Svengoolie Special: The Devil's Rain (1975)

 As a fan of Robert Fuest- Director of the greatest Film ever made-, I'd avoided this one.  It's his last big, commercial Film.  It's failure is attributed to him doing TV Movies and the like for the rest of his career- see my look at Revenge of the Stepford Wives.

Well, Svengoolie played it, so I watched it.

Made in 1975, The Devil's Rain is all about Satan, family and, well, rain.  There's both more and less to it than that.  You get an eclectic Cast that includes Ernest Borgnine, William Shatner, Tom Skeritt, Ida Lupino and more.

It's famously-bad, but also by a great Director.  Can it be?  Let's see...

A family- Ida Lupino and William Shatner- are waiting for their missing Dad/Husband (respectively) to return.

He does, but as a mostly-melted figure in the rain.

He tells them to return the Book.

Shatner is lured outside, whereupon Mom is kidnapped (in like 20 seconds!).

He goes to a Ghost Town to confront the man behind it- Ernest Borgnine.

He 'bets' his faith (and a magical medallion) against Borgnine's.

He loses.

Ruh roh.

His Brother- Tom Skeritt- and his Girlfriend- who is Psychic- follow the Case, but the Sheriff (of the unseen nearby Town) won't help.

I mean, he's obviously in the Cult, right?  Right.

Things go awry as the pair narrowly escape the Ghost Town, but Skeritt goes back.

Meanwhile, his Girlfriend is captured...when she crashes the Car due to being scared.

Tom here does the 'put on Robes to watch the Ceremony' bit, but is discovered by a Cult Member...played by John Travolta?!?

Yep, he's fully-masked and not famous...but would become famous before the Film came out, so he's Credited.

He's too late to stop the Ceremony- not that he tries too hard to do so- and Shatner is now part of the Cult.

We get a prolonged flashback to explain things involving the Psychic Girlfriend...

The short version- Puritan Shatner turned in Puritan Borgnine, who cursed his family in death and vowed to return.  He needs the Book of Souls to fully gain his power.

That said, he can swap places with this Goat Man version of himself, so he does have SOME powers.

Only one thing can stop him...

Alongside Eddie Albert (!!!), Skeritt must destroy the titular Devil's Rain- a big orb thing that holds the souls of Borgnine's Cult Members.

To be clear, this is different than the Book containing them signing away their souls.

Shatner ends up smashing it, leading to a VERY LONG section of the Cult Members melting.

We also get the inexplicable Good Ending Fake-Out with Borgnine somehow stealing the Psychic Lady's soul...apparently and going to try again.

Gee- who would try to take away a Happy Ending like that.

Oh, right.

Yeah, it's not great.  This point in the '70s was weird for Cinema as the newest Trend seemed to be, well, Satan Movies.  Thanks alot, William Friedkin!

This is an odd example of a Film that both tries too hard, but also gets a bit lazy.  Yes, you can do both in one Film.

They get really creative with the whole Cult transformation aspect and the look of alot of things, especially the titular prop.  They do this prolonged flashback bit- which is oddly-timed- and try pretty hard.  At the same time, they prolong the ending way too much.  It's gotta be a good 5-10 minutes of just watching the bodies 'melt.'  Thanks?

In spite of its many problems, the Film is quite historically-notable.  It's the first Film for Travolta and, allegedly, where he was introduced to Scientology.  I hope L. Ron gave Fuest a cut!  There's also the fact that it was *allegedly* funded by the Mafia, which just doubles up with the whole Church of Satan involvement aspect.  I just wish that the Film itself was actually better.  

Maybe if you watch it with the companion album to see if they sync up...

Next up, I return to the surprisingly-alright-so-far 4-Film Set.  Will it keep surprising me?  Stay tuned...

Old School TV: Boris Karloff's Thriller- 'The Hungry Glass'

After re-watching Targets, I had a desire to see more Karloff and old-school stuff.  In lieu of watching The Terror, I picked his TV Show.

This is one of the random Episodes I just happen to have, so let's see what's going with...

A young couple- including a just 30-year old William Shatner!- buy a House that has a 'haunted history.'

 The place has a history of glass-related injuries and deaths, but they try to ignore.  To be fair, Goldberg stayed there once and nothing bad ever happened to him involving broken glass.

Shatner tries to act cool, but he starts to see things.

They eventually find all of the mirrors- which were hidden- in a locked room.  Nice and creepy stuff.

He shows a picture he took of a ghost to the seller- The Professor from Gilligan's Island!- but they both question their sanity a bit.

He tells Shatner the story about how the original owner 'lived in her mirrors' (seeing herself as young forever) until she died there decades later.

Shatner burns the picture, vowing to forget all of this...

...until he hears a scream from upstairs.  He goes into the Mirror Room and sees...the ghosts taking his wife away!

He rushes over to save her...by smashing up the mirror.  I'm not sure I follow your logic.

When he comes to, he finds that he had actually been smashing up his wife!

In a panicky and confused state, he sees the now-ghost of his wife by the bay windows and jumps to get her...

In the aftermath, the Professor takes his passed out wife and leaves.  Have fun with the Police!

A dark, interesting Story.  The people in it are very relatable, which is what a story like this needs.  They make sure to explain that the wife is 'suggestible' and Shatner has past issues with 'hallucinations.'  You get what would become a classic Shatner monologue as he talks about his past issues with hallucinations during his time in the Korean War/Conflict.  They even give him one of the 'turn your head back to the camera' moves to really show off his Shatner-ness.  This is 1961, mind you, so this is just something they did and it has nothing to do with what would become his big moves.  He does a really good job here being vulnerable, but also hamming it up a bit for the big monologues.  Honestly everyone is really good here, from both ladies to Russell Johnson playing straight and serious across from Shatner.  The effects are nice and subdued here.  The ghosts are usually pretty blurry, but, you know, they are ghosts.  When they show up, they are important.  It helps that the original Writer here is Robert Bloch, so you're starting with something good.  One day I'll watch one of these with Shatner and he'll survive.  Until then, I'll just wonder why they rear projected this GIANT MIRROR as the background for Karloff's Intro.

A classic Episode that you should definitely check out.  Kirk + The Professor + The Writer of Psycho = Win.

Forgotten TV: Ray Bradbury Theater- 'The Playground'

I found a set of Episodes from the Show for super-cheap on the 2nd hand market.  I eventually figured out that I actually had *ALL* of the Episodes.  Yea for me.

The Show features a slew of famous Guest Stars.  I decided to boldly go with Shatner.  This is...

...and the Episode is...

Shatner plays a widowed Father who is close with his son, but there's a catch.

He refuses to let his son play in a Public Park for reasons that he won't explain.

The reason: he sees visions of scary children and freaky faces.

This Show did come out after Demons, so I'm calling 'inspiration' on this look.

He finally confesses his fears to his Sister, explaining that bullies picked on him during what looked to be the 1930s.  He really is dressed like he's in Newsies!

Young Shatner had really curly hair.  Why doesn't adult Shatner?

Oh, right.

It all leads to a climax that I will explain as best I can.

He gives a pep talk to the son, which leads to the son to keep saying 'I'm the daddy.  I'm the daddy.'

Shatner makes a rush for the 'kid' that he sees (his bully) and is pushed down the slide...

While going down, there are weird light flashes and they somehow reverse order (with the kid coming down first).

When Shatner comes down, he acts...different.

So did the kid's soul/spirit switch with his Dad's?  Are the spirits real or in Shatner's head?

To get the answers, you can...not get them.  No such luck.  The End.

What a weird start.  The Story is interesting, but the fact that there is no clear resolution is a bummer.  Stories that make you think are good.  Stories that make you scratch your head in confusion are not.  Am I just too dumb to understand this clearly?  Maybe.  Should I need to read multiple Reviews of the Episode to figure out as much as I did?  No.  With that negativity out of the way, the Episode is shot well, has good Acting and great Atmosphere.  They managed to make a public playground seem ominous.  Kudos to all of the kid Actors for doing their parts too.  It's a neat Episode and I'm sure that the rest of the Series is more clear, but the Ending does still hurt it.  I've got 64 more of these to watch and possibly review, so the odds are in my favor.  I do get a kick out of reading Credits sometimes, especially when you realize that it was someone's job to 'corral' all of those kids...

Next time, another Star and Bradbury tale.  Will it be one you know?  See you then...

Syndicated Incorporated: TekWar

In today's segment, we talk about something that was very big for a little while and then faded into obscurity.  Besides Greg Evigan, we are also going to talk about the television series based on William Shatner's novels in which he starred.  They also had four made-for-tv movies, but that is for another day.

Tekwar

Basically, it is a pretty stock future.  Fancy gadgets, fast cars and holograms, etc.  What is unique, however, is the idea of Tek.  Basically, it is like logging into the internet, only it zaps your neural cortex and gives a drug-like effect.  Mind you, for many people, that describes the actual internet, but that's beside the point.

Our hero is a tough-talking, play-by-his-own-rules detective who works for a private security firm run by a billionaire.  Said billionaire is played by Shatner himself, clad in as many brightly-colored, overly-patterned shirts you could possibly imagine.  For him, the future looks a lot like very-dated 90s fashion!

The guy has all of the usual trappings too, including the smart girlfriend and the black partner.  If you expect anything other than cliches here, you will be somewhat disappointed.

One issue with the series in what I watched of it were references that are never quite explained.  For example, they refer to some big battle in Brazil in the 2nd episode, which I imagine is a bigger plot point in the books.  It's not terrible, just a little distracting.

If you like fun cliches and action, do yourself a favor and check out this series on DVD.  It won't blow you away, but it won't really disappoint either.

Next up, a tv show starring a staple of late '80s/early '90s action: Michael Dudikoff.  Unfortunately, it got a bit upstaged by a now-equally obscure television show.  Stay tuned...

Captain's Log: Visiting Hours

Star Trek was a good show, although it had its sketchy moments. T.J. Hooker was not. Boston Legal was a really good show, albeit silly and erratic in tone. I give you all of this information to give you a good idea about the star of all of these: William Shatner. His films have had the range of good (Kingdom of the Spiders), quirky (Incubus) and bad (The Devil's Rain). Today's film is none of those though. It is...

Visiting Hours

The film begins with a woman giving a stirring speech on a network news show. When a film immediately reminds me of The Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf, it is not good. Our lady does not turn into a white wolf, but, instead is rebuked by her boss (Shatner). He tells her that it is dangerous to talk out about a person that is still on the streets and refuses to play the video. Keep this in mind. She goes home, but finds her roommate/sister/this movie never really explains her importance has left the house a mess. After a long build-up, a threat reveals itself as...

*

Shirtless Michael Ironside covered in earrings! If that is not scary, nothing is! He chases her around, stabs her a couple of times and, finally, thwarts her escape via Dumb Waiter. Rather than killing her, he lets her live another day, which turns out to be in the hospital. She is told that she has to undergo surgery to fix her wounded arm and her boss visits her (fulfilling the second of his five scenes). She is befriended by a nice nurse, but her attacker is still loose. Disguised as a flower delivery man, he gets into the hospital and finds the woman's room. He sees a woman on life-support and cuts her tube. It turns out that they moved our heroine, although the whorish nurse is killed for investigating. Not Whore Nurse!!

*

This movie tends to venture into numerous side-plots that feel unrelated at this point. Our villain picks up a woman at a soda joint. She comes home with him...because a balding Ironside in a vinyl shirt is irresistible, but it turns bad and fast! He rapes her and then the scene cuts. We also get a glimpse of the nurse's home life, which includes a daughter and a young lady who looks like more than just a babysitter. Maybe it's because she suddenly sits down next to the woman on her bed in only a towel that makes me think that. The woman is divorced, which apparently I care about. Plus, we get Ironside at an old folk's home with his dad. We get Psycho IV-style flashbacks to sort-of explain the villain's motivation. Where did you go, plot?

*

I have to address one glaring problem with this movie: the premise. It is built entirely around Michael Ironside's ability to blend in and get into any building. Is he at all inconspicuous? He never once stops making his evil face, but wears glasses or different uniforms. Picture Ted Bundy. Now picture him in glasses. Would you automatically let your guard down around this person? Hell no. In fairness, this is sort of a Catch-22. The guy looks really creepy and is effective in the role. He is simply not believable as a master of disguise, glasses or not.

*

The movie does get pretty good in the finale, although some stuff is a bit sketchy. The villain tricks his way into the hospital, while the police find his apartment thanks to a very elaborate group of subplots. Basically, the girl he raped goes to a Free Clinic that our nurse just happens to work at one day a week. She later comes to the nurse and proves useful to the plot. He attacks our heroine again, but she manages to flee. She is tricked into taking the elevator into the basement, which appears to be the same one from Clonus. In a stupid twist, it is also where another one of his victims is being treated. Really, movie?!? She manages to trick the man and stabs him to death. No, wait! He's still alive for one last...never mind. He's dead. The End.

*

In all honesty, this movie is pretty good. It is for that reason that it avoided being classified as '80s Trash.' Shatner is barely in the movie, but does liven it up when he appears. Ironside is very good at his role, even if it is barely-written. He is solely a crazy man who hates strong women due to a past incident. No complexity here, people. The pacing is pretty well and it does not always jump right to the killing. If you can accept the absurdity of Ironside sneaking past everyone, you can have a good time.

*

You want more Mondo and more Macabro. Okay. Stay tuned...