'90s Class: Sphere (1998)

 Jurassic Park was a hit, so they all must be, right?  Right?

This is 1998's Sphere, one of many Michael Crichton Film Adaptations from the 1990s.  To be fair, the track record is pretty good.  Besides JP, there's Disclosure, Rising Sun, Congo and...The 13th Warrior.  Again- a 'pretty good' track record.

This one, oddly, comes to us from Director Barry Levinson, who is not the person you think of when you think 'Let's give $80 million to make this Sci-Fi Film,' is it?  No knock on the guy- it's just not his niche.

With many Stars- Dustin Hoffman, Sharon Stone and Samuel L. Jackson-, Character Actors- Peter Coyote, Liev Schreiber- and two different Musicians/Performers on board, this couldn't have lost money, right?  Right?

To find out how, read on...

A quartet of Experts- Hoffman, Stone, Jackson and Schrieber- are sent to make first contact- oops, someone took that Title first!- with an alien ship.

The problem- the plan is based on a paper written by Hoffman...who was just kind of just winging it.

Whoops.

They go to the Wreck, which apparently has been there for hundreds of years.

Of course, this 2 hour plus Film makes you wait until about 20 minutes in to get there...

They find strange stuff- like logs mentioning people being there IN THE FUTURE- and eventually come across the titular object.

It's apparently silver in the Book, but when they did it for the Film it looked off.

I honestly like this change.

The group are trapped by an unseen storm- I guess there was no room in the Budget for wind- and things change when one of them goes into the Sphere.

Given that its the title object, it probably might be big.

While he's asleep, strange stuff starts to happen and the ancillary Characters start to die.

The Film works to fill out a Mad Lib that you never expected- STAR killed by CREATURE.

Did you pick- Queen Latifah killed by Jellyfish?  

You win!

They begin to communicate with some sort of spirit/being that exists in the computers/sphere.

It starts out friendly...until it decidedly does not.

The rest of the ancillary Cast dies off (which includes Liev Schrieber at this point in 1998) and the remaining Cast must figure out the mystery.

As it turns out, the Sphere- which they all entered at some point- brought their thoughts/fears to life and played them against each other.

As a final test, they must agree to let the Sphere wipe their memory of everything.

So, yeah, the whole Film is, say it with me, entirely pointless.

Now in an arty way.  The End.

A pretty good Film, if a bit slow and dense at times.  They sure take their time setting things up.  This works...to a point.

The actual Sci-Fi element of this is pretty interesting.  The Setting looks nice.  Even if $80 million was too much to spend on this, you see the money on screen.  FYI the Budget for Jurassic Park was $63 million.  Which was a better investment?

Weirdly, the Film acts vague with so many aspects and never quite shows some things.  Shouldn't we have seen one Squid?  We see lots of baby ones and all of those jellyfish, but I'd like to see more.  Was it a Budget thing?  Again- $80 million.  Did they make it and it was crap, so they cut it?

Sphere is a Sci-Fi Film with a good premise, but it kind of botches the execution.  At least it has this Huey Lewis Cameo.

Next time, a '90s Horror Film that I've remembered being a thing for a couple of Decades.  Was it finally worth the watch?  Stay tuned...

Buy The DVD: 'Sphere' Explains What Science-Fiction Is.

 Have you ever wondered what Science Fiction is?
Have you ever thought 'Is this Movie considered to be Sci-Fi or something else?'

Well, if you have, there's a solution:

Use Wikipedia.

If that's out, buy the DVD of Michael Crichton's Sphere to see how in the most random Special Feature I've seen yet.

First, you click on 'Special Features' to get you to THIS Menu.

Clicking on the first link is obvious.
Clicking on the last link gives you the SFs specific to THIS Film (like a limited Commentary Track).

That vague-sounding middle link brings you to this Screen...

A simple explanation.

Great.

There's more, however when you click Continue.

…and more still.

This goes on for THIRTY-ONE Pages (as it were) going from the beginning to modern Films (as of 1997, that is).

It's informative.

That said, why is someone's Thesis Paper on the History and Definition of Science-Fiction on here?!?

Thanks...I guess.

'90s Class?: The 13th Warrior

 Before you see The Northman, see...um, the Eastman?  This is The 13th Warrior, the 1999 Film that adapts Michael Crichton's book (which is not called this).  It involves Vikings, so me randomly-deciding to watch/review it this week works out.  Thanks, Odin!

The Plot involves an Arab Man...played by Antonio Banderas who ends up with some Northmen as an Ambassador for his King.  He's dragged into a mission with them, in spite of him not being a Warrior.  The Plot is a mix of a real tale- well, 'real' in that someone told it, not 'real' as in it likely having happened- and Beowulf.  Why not?

The Film cost alot of money (it cost $150 million plus), got delayed for 2 years and ended up losing alot of money (around $125 million).  It's also ended up being the second-to-last Film (so far) from Director John McTiernan (the guy who made Die Hard and Predator).  It's also the last Film (for sure) that was Directed (for Reshoots) by Michael Crichton (who died in 2008).  

Was it good though?  Let's find out...

Ibn (Banderas) tells us via Flashback Narration (double clichés!) that he made eyes at the King's woman and was made an 'Ambassador' to a far-off land full of Vikings.

If you want to know who wasn't a fan of this Film, it was Omar Sharif, who quit Acting for 3 years after this.

At a big Gathering (the old King has died and a new one is chosen), a kid from a neighboring Tribe says that they were overrun by savages.  A Soothsayer says that they can succeed if '13 Warriors go...and that one of them must not be a Viking.'

It was you or Shariff, buddy.  You're the fake Arab, so you go! 

He bonds with the Vikings by learning their language in record time by the power of observation.

That's...sure, why not?

The group- which includes a kid...until the next Scene- arrive at the Village and learn what happened.

That night, they are attacked by the Berserkers and two of them die.  So I guess you're down to 10 now.

They prepare the Village for a major attack the next night, which of course is preceded by a last minute rescue of a Villager by Banderas.

The Berserkers are just as deadly- killing 3 more Warriors- but not as careful.

Now they know that they are just men who act like Bears (but also ride horses and use weapons).

Realizing that they can't withstand many attacks like this, they take the advice of another Soothsayer and take the fight to them.

They find the Cave they live in and try to take out the Leader.

I guess she was an old woman originally (like in the Book), but they replaced her with this would-be Enchantress in Reshoots.

She's killed, but poisons the lead Viking.

Sadly, this does not break their ranks and they go in for one last attack.

The upset Warriors- down another person or two- get rallied by their King and fight on!

The win the day, but the King falls dead from the poison.

Ibn returns home as a Hero, promising to tell their tale in Writing.  This ignores the fact that Vikings had written language for the last 1,000 years, but whatever.  The End.

A good, ambitious Film that definitely tried to do alot.  Does it always succeed?  No.  Does it often fail?  No.

The worst complaint you can make is that the Film is sometimes shallow Set Pieces.  It often tries to be more- by giving a few Characters an Arc, for instance- but it doesn't always work.  When some guys randomly die trying to save people, for instance, it feels kind of abrupt and not some big, earned moment.

The bulk of the Film succeeds at being a realistic-looking tale of the time, which is good.  It's nice to see these Films that went way over-budget actually LOOK like they spent some money.  The Casting of Banderas, of course, is...just a thing that you'd expect from '90s Hollywood.

The 13th Warrior is a good Film for fans of Period Action Films, Vikings and this kind of stuff.  It's no Lord of the Rings or anything, but it is good.  One sin- relegating Sven Ole-Thorson to a Cameo Role...

Next time, let's go back to the '70s for some classy Drama.  When a Superman and a Batman Actor face off, sparks will fly.  Stay tuned...

'90s Trash?: Congo

At long last, I see if any of this as good to me as it was in 1995.  Today's Film is Congo, a Film I haven't seen in full since it was actually in Theaters.  It's one of those 'Always on Cable sometime' Movies though.  It's like Russian Roulette with some Films- the ending is just guaranteed to be better.  

Having spent a whole $1 on this, will I get my money's worth?  

To look at Congo, you have to remember where we were when it came out.  It's based on a Michael Crichton Book and one of those made 'all of the money' just recently.  You know the one, right?  Coming off of that, a bunch of Books became Films, including Disclosure, Sphere and The 13th Warrior.  This is one of the more remembered, but also forgotten.  In fact, the Film is most famous for a Mandela Effect moment.  

It's also remembered as 'That Film with Bruce Campbell in it for 5 minutes.'  Somehow the Studio rejected him as the Lead (aw!) and gave him this tiny part instead.  

It is the Film that made you ask the question 'Which one is the real Ape and which one is the guy in a suit?'  The Plot involves a 'talking' Ape, some hidden treasure, telecom technology and Ernie Hudson.  He really steals the Movie, which is hard when you consider that he's competing with Tim Curry doing a funny accent!  

Is the Film good?  

Will I still like it?  

To find out, read on...

A Telecom Company has an expedition going to find some diamonds to something something make phones work better.

The Leader- Campbell- is seemingly-killed, although the Movie acts like you don't know that for some reason.

With that cut, he's totally dead!

The lead women- Laura Linney- goes against her Boss- 'Mitchell'- and tries to save Bruce.

As such, she buys her way onto an expedition with Not Bruce and Amy, his 'talking' monkey (using sign language to create a form of text to speech via computer).

They team up with Ernie here and Curry (a Character not in the Book) to take Amy back home...but mostly find the diamonds!

After lots of shooting and adventure, they find the hidden place known as King Solomon's Mines.  

What's it secret?

They trained Gray Gorillas to be the Guards...only to be killed by them and the City lost to History.

Of course- why didn't I think of that?!?

Linney finds the diamond to power this Film's Chekhov's Gun- a laser that cuts up the Gorillas!

They escape the Volcano- which erupts with dramatic timing- and Amy finds her home, leaving the survivors to fly away in a balloon.

Those eyes...I mean, The End.

A weird and kind of fun Film.  Is it good?  No.  The Plot is all sorts of a mess.  We have a Primatologist and Amy.  We have Linney working for a Tech Company.  We have Curry looking for a Lost City.  We have Ernie Hudson and company just trying to survive.  There's too much going on, but also not enough going on.  They rush through the last part of the Story.  

As such, they slow down a lot once they get into Africa.  Pacing is way off in this one, mostly in the middle.  They get to Africa in the first 20 minutes, but then don't get to the City until over an hour in.  Does that feel right?  

The big draw here is the Special Effects.  I'll say this- hats off to the people who made those Animatronic Apes and Suits.  That said, they are 100% not convincing.  They look interesting, but never like actual Apes of any kind.  As I said, good work at creating things- just not convincing creatures of any kind.  The evil Gorillas look neat- just not real- and terrifying.  The Plot involving them is so weird that I now really want to see a Prequel explaining it.  

Seriously, a group of people bred and trained attack Gorillas to guard a Mine- make that Movie! 

 In summary, Congo is a fun and silly Film.  If you remember it from the '90s, it won't hold up as well as a good Film...but it's just as fun.  Bonus points for a random Jimmy Buffet Cameo too.

Next time, I hop back to the '70s to see a Film related to a recent box office disappointment.  When in doubt, add more Monsters!  Stay tuned...