Tubi Thursday: Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (2010)

Guillermo Del Toro was apparently a big fan of the 1973 TV Movie.

As such, we got a Remake in Theaters in 2010.

Let's see if it was necessary...

In a Flashback Scene, a guy named Lord Blackwood makes a sacrifice to some unseen creatures to free his Son.

It goes poorly.

In the Present, a divorced Dad (Guy Pearce) and his new Girlfriend (Katie Holmes) move into the same House.

His Daughter is forced to move in with him too.

She's not happy.
Not about any of this.

She uncovers the hidden entrance to the Basement, in spite of the Groundskeeper's protests.

She opens the grate and the unseen creatures try to bring her comfort.

When she finally sees them, however, they are far less friendly.

Their lashing out against the Parents makes her look guilty as well, which doesn't help.

Holmes believes the girl- as much as she can- and gives her a polaroid camera, knowing that whatever she sees is afraid of light.

Can she finally convince people that the creatures are real?
Can Holmes find out what is going on?

Do I kind of miss the furry guys with almond shaped heads?

To find out the answers to (most of) those questions, stream it now.

A Remake that does its own thing most of the time.

That said, this one feels familiar in many ways.

Del Toro is one of the 3 Writers (counting the 1973 Film's Writer) and boy, does it show!

It takes place at a Gothic Mansion, has a kid experiencing fairy tale trauma, the creatures are a form of fairies and the Dad is not a lot of help.

I'll just say this too- making the Heroine into a kid is a Cheat Code for mining sympathy.

If you don't know the Original, you won't see the story beats from it (the groundskeeper being attacked, tripping people with the rope).

Again- this Film is much more than just the same Film again.

Even so, I feel like if we just got someone like Del Toro to make an updated version of the original in its essence, it would be better.

As it is, I feel pulled between two divergent opinions- this is different and should it be?

A Film that is thankfully more than just a shinier, CGI-filled Remake.  That said, it is too familiar in about every other way.

Tubi Thursday: The Crazies (2010)

 We're covering the Remake first this time, since Tubi is going to drop it by next week.

Will this one set a bar to be topped by the Romero original?

Let's find out...

A small town in Iowa seems nice.

Everyone is happy and having a baseball game when a strange man wanders onto the field.

The Sheriff is forced to shoot him down.

Another crazy person shows up the next day, this one having burned down his House with his family in it.

In the Station, he stands oddly still and silent *the entire time*

A tip sends them out into the nearby Swamp (in Iowa?) and they find a plane crash.

Is this the source of what is going on?

That night, the Military show up and put everyone in a Camp.

Uh oh!

If they turn out to be Giant Rats again, I'm out!

They separate some people for testing, while locking the women up separately.

After chaos at the gate (where most of the people run away), they don't notice a Crazy wandering in to kill them all.

And yes, this guy is the one responsible for the branding of the pitchfork being dragged along the floor.

They eventually run across a Government stooge- played by famous 'That Guy' Actor Glenn Morshower- and find out the secret.

Can our Heroes survive?
To find out, stream it now (just hurry if you want to see it on Tubi).

A Film that is honestly pretty darn good, even if it never elaborates on much.

This one does a decent job of making a nice, normal-looking Town and then having it go into chaos.  I would have done maybe a bit more to establish it though.

Modern Film Producers surely insist on a big Scene like the Shooting to happen early, but maybe be a bit more patient.

The titular infected- again with that term! - aren't anything more than just slightly angrier people that want to kill you with whatever is nearby.

If you're expecting more, it isn't here.

There is also one Scene where 2 Crazies can speak and plan...which seems in contrast to all of the others.

The Crazies doesn't aim for much than a Character focused series of kills and jump scares & it does deliver.  
Is that enough of a ringing endorsement?

A Remake that has all of the modern touches you'd expect.  If you expect more than what the Title promises, you'll be disappointed.

Animated Fun: Green Lantern- The Animated Series: Season 1

 As part of my continuous quest to not give HBO Max (or whatever it will be called when you read this) money, I bought a DVD of Season 1 of the short-lived Green Lantern cartoon.

I remember enjoying this one when it was originally on.

After over a decade, how does it hold up?

To find out, read on...

Hal Jordan (the Film act somewhat as a Sequel to the Film, so no origin story) and Kilowogg are told about some incidents in deep space.

Lanterns are being killed (they can't say that explicitly, of course) and they go to investigate.

This involves 'borrowing' a new ship (with the help of a Guardian) and going into this bit of Space with sparse protection and mostly-untrained Lanterns.

The pair run across a new threat- Red Lanterns!

These people/aliens are powered by Rage/Anger, as opposed to Willpower like our Heroes.

Their leader is an Alien named Atrocitus and he wants revenge on the Guardians for past crimes (or so he says).

Razer- one of the Red Lanterns left behind- goes from their prisoner to cautious helper.

Essentially, he also wants to stop Atrocitus, but only for leaving him to die.

The ship's AI takes on a robot form named Aya and sparks (not literally- yet) fly between them.

This Show is based on the then-pretty new expanded lore of the Lanterns.

As such, we meet the Star Sapphires, who wield the power of Love.

Is there more going on though?

Season 1 sets up an invasion of Red Lanterns.

Can they stop it?

Maybe with some help...but it is still a toss-up.

To find out, watch Season 1 now.

A really fun Show that rewards you for paying attention as it goes on.

The serialized nature of the Show works great, with Characters getting Arcs and things all coming to a head.

St. Walker shows up early on, just so he can be important later (see above).
Razer's backstory is deep and gains a few twists and turns along the way.

Kilowogg grows from gruff Commander to fully fleshed out person over 13 Episodes.

Even Atrocitus goes from snarling villain to guy with a somewhat justified vendetta!

The only complaint I've seen about the Show that I do get is the fact that he's off of Earth from 98% of the Show, denying us a chance to see his non-space-based Villains.
That's fair.
Minor, but fair.

The whole thing is quite enjoyable and I spaced out my viewing over a couple of weeks to slightly-simulate the natural pacing of my original watch.

Speaking of which, now I'm left without a way to watch Season 2 right now.  All I've got is...

A Show that has held up well, doing more justice (pun intended) to Hal and company than the 2011 Film.  Seek it out.

Remake This: The Wolfman (2010)

Hey, we should remake The Wolfman, said someone 15 years ago.
Hey, we should remake The Wolfman, said someone a year ago.

This is, well, The Wolfman, the 2010 Remake specifically.  I'm a fan of the Universal Classic.  In fact, it is literally my Mouse Pad!

This is honestly a case where I'm not opposed to a Remake, as it had been nearly 80 years since the 1941 Original.
Well, 77 years to be exact, as the Film was actually made in 2008.  It just sat in limbo until 2010.

The Plot hits all of the same beats, but changes many, many things.  For better or worse, it is a loose Remake.  It also seems to borrow elements from another Werewolf Film (or two).

Joe Johnston- who has a great niche as Guy Who Can Direct Modern Film that is Set in the Past- did his best here, I think.  If you don't know the name, he did Captain America- The First Avenger, October Sky, Jumanji, Hidalgo and The Rocketeer (all of which fit the Theme mentioned in many ways).

He also Directed Jurassic Park III, but let's not hold that against him.

Can Benicio Del Toro take over for Lon Chaney Jr?
To find out, read on...

In a rare Syfy Opening for a Theatrical Film, a man is chased and killed by a Wolfman!

Oh no!

Said man turns out to be the Brother of our Hero- Del Toro- who meets a man on a Train (an uncredited Max Von Sydow).

Said man tells a tale of a Werewolf and gives him a silver cane- complete with hidden blade- before disappearing forever.

That is if you watch the Director's Cut- which I did.
I'm a sucker for Director's Cuts.  I need help!

He returns home to his Dad...who is somehow Anthony Hopkins (just go with it!) and he's clearly bonkers.

This is a change from the Original, where his Dad- more famous as The Invisible Man- is the voice of reason.

You don't hire Hopkins to play subtle though, unless it is real Oscar bait.

As the next Full Moon approaches, Del Toro gets friendly with his dead Brother's fiancée (Emily Blunt) which isn't weird at all.

He goes to the Romani in the area and is there when the Wolfman returns to pick random people off like a Shark.

Our Lead saves a kid from him, but gets bitten on the neck before the creature is run off.

The Inspector from London is suspicious of him, given his family connections to the deaths and his presence there.

They made him a version of a real life Detective, which is neat...but mostly pointless.  It only really informs one exchange.

Either way, I'm a bit jealous of that beard.

Come next full moon, he turns into the Wolfman.

This transformation is full CGI, but still pretty cool.  He's practical in the rest of it, so we're good.

Like the other Wolfman, he kills a bunch of people and then runs off.

This time, the mob and the Detective just show up as he wanders back to the House in shredded clothes and covered in blood.

They throw him in a Sanitarium- like he was in earlier- and do all sorts of mean, old-timey stuff to him.

He later learns that his Dad was that Wolfman and he killed his own Son to keep him from leaving.  Don't follow that logic to any end point.

He also confirms that he killed the Mom, which Del Toro suspected for a Decade or so.

He transforms in the full moon again because the Psychiatrist is convinced that it is not real.
It ends poorly.

Another chase- reminiscent of the Mr. Hyde one in Van Helsing- and he eventually gets back home.

Wouldn't you know it, it is ANOTHER full moon when he arrives and both parties transform to fight.

He kills the Dad, but Blunt shows up- as do the Detective and some men.

He wounds the Detective- setting up, well, nothing- and chases down Blunt.

Depending on which Ending you watch, he either 

A) Doesn't bite her and dies.
B) Bites her and then dies
C) Bites her and doesn't di.

Yes, this Film has THREE possible Endings to pick from.  Thanks, Clue.

A Film that mostly does a good job of updating the source material.

The Plot is- for better or worse- quite a bit different than the 1941 Film.  I like many of the changes.  I don't love some of them.

I just found it very distracting that Hopkins was Del Toro's Dad.  The fact that he went full on Cartoon Villain at the end didn't help.

The Effects here are really good.  The CGI is mostly used sparingly.  The make-up work, by Rick Baker, is great as always.

Many people- Baker included- would have liked more time to shoot the transformation(s) practically, but there was none. 
That's ironic, given that the Film then sat completed on a shelf for two years!

As far as modern Remakes/updates go, this one is pretty darn good.  It has lots of melodrama and is played 100% seriously, so just bear that in mind.

This Film also has the weirdest case of 'Wait- That's What I Know Him From?!?' in a long time.

Art Malik plays Hopkins' Sikh Manservant...

...but you would know him as the bad guy in True Lies!

Next up, a Film that moved up my list after a personal recommendation.  Let's see what kind of teeth it has!

Should You Bother?: The Expendables- Extended Director's Cut

 I liked The Expendables when it came out in 2010.  It was a Film that knew what it wanted to be and was just that.

I've seen the 2nd and 3rd Films.  I'll see the 4th in time.

Hell, I own all 3 Films.

So, I was surprised as hell to find the Director's Cut sitting in a bin at a Thrift Store.  It was a thing?!?

Well, it is.  
It came out in 2011, released during Production of The Expendables 2.

This one is a bit complicated, but worth talking about...

A quick recap and then I can get into the meat of things...

The Expendables are a group of Mercenaries who take out bad guys.  They're a bit jaded, but take an assignment to help out an Island nation under a Military Coup...and the CIA.

They come in and save the day, growing as people and regaining some humanity in the process.

All yours now, Sly.

Should You Bother?

The big additions here are, get this, Character Moments.

Yes, in a Film like this.

Most of the new Content is about that, including showing a longer version of Statham's initial breakup with his girlfriend and having him talk about how it upsets him later as they explore the Island.

I've read some people say that this is annoying, but, let's be honest- we've all been around guys- and gals- like this.

Other Characters like Jet Li's Ying Yang (they all have codenames FYI) getting some time to talk here and a longer version of Toll Road (Randy Couture) talking about his past experiences.

He gets a nice monologue about his cauliflower ears and how they shaped him, which will surely run during his eventual Oscar Reel.

A small change, but a big one.

In the Theatrical Cut, we see Gunnar (Dolph Lundgren) hired by the bad guys to take out the group (after they fire him).

In the Extended Cut, we see how he got there- he stowed away on the Plane.

On top of that, HE offers them his services, not the other way around.

Mind you, he seems to die in both Cuts and then is just happily alive and back with the group at the End.

There are other changes here, like switching out Music Tracks to better fit the mood and using the Theme Song during the Climax.

Most of them, however, are very minute.

Simply put, Movies- unless you're Clint Eastwood Directing them- do multiple takes and pick the best (hopefully).

As such, nearly every Scene that isn't added is a slightly different take.

To give just one example, this is the Theatrical Cut...

...and the Extended Cut.

This is a Director's Cut after all, so he is just picking the takes that he preferred.

Verdict: Yes.

You can argue about whether he should have cut 'The Boys are Back in Town' from the Film and stuff like that, but honestly, this Version is what Sly wanted to make.

His Characters are more nuanced, have an Arc and are fully formed.

The Theatrical Cut is mostly there, but this is an improvement.

Tubi Thursday: Terror at Black Tree Forest (2010)

 A Film so generic that even its Title has since been reused!

I'm all for helping out Indy Filmmakers, but you have to make something interesting and unique.  I got this instead...

In 1970, a masked man- think The Town That Dreaded Sundown or Friday the 13th: Part 2/3- kills a man and has his way with the Wife.

He sees the kid and chases him, catching up and...

We're just cutting there, eh?

After what felt like 10 minutes of Credits over shots of the same Forest, we just spent nearly 10 minutes in, we meet our Heroes.

They are, say it with me, going Camping.

They hear about an escaped mental patient on the loose via Exposition Radio- Channel 102.5- but ignore it.

He's far away and back in the old Film Stock.

Come nightfall, the killer has dressed up like the guy at the beginning.

You see, he's the kid who survived...apparently and went crazy...apparently.

Now that it is nighttime, they tint things blue and my eyes hurt for the next 30 minutes.

To make a long story- even though the Film is about 50 minutes long without Credits- short, he kills pretty much everyone until we have one Girl left.

She runs, hides and...

...is grabbed by the killer.

She...does something.  Judge for yourself by this shot below.

We see her the next Morning and she says that the Killer is dead, but there's no body.
That's it.
The End.

Oy, where do I begin?

This thing is so stock that I need to make soup out of it!  There's nothing new here- at all.

It's a cliche Story with nothing Characters and nothing out of the ordinary.

By 2010, we've had literally hundreds of Slasher Films, including ones that satirize the Genre to various degrees of success.  Did we need another cheap, nothing-to-see-here Slasher?

There's no irony.
There's no twist.
There's barely any payoff.

It's not so good that you need to see it or so bad that you need to see it ironically.  The Director had, by this point, made 6 other Films- not that you could tell.  He's gone on to make- I s**t you not, 118 more in the ensuing 13 years.

This is a Film so bad that they can't do fake Newspapers right...

A Film made with no hook, no irony and no excitement.  Yea.