roads are bad, so the truck diverged to their Precinct.

A half-drunk, fully depressed Hawke reluctantly accepts it.
As the people party with the prisoners down in the Basement Cells, masked shooters show up.

They take the power out and lay siege.

They want one man- Lawrence Fishburne!
It turns out that the people behind the siege/assault is the lead Cop in the City- Gabriel Byrne.

No joke- when he first appeared on screen, I said 'Well, he's the bad guy.'

They want Fishburne, since they were corrupt Cops and he can testify against them.
Sadly, the united front of the Cops and the Criminals doesn't work out too well.

The criminals- including Ja Rule and John Leguizamo- get killed off as things get worse.

The latter didn't test well in Screenings.
Fishburne doesn't play well with them either, at one point trying to get away by using a Cop as a human shield.

The corrupt cops keep at them as one of the old Cop- Brian Dennehy- betrays them as well.
Fishburne and Hawke end up in the nearby Woods, pursued by the corrupt Cops.

Can they stop the villains?
Yes, but both men are wounded.

Hawke allows Fishburne to get away as the Credits roll.
We get KSI rapping the Plot of the Film and we're done.
A good Film, even if it feels a bit drawn out.  I guess a siege should feel that way, eh?

The Film is alright.  I haven't seen the Original in close to a Decade, but I have good memories of it.  This one doesn't do too much badly.

That said, having Maria Bello to be around just to act scared, nervous and die is a damn waste.  I'm supposed to feel sad when she dies.
I'm just annoyed at how pointless this is.

Outside of that, the Film has good action, drama and was shot well.

I didn't hate this one.  I just ultimately lost interest before it was all over.

While this one didn't have John Carpenter there, it did have a 'Carpenter' on Set...

Next up, a pretty famous Crime Film that is appropriate for this Month.  It has great critical acclaim, but will I like it?  Stay tuned...

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